1
00:00:21,700 --> 00:00:22,900
- Ready, Kage?
- Ready.

2
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:24,400
Let's do this.

3
00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:26,600
Fatty.

4
00:00:26,700 --> 00:00:28,600
Check. Uggh.

5
00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:30,000
Bean and cheese burrito.

6
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,900
Bean and chee—

7
00:00:33,100 --> 00:00:35,100
Tenacious sound check initiated.

8
00:00:35,100 --> 00:00:36,200
Engage Kage!

9
00:00:36,300 --> 00:00:37,900
Aah!

10
00:00:47,500 --> 00:00:49,300
Ha ha ha ha ha! High-five!

11
00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:51,000
Hnnh!

12
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,100
OK.

13
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:28,700
Two, three...

14
00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:45,100
# A long-ass fucking time ago
in a town called Kickapoo #

15
00:01:45,100 --> 00:01:49,000
# There lived a humble family,
religious through and through #

16
00:01:49,100 --> 00:01:51,100
# But hey,
there was a black sheep #

17
00:01:51,100 --> 00:01:53,600
# And he knew just what to do #

18
00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:57,400
# His name was Young JB
and he refused to step in line #

19
00:01:57,400 --> 00:02:01,200
# A vision he did see of
fucking rocking all the time #

20
00:02:01,300 --> 00:02:05,700
# He wrote a tasty jam
and all the planets did align #

21
00:02:08,600 --> 00:02:10,400
# Oh, the dragon's balls
were blazing #

22
00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:12,500
# As I stepped into his cave #

23
00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:14,600
# Then I sliced
his fucking cockles #

24
00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:16,300
# With my long and shiny blade #

25
00:02:16,300 --> 00:02:17,700
# 'Twas I who
fucked the dragon #

26
00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:19,500
# Fucka lye, sing, fucka loo #

27
00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:21,800
# And if you try
to fuck with me #

28
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:26,000
# Then I shall fuck you too #

29
00:02:26,100 --> 00:02:28,300
# Gotta get it on
in the party zone #

30
00:02:29,700 --> 00:02:31,900
# I gots to shoot a load
in the party zone #

31
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,300
# Gotta lick a toad
in the party zone #

32
00:02:37,100 --> 00:02:39,600
# Gotta suck a choad
in the party zone #

33
00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:43,300
Aaaah!

34
00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:57,800
# You disobeyed my orders, son,
Why were you ever born? #

35
00:02:57,800 --> 00:03:00,100
# Your brother's 10 times
better than you #

36
00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:01,900
# Jesus loves him more #

37
00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:03,600
# This music
that you've played for us #

38
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,400
# Comes from
the depths of hell #

39
00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:07,200
# Rock & roll's
the Devil's work #

40
00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:09,300
# He wants you to rebel #

41
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:11,000
# You'll become
a mindless puppet #

42
00:03:11,100 --> 00:03:12,900
# Beelzebub
will pull the strings #

43
00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:14,600
# Your heart
will lose direction #

44
00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:18,300
# And chaos it will bring #

45
00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:21,100
# You better shut your mouth,
you better watch your tone #

46
00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:26,300
# You're grounded for a week
with no telephone #

47
00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:29,600
# Don't let me hear you cry,
don't let me hear you moan #

48
00:03:29,700 --> 00:03:33,000
# You gotta praise the Lord
when you're in my home #

49
00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:42,800
# Dio, can you hear me?
I am lost and so alone #

50
00:03:42,900 --> 00:03:44,900
# I'm asking for your guidance #

51
00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:47,600
# Won't you come down
from your throne? #

52
00:03:47,700 --> 00:03:52,500
# I need the tight compadre
who will teach me how to rock #

53
00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:57,400
# My father thinks you're evil,
but, man, he can suck a cock #

54
00:03:57,400 --> 00:04:02,400
# Rock is not the Devil's work,
it's magical and rad #

55
00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:09,900
# I'll never rock as long as
I am stuck here with my dad #

56
00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:16,500
# I hear you,
brave young Jables #

57
00:04:16,500 --> 00:04:18,400
# You are hungry for the rock #

58
00:04:18,500 --> 00:04:19,800
# But to learn
the ancient methods #

59
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:21,400
# Secret doors you must unlock #

60
00:04:21,500 --> 00:04:23,100
# Escape your
father's clutches #

61
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:25,400
# And this oppressive
neighborhood #

62
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:31,400
# On a journey you must go
to find the land of Hollywood #

63
00:04:32,700 --> 00:04:35,500
# In the city of fallen angels #

64
00:04:35,500 --> 00:04:38,000
# Where the ocean
meets the sand #

65
00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:40,700
# You will form
a strong alliance #

66
00:04:40,700 --> 00:04:43,900
# And the world's
most awesome band #

67
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,300
# To find your
fame and fortune #

68
00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:48,800
# Through the valley
you must walk #

69
00:04:48,900 --> 00:04:51,500
# You will face your inner demons #

70
00:04:51,600 --> 00:04:59,100
# Now go, my son, and rock! #

71
00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:10,600
# So he bailed
from fucking Kickapoo #

72
00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:12,200
# With hunger in his heart #

73
00:05:12,300 --> 00:05:15,900
# And he journeyed far and wide
to find the secrets of his art #

74
00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:19,800
# But in the end he knew that
he would find his counterpart #

75
00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:24,900
# Rock #

76
00:05:24,900 --> 00:05:31,900
# Ro-o-o-ck #

77
00:05:31,900 --> 00:05:33,700
# Ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-o #

78
00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:39,400
# Hey-yeah-hey-yeah-hey-yeah-
yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-hey-yeah #

79
00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:41,100
# Rock! #

80
00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:28,500
# Tenacious D, Tenacious D #

81
00:06:28,500 --> 00:06:32,100
# D, D, D, D #

82
00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:34,900
# Oh, oh, oh, oh #

83
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,100
# Tenacious #

84
00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:09,600
# Tenacious D, Tenacious D #

85
00:07:13,500 --> 00:07:16,900
# Tenacious D, Tenacious D #

86
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:18,900
# Tenacious D #

87
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:24,500
# Tenacious D,
Ten! Ten! Ten! Ten! #

88
00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:28,800
# Ten is ten, is ten,
is ten, is— #

89
00:07:34,500 --> 00:07:36,100
This place is awesome.

90
00:07:37,300 --> 00:07:39,100
Gold man. Ha ha ha!

91
00:07:59,700 --> 00:08:01,400
Whoa!

92
00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:03,800
Ohhh! Oh, man!

93
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:07,000
- Thank you.
- Oh, my God.

94
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:10,300
OK, that was
the best thing I have ever seen.

95
00:08:11,500 --> 00:08:13,900
- Who are you?
- The name's Kyle Gass.

96
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,700
Kyle Gass.

97
00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:19,500
Dude, will you just teach me
that one thing that you did?

98
00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:21,100
Where you're like, playing—

99
00:08:21,100 --> 00:08:23,300
I'm not giving
free guitar lessons today.

100
00:08:23,300 --> 00:08:25,700
Why don't you stand over there?

101
00:08:25,700 --> 00:08:27,500
Right here?

102
00:08:27,500 --> 00:08:28,900
You're awesome.

103
00:08:28,900 --> 00:08:31,500
This next piece
is by Johann Sebastian Bach—

104
00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:32,900
- Watch this.
- And it's entitled...

105
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,400
<i>Bourrée in E Minor.</i>

106
00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:36,900
Check this out,
this guy's insane.

107
00:08:44,300 --> 00:08:45,700
Man, are you guys stupid.

108
00:08:45,700 --> 00:08:48,900
Don't you know genius
when you see it?

109
00:08:48,900 --> 00:08:50,400
Damn!

110
00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:56,000
Anyway.

111
00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:56,100
My name's JB.

112
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:57,700
My name's JB.

113
00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:00,300
Just rolled into town.

114
00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:02,600
- Would you give me some space?
- Yeah.

115
00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:04,000
You're kinda cramping my style.

116
00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:05,100
Oh, dude, I'm sorry.

117
00:09:05,100 --> 00:09:06,500
And you're driving
away my crowd.

118
00:09:06,500 --> 00:09:09,000
If you just move back,
like I asked you earlier...

119
00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,400
I think things
are going to be a lot better.

120
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:12,400
- OK. Fine. Sorry.
- Thanks.

121
00:09:14,500 --> 00:09:16,000
# Can't you see he's the man? #

122
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:17,900
# Let me hear you applaud #

123
00:09:17,900 --> 00:09:20,400
# He's more than a man,
he's a shining golden god! #

124
00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:21,500
# If you think #

125
00:09:21,500 --> 00:09:22,700
# It's time to fucking rock #

126
00:09:22,700 --> 00:09:24,800
# And fucking roll out of control #

127
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:26,700
# Well, then you know
you've got to rock the block #

128
00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:28,900
# You fucking suck my fucking cock #

129
00:09:28,900 --> 00:09:31,100
# 'Cause when you rule,
you fucking school #

130
00:09:31,100 --> 00:09:33,300
# All of the fools
out of their jewels #

131
00:09:33,300 --> 00:09:35,500
# 'Cause if you think it's time to,
if you think it's time to #

132
00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:39,800
# If you think
it's time to fucking ro-ock #

133
00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:40,900
# He is going #

134
00:09:40,900 --> 00:09:42,600
# To kick your fucking ass #

135
00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:45,200
# And you know
his name is Kyle Gass #

136
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:47,500
# Rocking and fucking rolling #

137
00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:50,800
# And fucking rocking
and fucking rolling #

138
00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:52,600
# And fucking
rip-rip-dip-diddley-diddley #

139
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:54,100
# Rip-rip-dip-diddley-diddley
dip, dip #

140
00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:55,400
# Be-dop-bop-bop,
be-dop-bop-bop #

141
00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:57,400
# Be-dop-bop-bop,
be-dop-bop-bop-boo! #

142
00:09:57,500 --> 00:10:00,000
# Bip-bip-bip-biddle-biddle-boo,
bip-bip-bip-biddle-biddle-boo #

143
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:02,800
# Boo, boo, boo,
boo, boo, boo! #

144
00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:05,400
# Bop-bop-bop-bop-bop-baah!
Bop-bop-bop-bop-bop #

145
00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:08,300
# Bip, bip, bip, bip,
bip, bip, bip, bip #

146
00:10:08,300 --> 00:10:11,400
# Bip, bip, bip, bip-be-doo! #

147
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,100
Yeah!

148
00:10:13,100 --> 00:10:14,900
Dudes!

149
00:10:14,900 --> 00:10:16,700
That was bad-ass.

150
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:20,200
You guys are like electric dynamite.

151
00:10:20,300 --> 00:10:21,600
What's the name of your band?

152
00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:27,900
We're not a band. They calls
me KG Solo Man Five Thousand...

153
00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:32,200
and I aims to keep it that way.

154
00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:34,600
- Aah!
- I'm outta here.

155
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:36,800
This place is tapped.

156
00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:47,100
Jeez Louise, papa cheese.

157
00:10:47,100 --> 00:10:49,300
I know. It's OK.

158
00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:52,100
It's just part of his genius.

159
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:05,300
# Well, I can't get
to sleep tonight #

160
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:11,400
# No matter how hard I try #

161
00:11:13,300 --> 00:11:16,600
# 'Cause it's cold
and it's dark #

162
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:21,000
# And the moon cannot light
the way #

163
00:11:22,500 --> 00:11:24,900
# And Daddy's gone #

164
00:11:27,500 --> 00:11:37,400
# I'm just a baby #

165
00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:41,400
# Aaah-hah-hah-hah #

166
00:11:54,300 --> 00:11:56,900
Well. What do we 'ave 'ere?

167
00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,000
My little snuggles.

168
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:02,400
- Ha ha ha!
- I spy a stinking, filthy fag!

169
00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:05,100
Snivelling, boo-hoo-hoo!

170
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:06,800
Like a wee baby!

171
00:12:06,900 --> 00:12:08,500
Ha ha ha!

172
00:12:08,500 --> 00:12:11,200
He does look like a fucking baby.

173
00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:14,600
Oh! Ha ha. Wee baby.

174
00:12:14,700 --> 00:12:17,600
Listen, fellas. I don't
wanna fight. So if you don't...

175
00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:19,500
Aaaah!

176
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:22,200
Look at this. What is it?

177
00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:24,100
Needs a popping, my brother.

178
00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,400
- Ooh!
- Hey, no. Give me that back.

179
00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:26,600
That's my lucky guitar pick.

180
00:12:26,700 --> 00:12:28,700
That's my lucky guitar pick. Ow!

181
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:31,300
Ah! Argh! Ow!

182
00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:34,900
Ha ha ha!

183
00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:39,100
Hey! Okay! Let's go!

184
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:45,400
Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo! Ha ha ha!

185
00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:49,300
Heh heh heh! Ha ha ha!

186
00:12:57,100 --> 00:12:58,600
Ohh...

187
00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:00,400
That's right, run.

188
00:13:00,500 --> 00:13:03,000
Unless you want
some more of this! Aah!

189
00:13:05,700 --> 00:13:07,400
You saved me.

190
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:10,000
Aah, that's all right.

191
00:13:10,100 --> 00:13:11,200
They had it coming.

192
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:14,300
How can I repay you?

193
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,100
We'll work something out.

194
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,000
This place is futuristic.

195
00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:44,600
Yeah, this is my pad, here.
Number four.

196
00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:47,500
Not hard to remember.
Just think, "My door is four."

197
00:13:47,500 --> 00:13:49,800
Pretty cool.

198
00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:53,200
Wow. Nice pad.

199
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:55,600
You got this place all to yourself?

200
00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:58,700
Yeah. I try to keep it simple.

201
00:13:58,700 --> 00:14:00,200
This is where I stay when I write.

202
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,200
It's quite, uh, minimalist.

203
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:05,100
I don't like anything to get in
the way of my creative juices.

204
00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:06,100
Cool.

205
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:08,000
I'm working on my solo album
right now.

206
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:10,200
Aaah.

207
00:14:10,300 --> 00:14:11,900
Yeah, Kyle Gass Project.

208
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:15,000
It's got some pretty, uh,
breakthrough shit on it.

209
00:14:15,100 --> 00:14:17,000
Trying to keep it
on the hush-hush, though.

210
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:20,200
Man, if you need a singer,
I am so there.

211
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:21,200
Check it out.

212
00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,000
# Ride the tiger! #

213
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:26,700
# You can see his stripes
but you know he's clean #

214
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,600
It's a Ronnie James Dio song.

215
00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:33,100
Yeah. I know.

216
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,800
I helped write it.

217
00:14:34,900 --> 00:14:36,100
I jam with him all the time.

218
00:14:36,100 --> 00:14:37,800
No way!

219
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:40,300
- You do not know Dio!
- Sure.

220
00:14:40,400 --> 00:14:42,700
I know all the dudes
from Sabbath.

221
00:14:44,700 --> 00:14:45,800
- Dude?
- Mm?

222
00:14:48,100 --> 00:14:50,700
Is there any way that
maybe I could audition...

223
00:14:50,700 --> 00:14:52,400
to be in the Kyle Gass Project?

224
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:54,700
Hm. Maybe.

225
00:14:54,700 --> 00:14:56,400
Oh ho ho ho!

226
00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:57,600
You gotta get your chops up,
though...

227
00:14:57,700 --> 00:15:00,100
if you wanna shred
with the big dogs, son.

228
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:01,200
You got a lot to learn.

229
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:05,000
Will you teach me your ways?

230
00:15:06,300 --> 00:15:08,500
I will teach you.

231
00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:11,200
Go ahead and sleep
on the power couch.

232
00:15:11,300 --> 00:15:12,900
Your training begins tomorrow.

233
00:15:12,900 --> 00:15:15,400
At the crack of noon!

234
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:17,800
Um—

235
00:15:19,100 --> 00:15:20,400
# It could have been disaster #

236
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,400
# Till the pupil found his master #

237
00:15:22,500 --> 00:15:23,900
# Something rhymes with master #

238
00:15:23,900 --> 00:15:25,900
# He's teaching
him in the ways of rock #

239
00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:27,900
Lesson number one.

240
00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:29,800
Power slide.

241
00:15:29,900 --> 00:15:34,100
# Aaaah #

242
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:38,200
It's just slidin' on your knees.

243
00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:39,400
Is it?

244
00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:42,500
Or is it the single
most powerful stage move...

245
00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:44,200
in any rocker's arsenal?

246
00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:47,300
Oh.

247
00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:50,900
Gimme a power slide.
Full throttle.

248
00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:53,600
No fear.

249
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:55,500
I'll give you a power slide.

250
00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:01,900
- How'd that feel?
- Really good.

251
00:16:01,900 --> 00:16:03,600
How did it look?

252
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,100
Amazing...

253
00:16:05,100 --> 00:16:06,500
ly bad.

254
00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:09,400
# Doo-doo-doo-
mm-doodle-diddum-doo-doo #

255
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:12,100
# I'm cleaning this apartment #

256
00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:14,800
# 'Cause it's gonna
help me, maybe #

257
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:17,500
# Get into
the Kyle Gass Project #

258
00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:20,300
# Roodle-oodle-doo,
roodle-oodle doo #

259
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:23,100
# Roodle-oodle-doo-doo-doo #

260
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,200
Hey, what's this check
for 200 bucks?

261
00:16:26,300 --> 00:16:28,700
Oh, gimme that.

262
00:16:28,700 --> 00:16:30,300
That's a royalty check.

263
00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:32,400
Why's it say,
"I love you, pumpkin" on it?

264
00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:35,700
Well, um, it's the name
of a song.

265
00:16:35,700 --> 00:16:38,100
Big hit in Canada.

266
00:16:38,300 --> 00:16:39,900
Get back to work.

267
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:44,300
Whoa, check out that superfox!

268
00:16:46,500 --> 00:16:49,000
Do you think you can
handle a woman like that?

269
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:50,700
I think so.

270
00:16:50,700 --> 00:16:52,600
Well, you'd better know so...

271
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:53,900
'cause there's gonna be
ten times hotter ones...

272
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,700
backstage at the Kyle Gass Project.

273
00:16:55,700 --> 00:16:57,100
Really?

274
00:16:57,100 --> 00:17:00,500
Sex is a crucial component
to the Kyle Gass Project.

275
00:17:00,500 --> 00:17:02,100
Now drop
and give me one cock push-up.

276
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:04,400
What's a cock push-up?

277
00:17:04,500 --> 00:17:06,500
What's a cock push-up?

278
00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:09,800
A cock push-up, my friend, is
where you lay on your stomach...

279
00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:12,300
and lift yourself off the ground
with nuthin' but your boner.

280
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,300
No problem.

281
00:17:16,100 --> 00:17:18,200
The cock is a muscle.

282
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:19,500
You gotta learn how to flex it.

283
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:23,700
From now on, I want you to do
one cock push-up a day...

284
00:17:23,700 --> 00:17:25,000
every day.

285
00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:28,000
- It hurts my cock.
- Keep at it. You never know...

286
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,600
when you'll need to fuck your way
out of a tight situation.

287
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:31,800
Whoo!

288
00:17:31,900 --> 00:17:34,000
# Ding-ding-a-ding-
ding-a-ding-ding-ding #

289
00:17:34,100 --> 00:17:36,700
# His fingers move
with blinding speed #

290
00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:39,300
# Within my mind
he'll plant the seed #

291
00:17:39,300 --> 00:17:43,100
# I'm proud to be
amongst his learned flock #

292
00:17:43,100 --> 00:17:45,500
# He teaches me #

293
00:17:45,500 --> 00:17:48,200
# Beseeches me #

294
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:51,000
# And when I've learned
all of his lessons #

295
00:17:51,100 --> 00:17:57,600
# Then I'll know the
ancient secrets of his rock #

296
00:18:00,100 --> 00:18:02,300
Aaah.

297
00:18:02,300 --> 00:18:04,200
Yeah.

298
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,000
Oh oh oh, yeah!

299
00:18:06,100 --> 00:18:08,200
I fucking did it!

300
00:18:08,300 --> 00:18:10,800
Oh, I did it!

301
00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:17,200
Hey. Dude, you reached KG.

302
00:18:17,300 --> 00:18:19,000
You know what to do. Uhhh.

303
00:18:22,700 --> 00:18:25,000
Dude, pick up.

304
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,500
Dude, it's Jables. Pick up, man.

305
00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:30,200
- Yeah.
- Yeah! Ha ha ha!

306
00:18:30,300 --> 00:18:32,000
I did it, man. Check it out.

307
00:18:32,100 --> 00:18:33,300
You hear that?

308
00:18:33,300 --> 00:18:34,800
The training is working, man.

309
00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:36,500
I made ten whole bucks
with my rock!

310
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:38,500
Good. Go score me a dime bag.

311
00:18:38,500 --> 00:18:39,900
A what?

312
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,800
Ten dollars' worth of weed.

313
00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:44,600
Now, listen.
Go down to Wake & Bake Pizza...

314
00:18:44,700 --> 00:18:46,500
Ask for Jojo.

315
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:49,600
Tell him you want
the Bob Marley extra crispy.

316
00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:50,700
He'll know
what you're talking about.

317
00:18:50,700 --> 00:18:52,300
All right, dude. Roger that.

318
00:18:52,300 --> 00:18:54,000
One extra crispy coming up!

319
00:18:55,300 --> 00:18:58,500
Stone Age man
now had the muscle power...

320
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:03,300
and mental power necessary
to evolve to new heights.

321
00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:05,800
He then found the means
to harness...

322
00:19:05,900 --> 00:19:08,700
an even greater energy source.

323
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:14,900
The animals and creatures around him.

324
00:19:14,900 --> 00:19:15,900
Hmm.

325
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:18,400
Animal power would give him the food...

326
00:19:18,500 --> 00:19:22,500
and transportation, the clothing
and entertainment...

327
00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:25,700
- needed for his long journey.
- Dude, turn it to Channel 14.

328
00:19:25,700 --> 00:19:27,700
<i>In Search of Sasquatch</i> is on.

329
00:19:31,500 --> 00:19:35,200
When you are able to snatch
this remote from my hand...

330
00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:37,800
you will be ready to choose
the channels we watch.

331
00:19:38,900 --> 00:19:40,700
Try to snatch it.

332
00:19:54,100 --> 00:19:55,500
Aah, fuck!

333
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:59,000
Patience, young grass smoker.
Patience.

334
00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:01,700
Welcome to the gig simulator.

335
00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:05,200
If you pass this test,
your training is complete.

336
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:09,000
You will be ready to audition
for the KGP.

337
00:20:09,100 --> 00:20:10,100
The what?

338
00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:11,700
Kyle Gass Project?

339
00:20:11,700 --> 00:20:13,000
Oh, right, right.

340
00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:14,800
Hold on.

341
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:17,000
Aaah.

342
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,300
Here's your 'za. That'll be 15.50.

343
00:20:21,300 --> 00:20:23,200
- Cool.
- Hey.

344
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,800
Aren't you the guitar guy
from the boardwalk?

345
00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:28,000
- Yeah.
- I'm Lee.

346
00:20:28,100 --> 00:20:30,700
- Kage.
- Whoa!

347
00:20:30,700 --> 00:20:33,900
You guys puttin' on a concert?
Can I watch?

348
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,000
- Half off the pie?
- Dealio.

349
00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:39,500
Right on. Come on in.

350
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:43,000
Hu...

351
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:49,400
Um... I don't know
if that's such a good idea, KG.

352
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:52,200
Uh, I'd rather not do this
in front of strangers.

353
00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:53,200
What do you think
it's going to be like...

354
00:20:53,300 --> 00:20:54,800
when we play the Coliseum?

355
00:20:54,900 --> 00:20:56,000
No strangers allowed?

356
00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:57,700
OK.

357
00:20:57,800 --> 00:21:00,000
Let the simulation begin.

358
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,900
Uh—Ha ha. All right.

359
00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:04,700
So, should I sing a song?

360
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:08,400
Hey, sing something, douchebag!

361
00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:12,500
OK.

362
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:15,200
You know what? I wanna start
off—offstage and come out...

363
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:17,900
'cause that's the way
I like, imagine it.

364
00:21:17,900 --> 00:21:20,300
Just—just come
in from the wings.

365
00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:24,300
Ladies and gentlemen,
the Kyle Gass Project!

366
00:21:24,300 --> 00:21:25,900
Aaah!

367
00:21:28,100 --> 00:21:31,000
Hey, what's up? I'm JB
from the Kyle Gass Project.

368
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:34,100
Get on with it, dumb shit.

369
00:21:34,100 --> 00:21:37,000
All right, Kage,
let's do it, man. Two, three.

370
00:21:37,100 --> 00:21:40,100
# The Kyle Gass a-Project
is a-out of control! #

371
00:21:40,100 --> 00:21:41,100
# All right! #

372
00:21:43,900 --> 00:21:46,100
Get off the stage,
you stupid dillweed.

373
00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:54,100
# He'd turn me to a diamond
from a piece of coal #

374
00:21:54,100 --> 00:21:56,100
# Yeah yeah yeah #

375
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,300
Boo!

376
00:21:59,300 --> 00:22:02,300
Boo! Boo!

377
00:22:02,300 --> 00:22:03,900
Boooo!

378
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:06,500
Go back to Kickapoo,
you fat-ass momma's boy!

379
00:22:06,500 --> 00:22:08,200
Boo!

380
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:11,200
# You're teaching me
the secrets of the pumpkin patch #

381
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:13,600
- Boo!
- Ow! Aah!

382
00:22:13,700 --> 00:22:15,800
- Boo!
- Urgh.

383
00:22:15,900 --> 00:22:17,500
Hey, that's really...

384
00:22:17,500 --> 00:22:22,700
- Hey! You suck!
- You suck! Suck! Suck!

385
00:22:22,700 --> 00:22:25,600
Jesus. You call that music?

386
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:27,400
You're nothing but a mistake.

387
00:22:27,400 --> 00:22:29,300
I should have worn a condom.

388
00:22:29,300 --> 00:22:31,400
I was not a mistake.

389
00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:33,200
Power slide.

390
00:22:37,700 --> 00:22:40,100
Aaagh! Aaah, aaah!

391
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:43,300
- He's had enough. Turn it off.
- Aagh. Aaaah!

392
00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:45,100
Lights!

393
00:22:45,100 --> 00:22:47,800
- Oooh.
- Hey, hey, it's OK.

394
00:22:47,900 --> 00:22:50,800
- I suck!
- You don't suck.

395
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:52,700
I broke my guitar!

396
00:22:52,700 --> 00:22:53,900
Monster mash!

397
00:22:53,900 --> 00:22:56,900
Nobody passes the gig simulator
on the first time.

398
00:22:56,900 --> 00:22:59,300
Not even this guy.

399
00:22:59,300 --> 00:23:01,300
You didn't?

400
00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:03,500
But then you did pass it later?

401
00:23:03,500 --> 00:23:07,000
I passed later, but, you know,
took me a couple of tries.

402
00:23:07,100 --> 00:23:09,900
- Oh, you did? I was doing...
- You know you can do it.

403
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:11,300
- It was going pretty good.
- Right.

404
00:23:11,300 --> 00:23:13,300
Until I got—until I got to the—

405
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:14,600
When I messed up on that thing.

406
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,700
Let's clean this place up.
What do you say?

407
00:23:16,700 --> 00:23:20,100
And then we'll do bongloads
and play <i>Maximum Overthruster.</i>

408
00:23:20,100 --> 00:23:21,900
- Hey, dude, it's KG.
- Do some bongloads?

409
00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:24,400
You know what to do. Uhhh.

410
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:26,600
Hi, pumpkin. It's your mother.

411
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:28,500
Your father and I have decided...

412
00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:32,800
that 15 years of trying to be a famous
musician is long enough.

413
00:23:32,900 --> 00:23:34,500
So I'm sorry to say...

414
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:36,300
we aren't going to be sending
you any more rent checks.

415
00:23:36,300 --> 00:23:37,700
It's time to get a real job.

416
00:23:37,700 --> 00:23:39,400
I love you, pumpki—

417
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,900
"I love you, pumpkin"?

418
00:23:45,900 --> 00:23:48,200
Those weren't royalty checks.

419
00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:51,300
I can't believe this machine, it's—

420
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:53,100
Let's watch TV, you wanna?

421
00:23:56,300 --> 00:23:58,100
You lied to me.

422
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,200
- You don't know Dio.
- Hey!

423
00:24:05,300 --> 00:24:07,900
I think that <i>In Search</i>
<i>of Sasquatch</i> is on.

424
00:24:07,900 --> 00:24:10,100
- Hold on.
- Give me that fucking remote.

425
00:24:10,100 --> 00:24:12,400
No! Leave it!

426
00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:14,500
No!

427
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:16,600
Aaah!

428
00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:18,200
- Ohhh!
- Aaah!

429
00:24:19,300 --> 00:24:21,700
Who are you?

430
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,800
Here's your lunch, pumpkin.

431
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:26,700
Thanks, Mom.

432
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:28,900
Oh! Mwah!

433
00:24:28,900 --> 00:24:30,000
I love you, pumpkin.

434
00:24:39,300 --> 00:24:40,900
- Hey, pumpkin!
- Ha ha ha!

435
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,100
Hah! What's with the hat, dude?

436
00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:45,000
Your mom sew that for you?
Ha ha ha!

437
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:47,700
Ha ha ha!

438
00:24:47,800 --> 00:24:51,200
- Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
- Oh, my God!

439
00:24:51,300 --> 00:24:53,400
Your mom shine that for you
when you go to bed?

440
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:57,700
- Cue ball!
- Science experiment gone wrong!

441
00:24:57,700 --> 00:24:59,500
- Freakazoid!
- Ha ha ha!

442
00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:03,000
I'm fucking outta here.

443
00:25:09,900 --> 00:25:11,300
Don't walk away from me!

444
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:15,000
I fucking cleaned your apartment, man.

445
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:18,900
What are you doin'?

446
00:25:18,900 --> 00:25:20,800
Why are you packing?

447
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:24,200
I have to go back to my mom and dad's.

448
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:28,000
I'm broke.

449
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:29,600
I already spent the last rent check.

450
00:25:29,700 --> 00:25:32,000
Oh, you fucking dick!

451
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,300
What'd you spend the money on? Huh?

452
00:25:34,300 --> 00:25:36,800
An official professor bullshit degree?

453
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:38,900
What'd you spend the rent on?

454
00:25:48,300 --> 00:25:49,300
I got that for you.

455
00:26:47,700 --> 00:26:49,900
Stop packing, dude.

456
00:26:49,900 --> 00:26:52,700
We're gonna pay the rent...

457
00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:54,700
with our rock.

458
00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:57,400
- We are?
- Yeah.

459
00:26:57,400 --> 00:27:00,900
But we're not gonna be called
the Kyle Gass Project.

460
00:27:00,900 --> 00:27:02,600
From now on...

461
00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:06,200
we will be known as Tenac.

462
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:08,200
Tenac?

463
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:09,900
What's that?

464
00:27:09,900 --> 00:27:12,200
It's a sign.

465
00:27:12,300 --> 00:27:13,900
A legacy.

466
00:27:18,900 --> 00:27:21,700
I've had this birthmark since I was born.

467
00:27:22,700 --> 00:27:24,900
I looked it up in the dictionary.

468
00:27:26,300 --> 00:27:28,600
It's not in there.

469
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:31,000
I never knew what the hell it meant.

470
00:27:31,100 --> 00:27:33,500
Till now.

471
00:27:33,500 --> 00:27:35,800
It's the name of our fuckin' band, dude.

472
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,100
I have ass-mark too.

473
00:27:47,500 --> 00:27:49,100
You guys!

474
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:52,800
Look!

475
00:27:59,100 --> 00:28:01,700
# Whoa! #

476
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:06,600
# They must pay the rent #

477
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:11,000
# With their rock #

478
00:28:11,100 --> 00:28:20,800
# Oh-ohhhh, oh, oh #

479
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:27,700
But thaaaaat's my life.

480
00:28:31,500 --> 00:28:33,100
All right.

481
00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:36,500
Neil Hamburger,
everybody, Neil Hamburger.

482
00:28:36,500 --> 00:28:38,500
Funny stuff.

483
00:28:38,500 --> 00:28:41,300
Uh, the next band
asked me to read this.

484
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:44,000
"Since the beginning of time...

485
00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:48,300
"'twas written in the stones
that one day, a band would come.

486
00:28:48,400 --> 00:28:50,900
"Well, that band has come...

487
00:28:50,900 --> 00:28:53,500
"and now they're here
to come again...

488
00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,100
"in your ear-pussies."

489
00:28:57,400 --> 00:28:59,600
Ladies and gentlemen,
Tenacious D.

490
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:04,000
That was awesome,
the way you read that.

491
00:29:04,100 --> 00:29:05,300
Kage. Kage?

492
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:07,500
Don't forget
to fucking bring the thunder.

493
00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:07,700
- OK.
- Hey, what's up?

494
00:29:07,700 --> 00:29:09,000
- OK.
- Hey, what's up?

495
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:11,100
We're Tenacious D
and this is our first concert ever...

496
00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:12,400
so it's kinda historical.

497
00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:15,400
And, um, we wrote this song that
gives you a little taste...

498
00:29:15,500 --> 00:29:16,700
of, like, the history of the band.

499
00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:18,000
Let's fucking do it, Kage, go!

500
00:29:18,100 --> 00:29:21,500
This is a song called
<i>The History Of Tenacious D.</i>

501
00:29:21,500 --> 00:29:22,500
And it's not just
a list of bullshit...

502
00:29:22,500 --> 00:29:23,600
that we've done in the past.

503
00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:25,400
It's a chronicling of our rise.

504
00:29:25,500 --> 00:29:26,700
To power!

505
00:29:26,700 --> 00:29:29,500
# We ride with kings
on mighty steeds #

506
00:29:29,500 --> 00:29:31,300
# Across the Devil's plain #

507
00:29:31,300 --> 00:29:34,000
# We've walked
with Jesus and his cross #

508
00:29:34,100 --> 00:29:35,800
# He did not die in vain #

509
00:29:35,900 --> 00:29:37,500
# No! #

510
00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:43,000
# We've run with wolves,
we've climbed K2 #

511
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:45,200
# We even stopped a moving train #

512
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,600
# We've traveled through
space and time, my friends #

513
00:29:47,700 --> 00:29:49,300
# To rock this house again #

514
00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:50,900
# Rock! #

515
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:56,400
# We ride and we ride
we'll never subside #

516
00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:58,200
# We'll ride
till the planets collide #

517
00:29:58,300 --> 00:30:00,900
# And if you say that
we do not ride #

518
00:30:00,900 --> 00:30:03,100
# I'll tan your fucking hide #

519
00:30:03,100 --> 00:30:04,800
# Ride! #

520
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:08,900
# Kyle's fingers be silver #

521
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:10,300
# Jack's voice then be gold #

522
00:30:10,300 --> 00:30:12,400
# But lest you think we're vain #

523
00:30:12,500 --> 00:30:14,700
# We know you're all robots
and we don't care #

524
00:30:14,700 --> 00:30:16,200
# Tenacious D #

525
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,100
# We reign! #

526
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:22,400
# We reign #

527
00:30:22,500 --> 00:30:24,600
# Supreme, oh God! #

528
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:26,000
# Burrito supreme #

529
00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:29,200
# And a chicken supreme #

530
00:30:29,300 --> 00:30:31,900
# And a Cutlass Supreme #

531
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:35,500
# Supreme, yeah #

532
00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:38,000
# Gonna count one, two, three #

533
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:41,600
# Supreme, yeah #

534
00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:43,800
# Gonna count one, two, three #

535
00:30:44,500 --> 00:30:47,900
# Supre—ee—eme #

536
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:50,200
# Gonna count one, two, three #

537
00:30:50,300 --> 00:30:52,000
# Burrito supreme #

538
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:54,300
# And a chicken supreme #

539
00:30:54,300 --> 00:30:56,600
# And a Cutlass Supreme #

540
00:30:56,700 --> 00:30:58,700
# Supreme! #

541
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:01,300
Yeah!

542
00:31:01,300 --> 00:31:03,000
Let's go!

543
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:05,500
Ha ha ha!

544
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:07,800
- Yeah!
- Yeah!

545
00:31:09,900 --> 00:31:11,200
You guys, wait for me outside.

546
00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:13,400
I'm gonna go talk to the big cheese.

547
00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:14,500
Good call.

548
00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:18,400
So?

549
00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:20,000
What'd you think?

550
00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:21,700
It was OK.

551
00:31:21,800 --> 00:31:23,200
- It was OK?
- Mm-hm.

552
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:24,400
You were OK. We were kick-ass.

553
00:31:24,500 --> 00:31:26,700
And we're gonna totally win
that money next week...

554
00:31:26,800 --> 00:31:28,400
at the open mic contest.

555
00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:30,400
Well, good luck.

556
00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:32,900
You know there's a lot
of stiff competition, so...

557
00:31:32,900 --> 00:31:36,600
you might wanna think about
writing some new material.

558
00:31:39,900 --> 00:31:43,000
That was amazing. You guys
changed people's lives tonight.

559
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:44,800
I know, we were so awesome.

560
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:47,600
Yeah, it was awesome.
Compared to bullshit.

561
00:31:47,700 --> 00:31:49,200
But compared to the greats?

562
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:53,100
To Zeppelin? To the Beatles?
To fucking Beethoven?

563
00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:56,100
True. We were kick-ass.

564
00:31:56,100 --> 00:31:58,600
But if the D's gonna
win that prize money...

565
00:31:58,700 --> 00:32:01,500
we're gonna have to write
a fucking masterpiece!

566
00:32:02,500 --> 00:32:03,700
Are you with me?

567
00:32:03,700 --> 00:32:05,200
Totally.

568
00:32:05,700 --> 00:32:06,700
Power hug.

569
00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:20,200
Masterpiece.

570
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:23,200
# A masterpiece, a masterpiece #

571
00:32:23,300 --> 00:32:27,000
# They've got to write a masterpiece
to pay the rent #

572
00:32:28,100 --> 00:32:30,700
Do it!

573
00:32:30,700 --> 00:32:32,100
All right,
no more fucking around.

574
00:32:32,100 --> 00:32:34,300
Masterpiece is right in there.

575
00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:36,000
All we have to do is step
into that magic circle...

576
00:32:36,100 --> 00:32:37,500
and the masterpiece is ours.

577
00:32:37,500 --> 00:32:38,800
Are you ready?

578
00:32:38,900 --> 00:32:40,100
Are you ready
to write a fucking masterpiece?

579
00:32:40,100 --> 00:32:41,200
- 'Cause I sure the fuck am.
- Yeah!

580
00:32:41,300 --> 00:32:43,800
Let's go!

581
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:45,200
What are you doing?
Go. Go. Play something.

582
00:32:45,300 --> 00:32:47,300
Go fast. The magic only lasts a second.

583
00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:49,200
No, don't play fast.
I said start fast.

584
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:50,700
But keep going, yes.

585
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:52,900
Try to make it prettier.
Prettier, prettier. Prettier.

586
00:32:52,900 --> 00:32:54,500
Stop judging yourself,
you're judging yourself.

587
00:32:54,500 --> 00:32:55,700
That's why that riff sucks.

588
00:32:55,700 --> 00:32:58,500
No fucking mental blocks.
Release the...

589
00:32:58,500 --> 00:32:59,900
# Chi #

590
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:01,300
That's all right.

591
00:33:01,300 --> 00:33:02,800
Now, can you play a little
higher, higher, higher up?

592
00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:05,300
Higher notes, higher notes,
higher notes, higher notes.

593
00:33:05,300 --> 00:33:07,800
Higher notes, higher notes,
can you play any higher notes?

594
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:09,000
Sorry, I didn't mean to yell.

595
00:33:09,100 --> 00:33:10,400
I'm not looking for anything specific...

596
00:33:10,500 --> 00:33:12,100
but that's definitely
the wrong part of the cosmos.

597
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,600
I want it over here, in the
newer, hotter part. Like—

598
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:17,200
# Molten lava! #

599
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:19,700
# That's the thing,
keep playing that riff #

600
00:33:19,700 --> 00:33:23,100
# Because we gotta
get it on tonight, aah #

601
00:33:23,100 --> 00:33:24,600
What are you doing?
Were we recording?

602
00:33:24,700 --> 00:33:26,300
Press record. Press record.

603
00:33:26,300 --> 00:33:28,100
Oh, God damn it, it's too late!

604
00:33:28,100 --> 00:33:29,900
- Aah. Fu—
- God damn it, Kyle, we had it.

605
00:33:29,900 --> 00:33:32,700
We were right there in it
and you were too slow.

606
00:33:32,700 --> 00:33:35,400
You didn't remember to do shit,
you didn't do what I told you...

607
00:33:35,400 --> 00:33:38,400
and things got crossed,
chakras were fucking exploded.

608
00:33:38,400 --> 00:33:39,600
If we're gonna do this thing right...

609
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:41,300
you gotta do what I tell you to do!

610
00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:44,000
Daaah! Fa-gaah!

611
00:33:45,100 --> 00:33:46,600
I wanna write a masterpiece.

612
00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:49,900
I know, dude. So do I.

613
00:33:53,500 --> 00:33:55,600
It's all right.

614
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:58,900
We've got writers' block,
it happens to the best of 'em.

615
00:33:58,900 --> 00:34:01,000
I mean, look at these guys.

616
00:34:01,100 --> 00:34:03,600
AC/DC. Van Halen.

617
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:05,300
The Who!

618
00:34:05,300 --> 00:34:08,000
Why are you guys so awesome?

619
00:34:08,100 --> 00:34:10,300
What do you have
that we don't have?

620
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:13,500
Well, they all use
the same guitar pick.

621
00:34:14,900 --> 00:34:17,000
What?

622
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:27,000
Looks like they all use
the same guitar pick.

623
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:31,500
Holy shitballs.

624
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:43,600
Too many picks.

625
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,200
Let's see.

626
00:34:49,100 --> 00:34:50,400
I don't think they have it.

627
00:34:50,500 --> 00:34:52,700
Let's talk to the dude. We might
have to special order it.

628
00:34:52,700 --> 00:34:56,100
Marcus, I need a price check
on Ernie Ball amp caster stat.

629
00:34:56,100 --> 00:34:57,600
Just be a second.

630
00:34:57,700 --> 00:34:58,900
Can I help you gentlemen?

631
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:02,100
Yeah, we're looking for
a guitar pick like this one.

632
00:35:08,900 --> 00:35:11,300
How'd you hear about this?

633
00:35:11,300 --> 00:35:12,700
What did Papardello tell you?

634
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:18,700
Uh—Ahem. We just noticed
that all these musicians...

635
00:35:18,700 --> 00:35:19,700
are using the same guitar pick—

636
00:35:19,700 --> 00:35:20,700
Okay ka-ssh!

637
00:35:25,500 --> 00:35:29,900
Jerry, do me a favor, uh, ring up
these amp casters for me.

638
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:31,600
Thank you, my man.

639
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:38,700
In here.

640
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:48,900
We can talk in here.

641
00:35:48,900 --> 00:35:51,200
What you seek...

642
00:35:51,300 --> 00:35:53,000
is the Pick...

643
00:35:54,700 --> 00:35:56,100
of Destiny.

644
00:35:57,900 --> 00:36:00,300
I think there's
a light switch back here.

645
00:36:00,300 --> 00:36:02,300
No, dude, you don't...

646
00:36:04,100 --> 00:36:06,200
Grab a seat.

647
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:08,200
You two bozos
don't even realize it...

648
00:36:08,300 --> 00:36:09,600
but you just stumbled onto...

649
00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:11,500
the darkest secret
in the history of rock.

650
00:36:11,500 --> 00:36:13,500
Go on.

651
00:36:13,500 --> 00:36:15,900
I actually saw it once.

652
00:36:15,900 --> 00:36:17,600
I used to be a guitar tech.

653
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:20,200
So one night, I'm working a gig
up in New Jersey or something.

654
00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:21,600
Some real mediocre band.

655
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:23,800
Lead guitarist comes out,
starts shredding licks...

656
00:36:23,900 --> 00:36:25,700
way beyond his capabilities.

657
00:36:25,800 --> 00:36:27,600
Like shit that had to be
coming from somewhere else.

658
00:36:27,700 --> 00:36:29,700
I noticed he was using a new pick.

659
00:36:29,700 --> 00:36:32,400
Weird-looking thing with horns on it.

660
00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,300
Made of green ivory, or some shit.

661
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:37,700
It was the pick, it wasn't him.

662
00:36:37,700 --> 00:36:39,000
He didn't know what he had, though.

663
00:36:39,100 --> 00:36:40,900
End of the show, he flicks it
back into the audience.

664
00:36:40,900 --> 00:36:43,600
Some kid catches it.

665
00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:45,400
Kid named Eddie.

666
00:36:45,400 --> 00:36:46,400
Eddie?

667
00:36:46,500 --> 00:36:48,000
Van Halen!

668
00:36:48,100 --> 00:36:49,700
Whoa.

669
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:52,000
So I started researching it.

670
00:36:52,100 --> 00:36:56,000
Turns out this thing goes deeper
than I could have imagined.

671
00:36:56,100 --> 00:36:58,000
Way deeper.

672
00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:00,700
Back to the Dark Ages.

673
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:03,100
I moved to Rome. Quit my job.

674
00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:04,600
Learned Latin.

675
00:37:04,700 --> 00:37:07,400
I gained the trust of the
night librarian at the Vatican.

676
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:09,500
A gentleman named
Salvatore Papardello.

677
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:11,700
He turned me on to some shit
that you wouldn't believe.

678
00:37:11,700 --> 00:37:13,800
Check this out.

679
00:37:13,800 --> 00:37:15,900
It's an ancient scroll.

680
00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:17,600
All in Latin.

681
00:37:17,600 --> 00:37:20,300
I translated it. Took me six years.

682
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:22,700
Why didn't you just get a translator?

683
00:37:22,700 --> 00:37:25,100
And let him read it too?

684
00:37:27,900 --> 00:37:30,300
Listen to this.

685
00:37:30,300 --> 00:37:33,600
Long ago, a dark wizard
used his black magic...

686
00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:35,000
to summon Satan himself.

687
00:37:36,100 --> 00:37:37,900
Satanus.

688
00:37:37,900 --> 00:37:39,700
That's Latin for Satan.

689
00:37:39,700 --> 00:37:41,600
A horrific battle ensued.

690
00:37:41,700 --> 00:37:44,400
But the great demon
was far too powerful.

691
00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:46,400
Snakes!

692
00:37:46,500 --> 00:37:49,000
Finish me, foul beast!

693
00:37:49,100 --> 00:37:51,800
Luckily, a blacksmith
heard the beast's roars.

694
00:37:51,900 --> 00:37:54,100
No!

695
00:37:54,900 --> 00:37:56,200
Ow!

696
00:37:56,200 --> 00:37:58,700
Fuck! You chipped my tooth.

697
00:37:58,700 --> 00:38:00,100
I'm not complete.

698
00:38:00,100 --> 00:38:03,400
Venisti remanebis
donec denuo completus sis.

699
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:04,900
What does that mean?

700
00:38:04,900 --> 00:38:08,400
From whence you came
you shall remain...

701
00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:11,700
until you are complete again.

702
00:38:12,700 --> 00:38:14,100
Fuck you! No!

703
00:38:14,200 --> 00:38:17,200
No! I'm not complete!

704
00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:19,500
The demon was drawn back
into the fires of hell...

705
00:38:19,500 --> 00:38:23,400
and the dark wizard
was totally stoked to be alive.

706
00:38:23,400 --> 00:38:25,700
With a long draw on his hash pipe...

707
00:38:25,700 --> 00:38:28,700
the wizard devised a way
to repay the blacksmith.

708
00:38:28,800 --> 00:38:31,000
The blacksmith loved a fair maiden.

709
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:34,300
To gain her affection, he would
need a true master skill...

710
00:38:34,300 --> 00:38:36,900
that would leave the maiden
moist and wanting.

711
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:40,200
And so the wizard fashioned
the demon's tooth...

712
00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:43,200
into a pick that would make
the blacksmith play...

713
00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:46,200
only the most masterful
of melodies on his lute...

714
00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:51,800
thereby winning the heart
of the maiden he loved.

715
00:38:53,100 --> 00:38:56,300
The secret of the pick died
with that blacksmith.

716
00:38:56,300 --> 00:38:57,600
And then... poof!

717
00:38:57,700 --> 00:39:00,900
All of a sudden it reappears
in the American South...

718
00:39:00,900 --> 00:39:03,400
at the turn of the century,
in Robert Johnson's fingers.

719
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:05,900
Spawns the birth of the blues.
And rock & roll.

720
00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:07,100
Of course.

721
00:39:07,100 --> 00:39:09,300
The pick is a tiny part
of the beast...

722
00:39:09,300 --> 00:39:11,600
so it has
supranatural qualities.

723
00:39:11,700 --> 00:39:14,900
- Supernatural?
- No, supra-natural.

724
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:18,400
That's like
a whole other level above super.

725
00:39:18,500 --> 00:39:20,100
Where is it now?

726
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:25,100
That's the last known photo
of the pick.

727
00:39:25,100 --> 00:39:26,500
That guitar was sold at auction.

728
00:39:26,500 --> 00:39:29,800
It now resides in the
Rock & Roll History Museum.

729
00:39:31,100 --> 00:39:33,100
That's where the POD is too.

730
00:39:33,100 --> 00:39:36,200
- The POD?
- The Pick of Destiny.

731
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:37,700
Oh.

732
00:39:37,700 --> 00:39:39,900
Why didn't you just go get it?

733
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:43,000
The Rock & Roll History Museum
is an impenetrable fortress.

734
00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:47,500
You two bozos wanna steal
the Pick of Destiny...

735
00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:48,900
count me out.

736
00:39:48,900 --> 00:39:51,000
I already went down
that rabbit hole once.

737
00:39:51,100 --> 00:39:53,100
And I got news for you.

738
00:39:53,200 --> 00:39:55,500
There's no cheese at
the end of that tunnel, buddy.

739
00:39:56,800 --> 00:39:59,100
All right, get outta here.
I told you enough already.

740
00:39:59,100 --> 00:40:01,000
C'mon, get outta here.

741
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:03,000
Man, I don't know what to say.

742
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:04,700
Shh.

743
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:06,800
Just get outta my store.

744
00:40:09,500 --> 00:40:11,200
The Quest!

745
00:40:19,300 --> 00:40:21,800
Oh, my God! You guys!
What are you doin' here?

746
00:40:21,900 --> 00:40:23,900
- Come on in!
- Actually, we can't stay.

747
00:40:23,900 --> 00:40:25,300
We were hopin'
you'd do us a favor.

748
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:27,600
Anything you need, man.

749
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:30,300
- Do you think it would be OK—
- We need your car.

750
00:40:30,300 --> 00:40:32,300
Oh.

751
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:35,500
Um, well,
kinda need it for work.

752
00:40:35,500 --> 00:40:36,800
Listen, man.

753
00:40:36,900 --> 00:40:39,700
We've got a meeting
with the hugest president...

754
00:40:39,700 --> 00:40:42,300
of the most massive
record company in the business.

755
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:44,700
We need to meet him
in Sacramento tonight.

756
00:40:44,700 --> 00:40:46,100
Oh.

757
00:40:46,100 --> 00:40:47,900
Uh—

758
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:49,700
Well—

759
00:40:49,700 --> 00:40:51,000
All right.

760
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:52,600
Hey, what's up with this pedal?

761
00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:54,000
That's my extra brake.

762
00:40:54,100 --> 00:40:56,800
I'm a pizza delivery guy
and a driving instructor.

763
00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:59,700
I teach people how to drive
while I deliver 'zas.

764
00:40:59,700 --> 00:41:01,700
Ha ha ha! Good thinkin', man.

765
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:03,700
Later.

766
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,600
Knock 'em dead
at the meeting, you guys.

767
00:41:14,700 --> 00:41:16,900
I can't stop thinkin'
about that fuckin' pick.

768
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:19,600
You heard the guy. It's Satan's tooth.

769
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:21,100
When we get that thing...

770
00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:22,700
we're gonna win
that fuckin' prize money...

771
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:25,700
then we're gonna
dominate the world of rock.

772
00:41:26,700 --> 00:41:29,500
We're gonna be unstoppable, man.

773
00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:32,200
Hmmm...

774
00:41:32,300 --> 00:41:34,300
Unstoppable.

775
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:38,100
Unstoppable.

776
00:41:38,100 --> 00:41:40,300
Unstoppable.

777
00:41:40,300 --> 00:41:43,600
This, uh, next band
asked me not to read this...

778
00:41:43,600 --> 00:41:48,600
but, God damn it,
I'm going to read it anyway...

779
00:41:48,700 --> 00:41:50,300
because I wrote it...

780
00:41:50,300 --> 00:41:52,600
and it's the truth.

781
00:41:52,600 --> 00:41:55,500
"I fucking love this band!"

782
00:41:56,600 --> 00:42:00,300
They are the best band ever, period!

783
00:42:00,300 --> 00:42:06,400
Ladies and gentlemen, Tenacious D!

784
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:13,400
Hey, what's up?

785
00:42:13,400 --> 00:42:17,400
Me and KG wrote this song
five minutes ago.

786
00:42:17,400 --> 00:42:19,200
It's called <i>Master Exploder.</i>

787
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:44,900
# Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh
ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh #

788
00:42:44,900 --> 00:42:52,600
# Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh yeah! #

789
00:42:54,300 --> 00:42:57,300
- # I do not need #
- # He does not need #

790
00:42:57,400 --> 00:43:00,700
- # A microphone #
- # A microphone #

791
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:03,200
- # My voice is fucking #
- # Fucking #

792
00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:05,500
# Powerful #

793
00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:15,500
# Ahh, yeah! #

794
00:43:25,700 --> 00:43:34,600
# Ah, ahh, yeah! #

795
00:43:36,100 --> 00:43:37,100
Sorry.

796
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:42,100
- # I did not mean #
- # He did not mean #

797
00:43:42,100 --> 00:43:45,600
- # To blow your mind #
- # To blow your mind #

798
00:43:45,600 --> 00:43:55,800
# But that shit happens to me
all the ti-i-i-ime #

799
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:17,400
- # Now, take a look #
- # Take a look #

800
00:44:17,500 --> 00:44:20,500
- # Tell me what you see #
- # What you see #

801
00:44:20,500 --> 00:44:29,400
# We got the Pick of Destiny—y—y #

802
00:44:29,400 --> 00:44:37,700
# Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh
ahh-ahh yeah! #

803
00:44:41,100 --> 00:44:42,900
Woah!

804
00:44:46,300 --> 00:44:52,000
JB! JB! JB! JB!

805
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:57,200
JB! JB! JB! JB! JB!

806
00:44:57,300 --> 00:44:59,200
- JB! JB! JB!
- JB. JB. JB.

807
00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:01,300
- JB! JB! JB!
- JB. JB. JB.

808
00:45:01,300 --> 00:45:03,600
JB, wake up. JB, wake up!

809
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:07,600
Let's chow down, dude.

810
00:45:07,700 --> 00:45:09,400
- I'm starving.
- OK.

811
00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:29,900
You guys know what you want?

812
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:32,400
Hmm.

813
00:45:32,400 --> 00:45:34,200
What do you recommend?

814
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:36,100
I recommend
that you order some food.

815
00:45:37,300 --> 00:45:38,700
OK.

816
00:45:38,700 --> 00:45:44,400
Uh—Lemme have
the fried chicken and a steak...

817
00:45:45,300 --> 00:45:46,500
and the chicken-fried steak.

818
00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:49,600
Hello.

819
00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:52,200
Um—What happened to your eye?

820
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:56,100
I burned it with a curling iron.

821
00:45:57,400 --> 00:46:00,100
I'll have one small glass
of carrot juice.

822
00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:01,400
Yeah, we don't have that here.

823
00:46:01,500 --> 00:46:03,200
Then I will have nothing.

824
00:46:03,300 --> 00:46:04,900
Great.

825
00:46:08,700 --> 00:46:10,900
- Dude, what's the matter?
- Dude?

826
00:46:10,900 --> 00:46:12,700
Aren't you hungry?
You should eat somethin'.

827
00:46:12,700 --> 00:46:15,100
No. I never eat before a mission.

828
00:46:15,100 --> 00:46:16,600
It slows you down.

829
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:19,100
I gotta be light on my feet
like a dancer.

830
00:46:19,200 --> 00:46:21,000
Like a fuckin' ninja, dude.

831
00:46:21,100 --> 00:46:22,100
Now check this out.

832
00:46:22,100 --> 00:46:23,900
I'm gonna jump this fence here.

833
00:46:23,900 --> 00:46:25,400
OK? Like a gazelle.

834
00:46:25,500 --> 00:46:27,900
Then you come around
that fuckin' bend.

835
00:46:28,000 --> 00:46:30,500
God! Damn it, Kyle!

836
00:46:30,500 --> 00:46:32,400
If we're gonna do this,
you gotta stay focused.

837
00:46:32,500 --> 00:46:34,300
Eye of le tigre!

838
00:46:34,300 --> 00:46:35,400
Now check it out.

839
00:46:35,500 --> 00:46:38,600
You give me a fuckin' boost,
He-Man style.

840
00:46:38,600 --> 00:46:41,000
And then we're gonna fuckin' do
a little mini-tiger roll...

841
00:46:41,100 --> 00:46:42,200
- And come on back.
- Oh, my God. Stop it!

842
00:46:42,200 --> 00:46:43,800
I fuckin' pull your shit up.

843
00:46:43,900 --> 00:46:46,200
Dude, hold on. That's good stuff.

844
00:46:51,500 --> 00:46:54,000
You're right, he's coming over here.

845
00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:58,800
- Oh!
- Fuckin' dick squeezer.

846
00:47:14,800 --> 00:47:16,600
Aaah!

847
00:47:22,300 --> 00:47:23,900
Uh—

848
00:47:30,900 --> 00:47:32,600
Hey...

849
00:47:33,900 --> 00:47:35,900
buddy.

850
00:47:35,900 --> 00:47:38,700
Heh heh heh.

851
00:47:38,700 --> 00:47:42,500
So, uh, what, uh, brings you...

852
00:47:42,500 --> 00:47:45,300
to this neck of the woods?

853
00:47:45,300 --> 00:47:48,100
Um—Ahem. We're just
on a little business trip.

854
00:47:48,100 --> 00:47:49,900
Mm.

855
00:47:49,900 --> 00:47:52,400
Are you, uh, going to, uh...

856
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:55,500
check out
the Rock & Roll History Museum?

857
00:47:55,500 --> 00:47:58,100
- The Rock & Roll what?
- History Museum.

858
00:47:58,200 --> 00:47:59,500
Oh, no. I don't even know
what you're talkin' about.

859
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:03,500
You just seem like
Rock & Roll types to me.

860
00:48:03,600 --> 00:48:05,100
- Ha ha!
- Yeah, well, we're not.

861
00:48:05,100 --> 00:48:07,100
We're just
two fuckin' businessmen...

862
00:48:07,100 --> 00:48:08,700
on our way
to see some shit in Sacramento.

863
00:48:08,700 --> 00:48:11,000
- So, sorry.
- Hmm. Yes. Yes.

864
00:48:11,100 --> 00:48:13,600
I was just asking because...

865
00:48:13,700 --> 00:48:17,100
I noticed the guitars
in the back seat of your car.

866
00:48:17,200 --> 00:48:19,600
Yeah, well, I said,
we're fuckin' businessmen.

867
00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:21,500
We sell guitars. So what?
Big deal. End of story.

868
00:48:21,500 --> 00:48:22,800
Check, please!

869
00:48:22,800 --> 00:48:24,100
You're sure you aren't planning...

870
00:48:24,100 --> 00:48:26,900
on breaking into
the Rock & Roll History Museum?

871
00:48:26,900 --> 00:48:29,000
Hey, gimme that back, man!

872
00:48:31,900 --> 00:48:33,600
Yeah, my buddy and I are in a band.

873
00:48:33,700 --> 00:48:36,400
I don't like to say the name,
but uh, we had some hits...

874
00:48:36,500 --> 00:48:38,300
And so, uh, they're inductin' us...

875
00:48:38,300 --> 00:48:40,800
into the Rock & Roll History Museum.

876
00:48:40,800 --> 00:48:42,700
- No way!
- Aaah.

877
00:48:42,700 --> 00:48:44,100
Way.

878
00:48:44,100 --> 00:48:46,200
Oh, my God. We're sitting
with someone famous?

879
00:48:46,200 --> 00:48:47,700
Ah, we're just regular guys.

880
00:48:47,700 --> 00:48:51,700
I mean, uh,
we're just flesh and... bone.

881
00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:07,700
Let's just say you are planning...

882
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:10,400
on breaking into
the Rock & Roll History Museum.

883
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:13,400
Maybe you are inexperienced...

884
00:49:13,400 --> 00:49:17,500
and you get inside
and cry like little girl.

885
00:49:17,600 --> 00:49:21,200
Maybe you don't have
what it takes to get the job done.

886
00:49:25,100 --> 00:49:27,000
'Scuse me.

887
00:49:29,000 --> 00:49:30,900
Man, God!

888
00:49:36,700 --> 00:49:39,200
Yeah. Damn.

889
00:49:53,500 --> 00:50:00,600
I was thinking maybe there
was something in that museum...

890
00:50:00,600 --> 00:50:02,800
you had a desire for.

891
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:06,900
Maybe—

892
00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:08,600
Pick of Destiny!

893
00:50:13,900 --> 00:50:17,100
Our sorority is throwing
a huge bash tonight.

894
00:50:17,100 --> 00:50:19,200
You guys should totally come...

895
00:50:19,300 --> 00:50:20,800
and play some
of your songs at the party.

896
00:50:20,900 --> 00:50:23,100
We're just getting ready
to head over there right now.

897
00:50:23,200 --> 00:50:25,100
Why don't you follow us over?

898
00:50:25,100 --> 00:50:26,900
You know what?

899
00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:28,200
That sounds rad.

900
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:30,300
We don't usually play private parties...

901
00:50:30,300 --> 00:50:34,600
but I think we can make
some dreams come true tonight.

902
00:50:34,600 --> 00:50:36,400
Hee hee hee hee!

903
00:50:36,500 --> 00:50:37,900
I'll ride along with you.

904
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:39,700
So you don't get lost.

905
00:50:41,200 --> 00:50:45,300
I tried to get
the Pick of Destiny once.

906
00:50:45,300 --> 00:50:48,600
I had it in my hands, too.

907
00:50:48,600 --> 00:50:52,000
But I was caught. Set off a laser.

908
00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:55,100
Security door came down on my leg.

909
00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:57,200
- Cut it right off.
- Ooh.

910
00:50:57,300 --> 00:51:01,200
I would break in again
if I still had my leg.

911
00:51:03,700 --> 00:51:06,700
My leg. Oh, man.

912
00:51:06,800 --> 00:51:10,900
I miss that sweet-ass leg of mine.

913
00:51:10,900 --> 00:51:13,300
Why are you telling me this?

914
00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:21,000
I like you. I see the spark
in your eye that I once had.

915
00:51:21,000 --> 00:51:23,000
Let me show you something.

916
00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:28,400
These are my plans.
They will help you, I promise.

917
00:51:28,500 --> 00:51:31,200
There are two air ducts on the roof.

918
00:51:31,300 --> 00:51:33,500
You must enter through there.

919
00:51:33,500 --> 00:51:35,300
Speak of this to no one!

920
00:51:36,400 --> 00:51:38,100
Wait.

921
00:51:38,100 --> 00:51:39,800
Wait, I have some questions.

922
00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:41,100
Let me wipe.

923
00:51:41,200 --> 00:51:42,200
Hold up, dude.

924
00:51:47,900 --> 00:51:51,200
Dude. I got some smokin' bettys
over there...

925
00:51:51,300 --> 00:51:52,600
and they want us to play a gig.

926
00:51:52,600 --> 00:51:55,700
No. I just had the weirdest
conversation of my life.

927
00:51:55,700 --> 00:51:58,200
This guy just gave me
the perfect plan.

928
00:51:58,200 --> 00:51:59,700
Now, look.

929
00:51:59,800 --> 00:52:03,200
There's two air ducts on the roof.

930
00:52:04,000 --> 00:52:06,300
Dude. The party?

931
00:52:06,300 --> 00:52:08,000
Gettin' to play our own tunes?

932
00:52:08,100 --> 00:52:12,400
That blonde over there wants
to ride my wrinklestick, yo.

933
00:52:12,500 --> 00:52:15,100
Would you get your head out of
the fuckin' pussy-clouds, man?

934
00:52:15,100 --> 00:52:16,800
Who cares about these chicks?

935
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:18,900
There's gonna be ten times
hotter babes backstage...

936
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:20,900
when we win album of the year.

937
00:52:20,900 --> 00:52:23,400
This pick is our ticket to genius.

938
00:52:23,400 --> 00:52:27,300
Dude. I can't believe you'd
pass by a gig opportunity...

939
00:52:27,300 --> 00:52:28,900
with some sweet-ass hotties—

940
00:52:29,000 --> 00:52:30,100
What, for this?

941
00:52:30,100 --> 00:52:32,500
Is this really
that important to you? Huh?

942
00:52:32,500 --> 00:52:35,000
We can still write a masterpiece
and win that dough.

943
00:52:35,100 --> 00:52:36,700
Maybe it would be better for the D...

944
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:38,800
if we worked on our songwriting...

945
00:52:38,800 --> 00:52:41,000
instead of relying on ancient bullshit, but—

946
00:52:41,100 --> 00:52:42,600
probably won't work anyway.

947
00:52:44,100 --> 00:52:45,800
What's it gonna be, Kyle?

948
00:52:45,900 --> 00:52:47,600
You have to decide.

949
00:52:48,500 --> 00:52:51,700
Tits or destiny?

950
00:52:54,900 --> 00:52:56,500
Tits.

951
00:53:05,300 --> 00:53:06,800
So, good luck, buddy.

952
00:53:06,800 --> 00:53:08,800
I hope it was worth it,
because we're done.

953
00:53:08,900 --> 00:53:10,200
You ruined it. Pick's mine.

954
00:53:10,300 --> 00:53:12,200
Fuck you. I don't fuckin' need you.

955
00:53:12,200 --> 00:53:14,600
Later, cock-ass!

956
00:53:19,100 --> 00:53:21,200
Uh, don't mind him. He—

957
00:53:21,300 --> 00:53:22,800
He's my butler.

958
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:24,600
Had to let him go for loafin'.

959
00:53:24,600 --> 00:53:26,000
He—he'll—he'll be fine.

960
00:53:26,100 --> 00:53:29,800
Excuse me, um, are you gonna
charge us for all the refills?

961
00:53:29,800 --> 00:53:32,300
No, you're so pretty,
you get everything for free.

962
00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:39,000
Well, that's a really good deal.

963
00:53:40,200 --> 00:53:46,600
# Ohhh, ahhh, whoa, why? #

964
00:53:46,700 --> 00:53:47,700
# Woo! #

965
00:53:47,800 --> 00:53:49,500
It's just a five-mile walk.

966
00:53:49,600 --> 00:53:52,200
I can walk that.
I don't need a car.

967
00:53:52,300 --> 00:53:54,400
I'll take the fuckin' shoelace express.

968
00:53:54,400 --> 00:53:55,900
Aaaah!

969
00:53:55,900 --> 00:53:58,200
- Woo!
- Fuck you!

970
00:54:04,600 --> 00:54:07,400
# I want you, Jyne #

971
00:54:07,400 --> 00:54:08,900
# All the time #

972
00:54:08,900 --> 00:54:10,300
# I want you, Jyne #

973
00:54:11,700 --> 00:54:14,500
- Where we goin'?
- # I want you, Jyne #

974
00:54:14,500 --> 00:54:17,700
# Gonna make you mine #

975
00:54:17,800 --> 00:54:19,500
# Tonight #

976
00:54:19,600 --> 00:54:22,500
Stop. Stop the music.

977
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:26,800
Everybody, we have got
a special surprise tonight.

978
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:29,500
We have brought with us someone...

979
00:54:29,500 --> 00:54:32,500
who just happens to be a rock star!

980
00:54:32,600 --> 00:54:34,500
Whoo!

981
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:37,200
That's in town to be conducted...

982
00:54:37,200 --> 00:54:40,900
into the Rock & Roll History Museum.

983
00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:42,700
- Whoo!
- Yeah!

984
00:54:42,800 --> 00:54:46,600
And he promised to come here tonight...

985
00:54:46,600 --> 00:54:49,500
and play us a few of his hits.

986
00:54:49,600 --> 00:54:51,200
- Oh—
- So...

987
00:54:51,200 --> 00:54:53,100
- You know—
- Let's give it up!

988
00:54:53,100 --> 00:54:55,400
- Whoo!
- I don't have a guitar.

989
00:54:55,400 --> 00:54:57,600
I don't have my gui—
I don't have a guitar.

990
00:54:57,600 --> 00:54:59,500
- All right!
- Whoo!

991
00:54:59,500 --> 00:55:01,900
- All right, come on!
- Um—

992
00:55:03,600 --> 00:55:06,200
This is a song, um—

993
00:55:06,300 --> 00:55:07,800
I wrote with my partner.

994
00:55:08,500 --> 00:55:10,500
My f—former partner.

995
00:55:10,500 --> 00:55:13,200
And, uh, it's called
<i>The History Of Tenacious D.</i>

996
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:15,200
- Whoo!
- Whoo!

997
00:55:15,300 --> 00:55:17,900
- Nice!
- Yeah!

998
00:55:24,100 --> 00:55:26,400
# Across the Devil's plain #

999
00:55:26,500 --> 00:55:27,700
Huh?

1000
00:55:28,700 --> 00:55:31,100
# He did not die in vain, no #

1001
00:55:31,200 --> 00:55:32,900
- That sucked.
- Yeah.

1002
00:55:32,900 --> 00:55:35,700
# I want you, Jyne #

1003
00:55:35,700 --> 00:55:37,400
- # Need it all the time #
- Ha ha ha!

1004
00:55:37,400 --> 00:55:39,600
- That sucked.
- # I want you, Jyne #

1005
00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:41,500
# Oh, girl, you're so divine #

1006
00:55:41,600 --> 00:55:43,400
# I want you, Jyne #

1007
00:55:47,800 --> 00:55:49,800
One more and that's it.

1008
00:55:53,800 --> 00:55:55,500
Aah.

1009
00:55:56,900 --> 00:55:58,500
It's a good thing
I found these mushrooms.

1010
00:55:58,500 --> 00:56:00,800
I was fucking starving.

1011
00:56:00,900 --> 00:56:03,600
Mmm. Mm.

1012
00:56:03,600 --> 00:56:05,300
Aah.

1013
00:56:08,300 --> 00:56:10,300
This place is kinda...

1014
00:56:13,700 --> 00:56:15,400
juicy.

1015
00:56:17,600 --> 00:56:21,300
Zzzzzhing!

1016
00:56:34,900 --> 00:56:36,800
Ha ha ha!

1017
00:56:44,700 --> 00:56:46,500
Hee hee!

1018
00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:57,600
Oh, my God! Sasquatch!

1019
00:56:57,600 --> 00:56:59,900
Aaaaah!

1020
00:56:59,900 --> 00:57:02,900
Jables! What's up?

1021
00:57:02,900 --> 00:57:04,200
Ho ho ho!

1022
00:57:04,300 --> 00:57:06,800
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1023
00:57:07,400 --> 00:57:10,000
What are you doin' out here?

1024
00:57:10,100 --> 00:57:12,500
I was just walkin'
in your beautiful forest.

1025
00:57:12,500 --> 00:57:15,700
Oh, it's not my fowest, bwother.

1026
00:57:15,800 --> 00:57:17,900
It's evewyone's.

1027
00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:19,600
You're so fuckin' awesome.

1028
00:57:19,600 --> 00:57:22,500
I love yoooou!

1029
00:57:22,600 --> 00:57:24,400
I love you too, JB.

1030
00:57:24,500 --> 00:57:26,900
You're a awesome rocker.
Ha ha ha!

1031
00:57:26,900 --> 00:57:29,000
Whoo!

1032
00:57:29,000 --> 00:57:31,500
- Let's pway!
- Ha ha ha!

1033
00:57:31,600 --> 00:57:34,200
Aaaaah!

1034
00:57:34,300 --> 00:57:37,100
Aaaaah-oooh!

1035
00:57:37,200 --> 00:57:38,600
That's good.

1036
00:57:38,600 --> 00:57:40,800
- Let's go on a adventure.
- Yeah!

1037
00:57:40,900 --> 00:57:44,100
I got lots to show you.

1038
00:57:44,200 --> 00:57:46,400
Can I be a Sasquatch too?

1039
00:57:47,700 --> 00:57:50,200
You alweady are.

1040
00:57:50,200 --> 00:57:52,700
You're my son, JB.

1041
00:57:52,700 --> 00:57:54,900
My widdle baby Sass.

1042
00:57:55,000 --> 00:57:57,000
# La-la-lai-la #

1043
00:57:57,100 --> 00:57:59,400
# La, la, la-la-la-la-la-la #

1044
00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:00,400
Oh!

1045
00:58:00,500 --> 00:58:03,100
Let's take a dip
in the stwawberry wiver!

1046
00:58:03,100 --> 00:58:04,900
- Yay!
- Come on!

1047
00:58:04,900 --> 00:58:05,900
Oooh!

1048
00:58:05,900 --> 00:58:07,600
# Let's go #

1049
00:58:10,200 --> 00:58:14,000
Ohhhh! Yeah. This is fun.

1050
00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:17,000
Ohhhhh!

1051
00:58:17,100 --> 00:58:20,700
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1052
00:58:20,700 --> 00:58:22,900
Good times.

1053
00:58:22,900 --> 00:58:24,200
- This is fun.
- Good times.

1054
00:58:24,300 --> 00:58:26,800
This is—This is super fun!

1055
00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:32,800
Ha ha ha!

1056
00:58:32,900 --> 00:58:34,900
Ohhh!

1057
00:58:34,900 --> 00:58:36,800
Ha ha! Daddy, look. Look.

1058
00:58:36,800 --> 00:58:38,200
It's stuck to my butt.

1059
00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:41,700
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1060
00:58:41,800 --> 00:58:43,800
Shake your tushie, it'll fall off.

1061
00:58:43,900 --> 00:58:46,000
- Aah!
- Oh!

1062
00:58:46,100 --> 00:58:48,400
Let's get wid of these.

1063
00:58:50,500 --> 00:58:52,500
- Ah!
- # Ooh, la-la-la, ooh #

1064
00:58:52,500 --> 00:58:55,100
- Time to fly.
- Yeah.

1065
00:58:55,200 --> 00:58:58,300
- Whee.
- Ha ha ha! Whee!

1066
00:58:58,400 --> 00:59:02,200
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1067
00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:02,300
- Hee hee! Hee hee hee!
- We're flying!

1068
00:59:02,300 --> 00:59:06,100
- Hee hee! Hee hee hee!
- We're flying!

1069
00:59:06,100 --> 00:59:08,500
- We're flying!
- Hold on, boy!

1070
00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:10,700
# Found where the Sasquatch hide #

1071
00:59:10,700 --> 00:59:12,700
# In the misty mountainside #

1072
00:59:12,700 --> 00:59:17,300
# He's got shiny diamonds
that he's got to protect #

1073
00:59:17,300 --> 00:59:19,600
# Look into the Sasquatch eye #

1074
00:59:19,700 --> 00:59:21,500
# Then you know
that Sass can fly #

1075
00:59:21,500 --> 00:59:26,300
# Sasquatch is my daddy
and he's going to protect me! #

1076
00:59:26,400 --> 00:59:28,100
# Half man and half machine #

1077
00:59:28,200 --> 00:59:30,200
# On the cover of a magazine #

1078
00:59:30,200 --> 00:59:34,900
# Bigfoot is my father
and he's got to protect me! #

1079
00:59:34,900 --> 00:59:36,800
# These lyrics don't make sense #

1080
00:59:36,900 --> 00:59:38,500
# Think I've found the evidence #

1081
00:59:38,500 --> 00:59:42,600
# That yeti is my papa
and he wants to protect— #

1082
00:59:42,600 --> 00:59:44,300
# Me! #

1083
00:59:45,600 --> 00:59:48,300
Do you know where
I can find the Pick of Destiny?

1084
00:59:48,300 --> 00:59:51,700
Sure! It's right over there!

1085
00:59:51,800 --> 00:59:53,300
Oh! Let's get it!

1086
00:59:53,400 --> 00:59:56,600
I can get it if I surf on your—

1087
00:59:56,600 --> 00:59:59,300
Aaah! Aaah! Aaah!

1088
01:00:00,500 --> 01:00:02,400
Aaaaah! Sweet baby!

1089
01:00:03,500 --> 01:00:07,900
Oh! Aaaah! Aaaah! Aaaah! Aaaah!

1090
01:00:08,000 --> 01:00:09,400
Ow!

1091
01:00:11,500 --> 01:00:13,000
Oh, God!

1092
01:00:14,200 --> 01:00:16,100
Hoo hoo hoo hoo!

1093
01:00:16,200 --> 01:00:18,400
Oh! Oh, God.

1094
01:00:21,800 --> 01:00:23,200
Oh, God.

1095
01:00:23,300 --> 01:00:25,400
Where the fuck am I?

1096
01:00:28,400 --> 01:00:29,900
Yeah, you motherfucker.

1097
01:00:29,900 --> 01:00:31,100
I'm gonna get that son—

1098
01:00:47,300 --> 01:00:50,100
# Dude, I totally miss you #

1099
01:00:50,100 --> 01:00:52,500
# I really fuckin' miss you #

1100
01:00:52,500 --> 01:00:56,300
# I'm all alone all the time #

1101
01:00:56,300 --> 01:00:58,100
# All the time #

1102
01:00:58,200 --> 01:01:00,700
# Dude, I totally miss you #

1103
01:01:00,800 --> 01:01:03,500
# The things we did together #

1104
01:01:03,600 --> 01:01:08,500
# Where have you gone? #

1105
01:01:09,800 --> 01:01:13,400
# Totally miss the honesty
and special times #

1106
01:01:13,400 --> 01:01:19,000
# And honestly I totally miss
the fucked up thing you do #

1107
01:01:20,200 --> 01:01:23,700
# Dude, I totally miss you #

1108
01:01:23,700 --> 01:01:25,900
# I totally miss you #

1109
01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:30,700
# Dude, I totally miss you
all the time #

1110
01:01:32,700 --> 01:01:37,100
# Aaaah #

1111
01:01:38,500 --> 01:01:42,700
# Aaaah #

1112
01:01:45,500 --> 01:01:48,300
# Aaaah-aaaah-aaaah #

1113
01:01:48,300 --> 01:01:52,900
- # Aaaah, I totally aaaah you #
- Ha ha ha!

1114
01:01:53,000 --> 01:01:54,400
Did you see that?

1115
01:01:54,400 --> 01:01:56,200
- That was awesome.
- # Dude, I totally miss you #

1116
01:01:56,300 --> 01:01:58,900
- That was great.
- # I totally miss you #

1117
01:01:59,000 --> 01:02:04,300
# Dude, I totally miss you
all the time #

1118
01:02:06,500 --> 01:02:11,100
# All the t-i-i-ime #

1119
01:02:23,100 --> 01:02:24,600
# The mission is clear #

1120
01:02:24,700 --> 01:02:26,000
# I'm goin' over there #

1121
01:02:26,000 --> 01:02:28,700
# I'm goin' to do the mission #

1122
01:02:28,700 --> 01:02:31,500
# I'm going to flip around the corner
flat as a pancake #

1123
01:02:31,600 --> 01:02:34,200
# And then l—Oh, no, the camera! #

1124
01:02:34,200 --> 01:02:36,700
# Stay back here, devise a plan #

1125
01:02:36,800 --> 01:02:40,400
# Dive into the bushes #

1126
01:02:40,500 --> 01:02:42,800
# Against all odds #

1127
01:02:42,900 --> 01:02:46,300
# Infiltrate, storm the gate! #

1128
01:02:47,400 --> 01:02:48,600
# Storm the gate! #

1129
01:02:48,600 --> 01:02:51,200
- # Ninja style, Samurai #
- # Storm the gate! #

1130
01:02:51,200 --> 01:02:54,300
- # Metal pole, climb that shit #
- # Storm the gate! #

1131
01:02:54,300 --> 01:02:56,700
# Climb into that motherfucker #

1132
01:02:56,700 --> 01:02:59,200
# Now I'm climbin' up, up on a roof #

1133
01:02:59,300 --> 01:03:02,700
# I've got catlike reflexes, flip— #

1134
01:03:02,700 --> 01:03:03,900
- ... me, I elbow him—
- One guy?

1135
01:03:04,000 --> 01:03:05,000
He's tryin' to punch me in the neck.

1136
01:03:05,000 --> 01:03:06,700
- Yeah.
- I look down...

1137
01:03:06,800 --> 01:03:09,100
and there's two guys goin',
"I'm—We're gonna punch you."

1138
01:03:09,200 --> 01:03:10,600
So they're punchin' up at me...

1139
01:03:10,700 --> 01:03:12,800
I got both elbows down like this.

1140
01:03:12,900 --> 01:03:14,000
Pull both their hair...

1141
01:03:14,100 --> 01:03:15,900
and I made them both
poke each other's eyes out.

1142
01:03:15,900 --> 01:03:17,800
So they're both blind,
there's blood everywhere—

1143
01:03:17,800 --> 01:03:20,900
# Against all odds #

1144
01:03:21,000 --> 01:03:23,400
# Infiltrate, oh, storm the gate! #

1145
01:03:23,400 --> 01:03:25,400
What the fuck?

1146
01:03:28,700 --> 01:03:31,400
# Two air vents on the roof #

1147
01:03:31,400 --> 01:03:34,200
# That's what the guy was talkin' a—shit! #

1148
01:03:34,200 --> 01:03:36,100
- Fuck!
- # Electric eye #

1149
01:03:37,700 --> 01:03:40,600
# Infiltrate, storm the gate! #

1150
01:03:41,800 --> 01:03:43,100
# Storm the gate! #

1151
01:03:44,100 --> 01:03:47,800
# Storm the gate! #

1152
01:03:48,600 --> 01:03:49,300
Ow!

1153
01:03:49,400 --> 01:03:53,000
God damn it! Aah!

1154
01:03:53,000 --> 01:03:53,300
God! That was KG's fault.

1155
01:03:53,300 --> 01:03:55,500
God! That was KG's fault.

1156
01:03:55,500 --> 01:03:57,100
If he'd been here
like we planned...

1157
01:03:57,200 --> 01:03:58,300
he coulda lowered me down
with a rope...

1158
01:03:58,300 --> 01:04:00,100
but dick-ass
had to follow his cock.

1159
01:04:00,100 --> 01:04:04,400
And you know when I go quadruple
plat he'll come a-knockin'--

1160
01:04:04,400 --> 01:04:07,500
"Dude, can I come back
and join the band now?"

1161
01:04:07,500 --> 01:04:09,800
And I'll be like,
"No way, cockshiner."

1162
01:04:09,800 --> 01:04:11,300
And then he'll be like—

1163
01:04:11,300 --> 01:04:12,300
Can you hear me?

1164
01:04:12,400 --> 01:04:14,600
Oh, yeah.
I hear you loud and clear.

1165
01:04:14,600 --> 01:04:16,200
You're sayin' ho's before bro's.

1166
01:04:16,300 --> 01:04:18,100
Well, that's not how I roll, asshole.

1167
01:04:18,200 --> 01:04:21,600
JB, it's KG. Do you read me?

1168
01:04:24,500 --> 01:04:26,400
What do you want, non-rocker?

1169
01:04:26,400 --> 01:04:28,500
This line is reserved for rockers only...

1170
01:04:28,500 --> 01:04:30,500
so I can't really talk
to you right now.

1171
01:04:30,500 --> 01:04:33,500
Sex, drugs, and then rock & roll.

1172
01:04:33,600 --> 01:04:35,500
In that order.
I was just followin' the code.

1173
01:04:35,600 --> 01:04:37,200
You're a fuckin' traitor.

1174
01:04:37,200 --> 01:04:39,000
You bailed on me,
and now I'm in the shit.

1175
01:04:39,000 --> 01:04:41,200
Where the fuck are you?

1176
01:04:43,300 --> 01:04:45,300
I'm in the air duct, dude.

1177
01:04:49,100 --> 01:04:54,500
- Dude. I totally missed you.
- Me too.

1178
01:05:07,900 --> 01:05:09,300
I just heard a noise.

1179
01:05:09,300 --> 01:05:11,900
I am trippin'.

1180
01:05:11,900 --> 01:05:13,800
Are you stoned?

1181
01:05:13,900 --> 01:05:15,700
Listen.

1182
01:05:17,800 --> 01:05:20,400
Uh, I just heard a noise.

1183
01:05:20,400 --> 01:05:22,100
- I'm gonna go check it out.
- Copy that.

1184
01:05:22,200 --> 01:05:23,800
Mm.

1185
01:05:44,800 --> 01:05:46,700
Uh—

1186
01:05:50,100 --> 01:05:52,400
Classic Rock is clear.

1187
01:05:52,400 --> 01:05:54,300
I'm gonna go check out Punk.

1188
01:05:54,400 --> 01:05:56,300
And if I find anybody in there...

1189
01:05:56,400 --> 01:05:59,100
I'm gonna pop a fuckin' cap
in their ass.

1190
01:05:59,200 --> 01:06:00,900
I'm gonna call it self-defense.

1191
01:06:00,900 --> 01:06:02,600
Hello?

1192
01:06:04,300 --> 01:06:05,500
I'm on my own.

1193
01:06:16,500 --> 01:06:18,700
Oh, God.

1194
01:06:21,500 --> 01:06:22,700
Dude, you heard that guy.

1195
01:06:22,800 --> 01:06:24,300
He's gonna shoot us. Let's bail.

1196
01:06:24,400 --> 01:06:26,300
No. We're too close.

1197
01:06:26,300 --> 01:06:27,600
That pick is in one of these rooms...

1198
01:06:27,600 --> 01:06:29,400
and we're not leavin' here
without it.

1199
01:06:29,400 --> 01:06:31,000
Dude, look at this place.

1200
01:06:31,000 --> 01:06:33,300
It's huge. We're never
gonna find this thing.

1201
01:06:33,400 --> 01:06:36,400
Follow me. We are the shadows.

1202
01:06:36,400 --> 01:06:39,000
They'll never find what cannot be seen.

1203
01:07:20,200 --> 01:07:22,700
Center.

1204
01:07:25,500 --> 01:07:26,800
Picks, picks.

1205
01:07:26,900 --> 01:07:29,200
Where do they keep their fuckin' picks?

1206
01:07:29,300 --> 01:07:30,800
It's gotta be in the Guitar Gods room.

1207
01:07:30,900 --> 01:07:32,400
- Where's that?
- It's right here.

1208
01:07:32,400 --> 01:07:35,100
At the top of Guitarway to Heaven.

1209
01:08:16,600 --> 01:08:18,000
There it is.

1210
01:08:22,100 --> 01:08:25,200
Fuck-a-luck-a-ding-dong.

1211
01:08:25,200 --> 01:08:26,800
- Let's go get it.
- No!

1212
01:08:28,800 --> 01:08:29,900
Lasers.

1213
01:08:30,000 --> 01:08:31,900
They'll slice you to pieces.

1214
01:08:32,000 --> 01:08:33,400
Sizzlelean.

1215
01:08:34,600 --> 01:08:37,100
You stay here and keep a lookout.

1216
01:08:37,100 --> 01:08:40,000
Wh—What are you gonna do?

1217
01:08:40,100 --> 01:08:42,500
I'm goin' in there and gettin' that pick.

1218
01:08:46,100 --> 01:08:47,700
# Danger #

1219
01:08:49,500 --> 01:08:51,500
# Laser #

1220
01:08:52,800 --> 01:08:54,500
# Tetris #

1221
01:08:55,900 --> 01:08:57,300
# lmpossible #

1222
01:08:57,300 --> 01:08:59,500
Be careful.

1223
01:08:59,600 --> 01:09:01,200
# Q-Bert #

1224
01:09:03,100 --> 01:09:04,400
# Frogger #

1225
01:09:05,000 --> 01:09:06,000
Uh! Uh!

1226
01:09:06,000 --> 01:09:08,700
# Dig Dug #

1227
01:09:08,700 --> 01:09:11,500
# Marble Madness #

1228
01:09:13,300 --> 01:09:14,600
# Centipede #

1229
01:09:14,700 --> 01:09:16,400
# Millipede #

1230
01:09:16,400 --> 01:09:17,700
# Tenacious #

1231
01:09:17,800 --> 01:09:18,900
You got it.

1232
01:09:20,100 --> 01:09:21,100
# lmpossible #

1233
01:09:22,000 --> 01:09:23,000
# lmpossible #

1234
01:09:25,500 --> 01:09:28,900
Can't... reach... pick.

1235
01:09:29,000 --> 01:09:31,200
Surrounded by lasers.

1236
01:09:31,300 --> 01:09:32,600
Focus, Jables.

1237
01:09:34,500 --> 01:09:37,000
Use all your mental powers.

1238
01:09:38,800 --> 01:09:41,100
Wait.
There's a button down here.

1239
01:09:42,800 --> 01:09:44,800
I think it might deactivate the lasers...

1240
01:09:45,700 --> 01:09:47,800
But I can't reach it.

1241
01:09:47,900 --> 01:09:49,300
The cock.

1242
01:09:50,600 --> 01:09:52,200
Use the cock.

1243
01:10:04,300 --> 01:10:06,500
Come on, helmet head.

1244
01:10:06,500 --> 01:10:07,700
Get it up.

1245
01:10:07,700 --> 01:10:09,300
# Cock #

1246
01:10:11,700 --> 01:10:13,800
Ooh.

1247
01:10:14,600 --> 01:10:17,400
# Cock, cock, cock #

1248
01:10:18,500 --> 01:10:20,300
# Cock, cock, cock #

1249
01:10:20,400 --> 01:10:22,200
Aaah! Mmm!

1250
01:10:22,200 --> 01:10:25,300
- # Cock, cock, cock, cock #
- Come to Papa.

1251
01:10:25,400 --> 01:10:27,700
- # Cock #
- Oh! Aaah!

1252
01:10:27,700 --> 01:10:29,400
Oh, yeah!

1253
01:10:41,500 --> 01:10:43,600
Let's finish this.

1254
01:10:49,200 --> 01:10:51,300
# Hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey #

1255
01:10:51,300 --> 01:10:53,600
# Prekeh-goo-goo-boo
ba-dum-biddly-beep-beep #

1256
01:10:54,700 --> 01:10:56,900
Aaah!

1257
01:10:56,900 --> 01:10:58,200
Fuck.

1258
01:10:58,300 --> 01:10:59,400
I can't reach it.

1259
01:10:59,500 --> 01:11:01,400
- I can't reach it.
- Hold on!

1260
01:11:02,500 --> 01:11:04,200
Aaaaah!

1261
01:11:05,600 --> 01:11:07,400
That's it, that's it.

1262
01:11:07,400 --> 01:11:09,000
I got it! I got it! Aaah!

1263
01:11:09,000 --> 01:11:10,500
- Aaah! Aaah!
- Aaah!

1264
01:11:14,400 --> 01:11:18,100
Ah! Aaah! Oh! Aaah!

1265
01:11:19,800 --> 01:11:21,200
- Uh...
- Oh!

1266
01:11:21,200 --> 01:11:24,300
Ha ha ha ha!

1267
01:11:24,900 --> 01:11:25,900
Aaaaaah!

1268
01:11:28,700 --> 01:11:30,300
Haul ass!

1269
01:11:34,100 --> 01:11:36,000
Aaaaaah!

1270
01:11:36,800 --> 01:11:38,500
Aaaaaah!

1271
01:11:42,800 --> 01:11:44,800
Halt! Stop!

1272
01:11:50,200 --> 01:11:51,200
Aaah!

1273
01:11:56,100 --> 01:12:01,000
Power slide!

1274
01:12:03,500 --> 01:12:07,400
# Yeah! #

1275
01:12:17,900 --> 01:12:21,500
- Oh, damn!
- Ugh! Why?

1276
01:12:23,300 --> 01:12:25,000
- That was awesome.
- I know.

1277
01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:26,900
I've never fired a gun before,
it was unbelievable.

1278
01:12:27,000 --> 01:12:29,100
Aah! Oh, God! Oh!

1279
01:12:29,100 --> 01:12:30,800
Oh! Hold up!

1280
01:12:32,700 --> 01:12:34,400
- We got it!
- Fuck, yeah.

1281
01:12:34,500 --> 01:12:35,700
Let's get the fuck outta here.

1282
01:12:35,700 --> 01:12:39,300
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1283
01:12:39,300 --> 01:12:41,300
Nice work, boys.

1284
01:12:41,300 --> 01:12:47,000
Now, toss that pick over here,
nice and slow.

1285
01:12:47,000 --> 01:12:50,500
Or I will cut you from hole to hole.

1286
01:12:50,500 --> 01:12:52,900
Then you might as well kill us, man...

1287
01:12:52,900 --> 01:12:54,400
'cause there is no way in hell...

1288
01:12:54,500 --> 01:12:55,900
we're givin' you this fuckin' pick.

1289
01:12:55,900 --> 01:12:57,900
OK.

1290
01:12:58,000 --> 01:13:00,200
So be it.

1291
01:13:00,200 --> 01:13:02,400
Come over here.

1292
01:13:02,400 --> 01:13:04,500
I'm going to fucking stab you.

1293
01:13:05,900 --> 01:13:08,500
What?

1294
01:13:08,500 --> 01:13:10,500
No. We're not comin' over there.

1295
01:13:10,600 --> 01:13:12,300
Fine.

1296
01:13:12,400 --> 01:13:14,900
Stay where you are, then.

1297
01:13:14,900 --> 01:13:16,600
I'm going to come over there.

1298
01:13:16,700 --> 01:13:21,600
I am going to slice out
your eyes and your balls.

1299
01:13:21,600 --> 01:13:25,500
And then I am going to stick
your eyes in your ballsacks...

1300
01:13:25,500 --> 01:13:27,100
and then I will take your balls...

1301
01:13:27,100 --> 01:13:29,600
and I will put them in your eyeholes!

1302
01:13:29,700 --> 01:13:31,300
Dude, we could totally outrun him.

1303
01:13:31,300 --> 01:13:32,900
Totally, let's bail.

1304
01:13:32,900 --> 01:13:35,900
N—No, wait! Co—Come back here!

1305
01:13:35,900 --> 01:13:37,000
Gaaah!

1306
01:13:37,000 --> 01:13:39,100
Come back with my pick!

1307
01:13:40,000 --> 01:13:41,400
It belongs to me!

1308
01:13:42,900 --> 01:13:44,400
Freeze!

1309
01:13:45,500 --> 01:13:48,600
Catch me if you can.

1310
01:13:51,200 --> 01:13:52,200
Aaah!

1311
01:13:54,800 --> 01:13:57,200
# Kings! #

1312
01:13:58,100 --> 01:14:02,100
Yeah! Yeah!

1313
01:14:03,500 --> 01:14:05,700
Whoo!

1314
01:14:05,700 --> 01:14:07,800
Fifty miles to Los Angeles.

1315
01:14:07,800 --> 01:14:08,800
- We did it!
- Yeah!

1316
01:14:08,800 --> 01:14:10,000
- Yeah!
- I know.

1317
01:14:10,000 --> 01:14:11,700
I'm surprised no one even chased us.

1318
01:14:11,700 --> 01:14:13,000
We got away scot-free.

1319
01:14:13,000 --> 01:14:15,600
- You fuckin' rule.
- No. You fuckin' rule.

1320
01:14:15,600 --> 01:14:18,700
Yeah, but I couldn't have done it
without your training.

1321
01:14:18,700 --> 01:14:20,800
Dude, let's see the pick.

1322
01:14:20,900 --> 01:14:22,600
- Oh, shit.
- Dude, you got it, right?

1323
01:14:22,600 --> 01:14:24,500
Yes! Ha ha ha!

1324
01:14:24,600 --> 01:14:26,200
- Look at how awesome it is!
- Ohhhh!

1325
01:14:26,300 --> 01:14:27,800
- Now we have the power.
- Yes!

1326
01:14:27,800 --> 01:14:30,300
We shall carry on its ancient legacy.

1327
01:14:30,300 --> 01:14:33,000
Dude, we are gonna smoke
the competition...

1328
01:14:33,100 --> 01:14:34,300
at the open mic night tonight.

1329
01:14:34,300 --> 01:14:36,300
- That money is ours!
- Mm. Totally.

1330
01:14:39,200 --> 01:14:41,900
Yeah, I got some, uh, fellas
with a broken taillight.

1331
01:14:43,300 --> 01:14:44,600
- Oh, fuck. It's the cops.
- Is it? Oh... Oo.

1332
01:14:44,600 --> 01:14:46,300
Pull over. Pull over. It's cool.

1333
01:14:46,300 --> 01:14:47,400
- OK.
- Pull over.

1334
01:14:48,300 --> 01:14:50,000
All right. Just play it cool.

1335
01:14:50,100 --> 01:14:52,100
M'kay? They got nothin' on us.

1336
01:14:52,200 --> 01:14:54,600
Let's just be mellow, OK?

1337
01:14:57,500 --> 01:14:59,000
What're you doing? No!

1338
01:14:59,000 --> 01:15:01,000
What the fuck are you doing?

1339
01:15:01,000 --> 01:15:02,700
This is Officer Mackenzie,
I need backup.

1340
01:15:02,700 --> 01:15:05,000
Assailants turning south
down Lexington Avenue.

1341
01:15:05,000 --> 01:15:06,000
I'm in pursuit.

1342
01:15:06,000 --> 01:15:08,400
Oh, God damn it, Kyle!

1343
01:15:08,400 --> 01:15:10,100
# Car chase city,
that's the name of the game #

1344
01:15:10,200 --> 01:15:11,200
- I want out!
- # It was all groovy #

1345
01:15:11,200 --> 01:15:12,400
# Now it's totally lame #

1346
01:15:12,500 --> 01:15:14,300
# KG really fuckin'
blew a synapse #

1347
01:15:14,400 --> 01:15:16,600
# Now we're fuckin' headed
for a total collapse #

1348
01:15:16,700 --> 01:15:18,300
# Car chase city,
run away from the fuzz #

1349
01:15:18,300 --> 01:15:20,500
# Thought that we wasn't
but we totally was #

1350
01:15:20,500 --> 01:15:22,200
# Car chase city,
now we're off-a the map #

1351
01:15:22,300 --> 01:15:23,900
# Car chase city,
now we're takin' a crap #

1352
01:15:24,000 --> 01:15:25,400
- # Now it's gettin' hairy #
- Oh, fuck!

1353
01:15:25,400 --> 01:15:26,600
- # So we're changin' the key #
- God damn it!

1354
01:15:26,600 --> 01:15:28,100
# Never underestimate
the power of D #

1355
01:15:28,200 --> 01:15:30,200
# KG fuckin' put his foot on the gas #

1356
01:15:30,200 --> 01:15:32,200
# If I go to prison,
hide the pick in my ass #

1357
01:15:32,300 --> 01:15:34,100
# Fuck this shit, it's gone too far #

1358
01:15:34,100 --> 01:15:36,300
# Kage, pull over,
let me out of the car #

1359
01:15:36,300 --> 01:15:38,500
The car is severely damaged.

1360
01:15:38,500 --> 01:15:41,300
The perpetrators appear to be
two heavyset males...

1361
01:15:41,300 --> 01:15:43,500
driving a blue Cutlass Supreme.

1362
01:15:43,500 --> 01:15:45,000
# Car chase city,
now we're takin' the lane #

1363
01:15:45,100 --> 01:15:47,000
# KG blew it now we're goin' insane #

1364
01:15:47,000 --> 01:15:50,400
# Let's rock, let's roll,
let me try to fill up your— #

1365
01:15:50,500 --> 01:15:53,400
Let's go now to Mark in Skycop—

1366
01:15:55,200 --> 01:15:56,500
God damn it!

1367
01:15:58,300 --> 01:16:01,200
- Yeah?
- Hey, you guys!

1368
01:16:01,200 --> 01:16:02,800
- Fuck!
- It's Lee.

1369
01:16:02,800 --> 01:16:05,500
I'm just checkin' in.
Is everything OK?

1370
01:16:05,600 --> 01:16:07,600
Yeah, we're cool. We're super cool.

1371
01:16:07,700 --> 01:16:09,000
Ah! Ahh!

1372
01:16:09,000 --> 01:16:11,000
Um, where are you guys?

1373
01:16:11,000 --> 01:16:12,400
We're, uh, we're at the drive-in.

1374
01:16:12,500 --> 01:16:13,600
We're watchin this bitchin' movie.

1375
01:16:13,600 --> 01:16:15,500
It's, uh, <i>Cop Chase 3</i>.
Have you seen it?

1376
01:16:15,500 --> 01:16:20,500
Aaaaaah!

1377
01:16:20,600 --> 01:16:23,100
Uh, no. I haven't seen that one.

1378
01:16:23,200 --> 01:16:25,100
Whoa!

1379
01:16:25,200 --> 01:16:26,500
Sounds scary, though.

1380
01:16:26,500 --> 01:16:28,500
Yeah. Uh, it's really fucking scary.

1381
01:16:28,600 --> 01:16:30,600
I'm shaking right now, I'm so scared.

1382
01:16:30,700 --> 01:16:33,100
Cool. Well, how was that, uh...

1383
01:16:33,100 --> 01:16:35,100
big power meeting you guys had?

1384
01:16:35,200 --> 01:16:36,900
Awesome. I'll tell you about it later.

1385
01:16:36,900 --> 01:16:38,700
You're makin' us miss the movie.

1386
01:16:41,300 --> 01:16:43,200
I think I lost em!

1387
01:16:47,200 --> 01:16:48,800
Gaah!

1388
01:16:48,900 --> 01:16:51,800
# Gas! Brakes! #

1389
01:16:53,300 --> 01:16:55,100
# Spinnin' donuts,
spinnin' donuts, go! #

1390
01:16:55,100 --> 01:16:56,700
I can do this.

1391
01:16:56,700 --> 01:16:57,700
# Flip flip! #

1392
01:16:58,800 --> 01:17:00,900
- # Gas #
- Nooo!

1393
01:17:01,000 --> 01:17:03,300
- # Nitro! #
- Go!

1394
01:17:03,300 --> 01:17:06,300
# Aaaaah! #

1395
01:17:21,800 --> 01:17:23,900
We're gonna need
paramedics and fire trucks.

1396
01:17:23,900 --> 01:17:25,900
These guys are toast.

1397
01:17:32,400 --> 01:17:34,600
Let's get the fuck outta here.

1398
01:17:34,600 --> 01:17:36,500
Let's go.

1399
01:17:36,500 --> 01:17:39,000
Uh, which way, which way?

1400
01:17:39,000 --> 01:17:40,100
OK, where?

1401
01:17:40,200 --> 01:17:42,000
That way! That way!

1402
01:17:44,200 --> 01:17:46,300
This is it, I think.

1403
01:17:46,400 --> 01:17:49,000
Uh! Oooh! Uh!

1404
01:17:49,100 --> 01:17:51,300
- Lemme sneak a peek.
- OK.

1405
01:17:54,600 --> 01:17:57,200
Uh! Huh.

1406
01:17:57,200 --> 01:17:58,900
- This is it.
- Oh.

1407
01:18:02,100 --> 01:18:03,600
C'mon.

1408
01:18:03,700 --> 01:18:05,000
Oh, fuck.

1409
01:18:05,000 --> 01:18:07,000
- Let's do this.
- OK.

1410
01:18:08,200 --> 01:18:10,300
Hey. Hey.

1411
01:18:10,400 --> 01:18:11,600
Hey, guys, you're runnin' a little late.

1412
01:18:11,700 --> 01:18:13,500
There's one spot left.
You got any new material?

1413
01:18:13,600 --> 01:18:16,300
What we got's gonna turn
your brain into shit.

1414
01:18:16,300 --> 01:18:20,000
Dust off the stage,
open mic host. Step aside.

1415
01:18:21,100 --> 01:18:22,600
OK, big shots.

1416
01:18:22,600 --> 01:18:24,000
You're up whenever you're ready.

1417
01:18:24,000 --> 01:18:26,500
Let's blister this asshole.

1418
01:18:26,500 --> 01:18:28,700
Jack, wait! You got the pick?

1419
01:18:28,700 --> 01:18:30,000
Yeah. Got it right here.
Let's go.

1420
01:18:30,100 --> 01:18:33,000
Maybe I should use it tonight
and you use it next time.

1421
01:18:33,000 --> 01:18:34,700
I should use it tonight.
I'm the lead singer.

1422
01:18:34,700 --> 01:18:37,600
Huh! It's a guitar pick.
I'm lead guitar.

1423
01:18:37,700 --> 01:18:39,300
OK, dude, don't freak out on me.

1424
01:18:39,300 --> 01:18:41,200
Let's just work this out rationally, OK?

1425
01:18:41,200 --> 01:18:42,400
We'll take turns with it.

1426
01:18:42,400 --> 01:18:43,800
I'll use it now, you'll use it later.

1427
01:18:43,900 --> 01:18:46,500
I'm not freakin' out,
you're freakin' out.

1428
01:18:46,600 --> 01:18:49,300
Now, just let me hold it
for one second!

1429
01:18:49,300 --> 01:18:52,200
You're never gonna use
this fuckin' pick.

1430
01:18:53,400 --> 01:18:54,400
Aaah!

1431
01:18:54,400 --> 01:18:55,600
Aaaah!

1432
01:18:55,600 --> 01:18:57,600
- No!
- No!

1433
01:18:57,600 --> 01:18:59,500
You guys, the crowd's
gettin' restless in there.

1434
01:18:59,500 --> 01:19:00,500
- No!
- Hey, wh-what's—

1435
01:19:00,500 --> 01:19:02,300
What's goin' on?

1436
01:19:02,400 --> 01:19:04,000
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
what's wrong?

1437
01:19:04,000 --> 01:19:06,000
We can't go on.

1438
01:19:06,000 --> 01:19:08,400
We had the demon's pick...

1439
01:19:08,400 --> 01:19:09,500
but then we broke it...

1440
01:19:09,600 --> 01:19:12,500
and now our masterpiece
will never happen.

1441
01:19:12,500 --> 01:19:16,000
We can't pay the rent because
we won't be fueled by Satan.

1442
01:19:16,000 --> 01:19:18,300
Come on, get up, get up.

1443
01:19:18,400 --> 01:19:21,800
Come on, come on. Stand up.
You're all right.

1444
01:19:21,900 --> 01:19:25,800
You guys, having
some satanic guitar pick...

1445
01:19:25,800 --> 01:19:28,000
isn't gonna make
your rock any better...

1446
01:19:28,100 --> 01:19:30,700
because Satan's not
in a guitar pick...

1447
01:19:30,700 --> 01:19:32,300
he's inside all of us.

1448
01:19:32,400 --> 01:19:34,100
He's in here.

1449
01:19:34,200 --> 01:19:35,800
In your hearts.

1450
01:19:35,900 --> 01:19:38,700
He's what makes us
not want to go to work...

1451
01:19:38,700 --> 01:19:42,300
exercise, or tell the truth.

1452
01:19:42,300 --> 01:19:43,900
He's what makes us want to party...

1453
01:19:43,900 --> 01:19:46,400
and have sex with each other
all night long.

1454
01:19:47,500 --> 01:19:50,100
He's that little voice in your mind...

1455
01:19:50,200 --> 01:19:53,700
that says, "Fuck you"
to the people you hate.

1456
01:19:53,700 --> 01:19:56,600
Now, you can stay out here
and fight on the ground...

1457
01:19:56,600 --> 01:19:59,100
and cry like babies.

1458
01:19:59,200 --> 01:20:04,400
Or you can go in there
like friends and rock.

1459
01:20:05,900 --> 01:20:08,200
So, what's it gonna be?

1460
01:20:10,000 --> 01:20:13,600
Let's go in there and show 'em
what Tenacious D is all about.

1461
01:20:13,600 --> 01:20:14,900
Yeah.

1462
01:20:15,000 --> 01:20:18,300
I already got a guitar pick anyways.

1463
01:20:21,900 --> 01:20:23,600
C'mon.

1464
01:20:58,400 --> 01:21:00,600
Dude, we can still use the pick.

1465
01:21:00,600 --> 01:21:02,400
You use one half, I'll use the other.

1466
01:21:02,500 --> 01:21:03,700
There's still some juice
in there, probably.

1467
01:21:03,800 --> 01:21:04,700
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1468
01:21:04,800 --> 01:21:06,300
Where is that...?

1469
01:21:06,400 --> 01:21:07,600
Aaaah!

1470
01:21:16,800 --> 01:21:20,300
# I am complete #

1471
01:21:20,400 --> 01:21:24,100
# Fu-uck #

1472
01:21:24,100 --> 01:21:26,000
# Yes, you are fucked #

1473
01:21:26,000 --> 01:21:27,700
# Shit out of luck #

1474
01:21:27,700 --> 01:21:30,800
# Now I'm complete
and my cock you will suck #

1475
01:21:30,900 --> 01:21:32,900
# This world will be mine #

1476
01:21:33,000 --> 01:21:34,800
# And you're first in line #

1477
01:21:34,800 --> 01:21:38,700
# You brought me the pick
and now you shall both die #

1478
01:21:38,700 --> 01:21:45,800
# Wait, wait, wait,
you motherfucker #

1479
01:21:46,400 --> 01:21:51,700
# We challenge you
to a rock-off #

1480
01:21:53,900 --> 01:21:58,700
# Give us one chance
to rock your socks off #

1481
01:22:00,600 --> 01:22:06,000
# Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! #

1482
01:22:06,100 --> 01:22:09,500
# The demon code prevents me #

1483
01:22:09,500 --> 01:22:13,400
# From declining
a rock-off challenge #

1484
01:22:13,500 --> 01:22:16,400
# What are your terms? #

1485
01:22:16,400 --> 01:22:20,100
# What's the ca-a-atch? #

1486
01:22:21,600 --> 01:22:29,400
# If we win you must take
your sorry ass back to hell #

1487
01:22:30,600 --> 01:22:38,200
# And also you will have
to pay our rent #

1488
01:22:40,700 --> 01:22:43,200
# And what if I win? #

1489
01:22:45,200 --> 01:22:50,300
# Then you can take
Kage back to Hell #

1490
01:22:50,300 --> 01:22:51,400
What?

1491
01:22:51,400 --> 01:22:52,900
Trust me, Kage.

1492
01:22:53,000 --> 01:22:54,400
It's the only way.

1493
01:22:54,400 --> 01:22:55,800
What are you talking about?

1494
01:22:55,800 --> 01:22:59,500
# To be your little bitch #

1495
01:22:59,600 --> 01:23:01,200
Fine!

1496
01:23:01,200 --> 01:23:04,400
# Let the rock-off begin! #

1497
01:23:04,400 --> 01:23:07,400
Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1498
01:23:11,600 --> 01:23:15,500
# I'm the Devil, I love metal #

1499
01:23:18,700 --> 01:23:22,700
# Check this riff,
it's fucking tasty #

1500
01:23:26,500 --> 01:23:30,100
# I'm the Devil,
I can do what I want #

1501
01:23:30,200 --> 01:23:33,300
# Whatever I've got,
I'm gonna flaunt #

1502
01:23:33,300 --> 01:23:38,500
# There's never been
a rock-off that I've ever lost #

1503
01:23:41,100 --> 01:23:44,500
# I can't wait to take
Kage back to hell #

1504
01:23:44,600 --> 01:23:48,500
# I'm gonna fill him
with my hot demon's gel #

1505
01:23:48,600 --> 01:23:52,200
# I'll make you squeal
like the Scarlet Pimpernel #

1506
01:23:55,400 --> 01:23:57,900
# No! #

1507
01:23:59,900 --> 01:24:01,000
Come on, Kage!

1508
01:24:01,000 --> 01:24:05,100
Let's fight his music with our music.

1509
01:24:05,200 --> 01:24:08,000
# There's just no way
that we can win #

1510
01:24:08,000 --> 01:24:10,700
- # That was a masterpiece #
- Listen to me.

1511
01:24:10,700 --> 01:24:14,900
# He rocks too hard
because he's not a mortal man #

1512
01:24:14,900 --> 01:24:16,000
Goddamnit, Kage.

1513
01:24:16,000 --> 01:24:19,100
# He gonna make you
his sex slave #

1514
01:24:19,200 --> 01:24:21,200
# You gonna gargle mayonnaise #

1515
01:24:21,300 --> 01:24:22,800
- No.
- # Unless we bust #

1516
01:24:22,900 --> 01:24:25,800
# A massive monster mamojam #

1517
01:24:25,900 --> 01:24:29,900
# Dude, we've been
through so much shit #

1518
01:24:29,900 --> 01:24:32,500
# Deactivated lasers
with my dick #

1519
01:24:32,500 --> 01:24:38,200
# Now it's time
to blow this fucker down #

1520
01:24:38,300 --> 01:24:41,500
# Come on, Kage, now
it's time to blow doors down #

1521
01:24:41,600 --> 01:24:44,700
# I hear ya, Jables, now
it's time to blow doors down #

1522
01:24:44,800 --> 01:24:47,700
# Light up the stage 'cause
it's time for a showdown #

1523
01:24:47,700 --> 01:24:50,500
# We'll bend you over then we'll
take ya to brown town #

1524
01:24:50,500 --> 01:24:54,200
# Now we've got
to blow this fucker down #

1525
01:24:54,300 --> 01:24:57,100
# He's gonna rape me
if we do not blow doors down #

1526
01:24:57,100 --> 01:24:59,500
# C'mon, Kage 'cause it's time
to blow doors down #

1527
01:24:59,600 --> 01:25:02,500
# Ooooh we'll pile-drive ya,
it's time for the smack down #

1528
01:25:02,600 --> 01:25:05,500
# Hey, Antichrist-a, Beelzeboss #

1529
01:25:05,600 --> 01:25:07,100
# We know your weakness #

1530
01:25:07,100 --> 01:25:08,700
# Our rock it sauce #

1531
01:25:08,700 --> 01:25:11,800
# We rock the Casbah,
and blow your mind #

1532
01:25:11,900 --> 01:25:15,000
# We will defeat you
for all mankind #

1533
01:25:15,100 --> 01:25:18,100
# You hold the scepter,
we hold the key #

1534
01:25:18,100 --> 01:25:21,200
# You are the Devil,
we are the D #

1535
01:25:21,300 --> 01:25:23,400
# We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D #

1536
01:25:23,400 --> 01:25:26,400
# We are the D, we are the D,
we are the D, we are the D #

1537
01:25:26,500 --> 01:25:28,900
# We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D #

1538
01:25:29,000 --> 01:25:32,000
# We are the D, we are the D,
we are the D, we are the D #

1539
01:25:32,100 --> 01:25:35,000
# We are the D,
we are the D, we are the D #

1540
01:25:37,300 --> 01:25:38,700
You guys are fuckin' lame!

1541
01:25:38,700 --> 01:25:40,600
C'mon, Kage,
you're comin' with me.

1542
01:25:42,100 --> 01:25:44,600
Taste my lightning, fucker.

1543
01:25:44,600 --> 01:25:46,800
Nooo!

1544
01:25:46,800 --> 01:25:48,100
Ow!

1545
01:25:48,100 --> 01:25:50,700
Fuck! My fuckin' horn!

1546
01:25:51,800 --> 01:25:53,700
- Oh, no!
- From whence you came...

1547
01:25:53,800 --> 01:25:58,000
you shall remain,
until you are complete again!

1548
01:25:58,700 --> 01:26:02,400
Nooo!

1549
01:26:10,800 --> 01:26:13,000
Fuck you, Kage!

1550
01:26:13,000 --> 01:26:16,100
And fuck you, Jables.

1551
01:26:16,200 --> 01:26:20,200
I'll get you, Tenacious D!

1552
01:26:40,700 --> 01:26:44,100
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1553
01:26:44,100 --> 01:26:45,400
We did it, dude.

1554
01:26:46,200 --> 01:26:48,200
We beat the Devil.

1555
01:26:48,300 --> 01:26:49,900
With our rock.

1556
01:26:50,000 --> 01:26:52,700
Ha ha ha! So good.

1557
01:26:52,700 --> 01:26:56,100
Aaah, man, that was
a monster jam that we played.

1558
01:26:56,100 --> 01:26:57,500
Yeah. Yeah.

1559
01:26:57,500 --> 01:27:00,600
It was, like,
the greatest song in the world.

1560
01:27:00,600 --> 01:27:01,700
It was, wasn't it?

1561
01:27:01,700 --> 01:27:04,600
- How did it go?
- Um...

1562
01:27:07,300 --> 01:27:09,500
- I can't remember.
- Fuck. I can't either.

1563
01:27:09,500 --> 01:27:12,800
You know what? Let's just
lay down a fresh, tasty jam.

1564
01:27:12,800 --> 01:27:15,200
Good idea, rage Kage.

1565
01:27:15,200 --> 01:27:18,100
- Bust out the BOD.
- What?

1566
01:27:18,200 --> 01:27:19,700
The Bong of Destiny.

1567
01:27:19,700 --> 01:27:21,800
Good call.

1568
01:27:21,900 --> 01:27:23,500
Whoa.

1569
01:27:26,900 --> 01:27:28,700
Take it to the head, bitch.

1570
01:27:30,700 --> 01:27:32,200
Draws like a pencil.

1571
01:27:34,100 --> 01:27:36,100
Press record.

1572
01:27:37,600 --> 01:27:39,400
Ooooh!

1573
01:27:39,500 --> 01:27:42,200
- Ha ha ha!
- Yeah!

1574
01:27:42,200 --> 01:27:44,900
Now let's rock it.

1575
01:27:44,900 --> 01:27:46,300
One, two, three.

1576
01:27:46,400 --> 01:27:50,500
# 'Cause it's
the Pick of Destiny, child #

1577
01:27:50,500 --> 01:27:53,800
# You know we will be rockin'
'cause it's fuckin' insane #

1578
01:27:53,800 --> 01:27:57,900
# It's just the Pick of Destiny, child #

1579
01:27:57,900 --> 01:28:01,800
# More precious than
a diamond on a platinum chain #

1580
01:28:01,900 --> 01:28:05,700
# In Venice Beach
there was a man named Kage #

1581
01:28:05,700 --> 01:28:09,300
# When he was buskin'
he was all the rage #

1582
01:28:09,400 --> 01:28:13,000
# He met Jables
and he taught him well #

1583
01:28:13,100 --> 01:28:16,900
# All the techniques
that were developed in Hell #

1584
01:28:16,900 --> 01:28:20,400
# Cock push-ups
and the power slide #

1585
01:28:20,400 --> 01:28:24,100
# Gig simulation,
now there's nowhere to hide #

1586
01:28:24,200 --> 01:28:27,800
# They formed a band
they named Tenacious D #

1587
01:28:27,800 --> 01:28:30,600
# And then they got
the Pick of Destiny #

1588
01:28:30,600 --> 01:28:34,600
# 'Cause it's the Pick of Destiny, child #

1589
01:28:34,600 --> 01:28:38,000
# You know we will be rockin'
'cause it's fuckin' insane #

1590
01:28:38,000 --> 01:28:42,200
# It's just the Pick of Destiny, child #

1591
01:28:42,300 --> 01:28:45,700
# Our tasty grooves are better
than a chicken chow mein #

1592
01:28:45,800 --> 01:28:49,600
# 'Cause he who is sleazy
is easy to pleasey #

1593
01:28:49,600 --> 01:28:53,100
# And she who is juicy
must be loosey-goosey #

1594
01:28:53,200 --> 01:28:58,000
# And he who is groovy will
be in my movie so come on! #

1595
01:29:00,700 --> 01:29:04,400
# The wizard and the demon
had a battle royale #

1596
01:29:04,400 --> 01:29:08,100
# The demon almost killed him
with an evil kapow #

1597
01:29:08,100 --> 01:29:11,200
# But then it broke his tooth
and thus the demon said, "Ow!" #

1598
01:29:11,200 --> 01:29:15,400
# 'Cause it's the Pick of Destiny, child #

1599
01:29:15,500 --> 01:29:18,600
# You know we will be rockin'
'cause it's fuckin' insane #

1600
01:29:18,700 --> 01:29:22,800
# It's just the Pick of Destiny, child #

1601
01:29:22,900 --> 01:29:26,400
# You know our movie's
better than-a <i>Citizen Kane</i> #

1602
01:29:26,400 --> 01:29:30,100
# 'Cause he who's a geezer
must live in my freezer #

1603
01:29:30,100 --> 01:29:33,900
# And she who is snarky
is full of malarkey #

1604
01:29:34,000 --> 01:29:39,800
# And he who is groovy must
be in my movie so come on! #

1605
01:29:51,600 --> 01:29:56,100
# Oh, 'cause if you're a diva
then go to Geneva #

1606
01:29:56,200 --> 01:29:59,900
# And if you're a crony
then suck on my boney #

1607
01:29:59,900 --> 01:30:03,100
# And if you are groovy
then get in my movie #

1608
01:30:03,100 --> 01:30:07,200
# It's called the Pick of Destiny #

1609
01:30:07,200 --> 01:30:11,500
# The Pick of Destiny #

1610
01:30:11,500 --> 01:30:11,900
# The Pick of Destiny #

1611
01:30:20,800 --> 01:30:22,600
# You can't kill the metal #

1612
01:30:25,200 --> 01:30:26,700
# The metal will live on #

1613
01:30:29,000 --> 01:30:31,500
# Punk rock tried to kill the metal #

1614
01:30:33,200 --> 01:30:36,700
# But they failed as they
were smite to the ground #

1615
01:30:38,600 --> 01:30:41,500
# New wave tried to kill the metal #

1616
01:30:41,500 --> 01:30:45,900
# But they failed as they were
stricken down to the ground #

1617
01:30:47,200 --> 01:30:50,100
# Grunge tried to kill the metal #

1618
01:30:50,100 --> 01:30:51,800
Ah ha ha ha!

1619
01:30:51,800 --> 01:30:55,500
# They failed as they were
thrown to the ground #

1620
01:30:58,500 --> 01:31:02,900
# Aaaah! #

1621
01:31:02,900 --> 01:31:04,700
# Yeah! #

1622
01:31:07,000 --> 01:31:11,300
# Aaaah! #

1623
01:31:11,300 --> 01:31:13,600
# Yeah! #

1624
01:31:13,700 --> 01:31:15,700
# Diddle-iddle-iddle,
diddle-iddle-iddle, iddle-ay #

1625
01:31:15,800 --> 01:31:19,700
# No one can destroy the metal #

1626
01:31:19,800 --> 01:31:24,200
# The metal will strike you down
with a vicious blow #

1627
01:31:24,200 --> 01:31:28,400
# We are the vanquished foes of the metal #

1628
01:31:28,400 --> 01:31:32,900
# We tried to win,
for why we do not know #

1629
01:31:33,000 --> 01:31:36,500
# New wave
tried to destroy the metal #

1630
01:31:36,500 --> 01:31:41,500
# But the metal had its way #

1631
01:31:41,600 --> 01:31:45,500
# Grunge then tried to dethrone the metal #

1632
01:31:45,500 --> 01:31:50,100
# But metal was in the way #

1633
01:31:50,200 --> 01:31:54,100
# Punk rock tried to destroy the metal #

1634
01:31:54,100 --> 01:31:58,500
# But metal was much too strong #

1635
01:31:58,500 --> 01:32:02,600
# Techno tried to defile the metal #

1636
01:32:02,700 --> 01:32:08,400
# But techno was proven wrong, yeah! #

1637
01:32:10,900 --> 01:32:12,500
# Metal! #

1638
01:32:14,600 --> 01:32:16,700
# It comes from Hell! #

1639
01:33:16,700 --> 01:33:18,600
All right, man.

1640
01:33:18,600 --> 01:33:20,200
This is it.

1641
01:33:20,200 --> 01:33:24,100
Don't make a sound
unless it's a masterpiece.

1642
01:33:24,100 --> 01:33:26,400
Not a fuckin' sound.

1643
01:33:28,300 --> 01:33:29,900
Wait.

1644
01:33:29,900 --> 01:33:31,700
How will I know if it's a masterpiece?

1645
01:33:33,100 --> 01:33:34,400
You'll feel it.

1646
01:33:34,400 --> 01:33:36,700
And if you feel it,
just fuckin' lay it on me.

1647
01:33:53,300 --> 01:33:55,200
Aaah!

1648
01:33:55,300 --> 01:33:56,300
OK.

1649
01:34:10,000 --> 01:34:11,300
Thought I felt somethin'.

1650
01:34:13,800 --> 01:34:15,600
Let's hear that back.