1 00:00:35,766 --> 00:00:36,599 Run! 2 00:00:39,645 --> 00:00:41,229 Morty, do it! Hit the button now! 3 00:00:41,313 --> 00:00:42,272 I can't do it, Rick! 4 00:00:42,356 --> 00:00:43,648 They're my parents and sister! 5 00:00:43,732 --> 00:00:45,108 Morty, I already told you... it's not your family! 6 00:00:45,192 --> 00:00:47,068 They're clones from an alternate reality, 7 00:00:47,152 --> 00:00:48,736 possessed by demonic alien spirits from another 8 00:00:48,821 --> 00:00:49,904 dimension's future! 9 00:00:49,989 --> 00:00:51,364 Do you need a mnemonic device or something? 10 00:00:51,448 --> 00:00:52,657 Just hit the button, already! 11 00:00:54,159 --> 00:00:57,120 Morty, please, I love you, sweetheart. 12 00:00:57,204 --> 00:00:58,496 Oh! 13 00:01:04,920 --> 00:01:06,504 Good work, Morty. 14 00:01:06,589 --> 00:01:10,717 You know, th-th-these demonic alien spirits are really valuable. 15 00:01:10,801 --> 00:01:12,010 You okay, Morty? 16 00:01:12,094 --> 00:01:14,053 I told you not to trust that tuna. 17 00:01:14,138 --> 00:01:15,513 I just killed my family! 18 00:01:15,598 --> 00:01:16,639 I don't care what they were. 19 00:01:16,724 --> 00:01:17,849 I don't know, Morty. 20 00:01:17,933 --> 00:01:19,309 Some people'd pay top dollar for that kind of breakthrough. 21 00:01:19,393 --> 00:01:20,351 You know what, Rick? 22 00:01:20,436 --> 00:01:21,519 That's it! 23 00:01:21,604 --> 00:01:23,146 I'm done with these insane adventures! 24 00:01:23,230 --> 00:01:25,398 That was really traumatizing! I quit! I'm out! 25 00:01:25,482 --> 00:01:26,983 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 26 00:01:27,067 --> 00:01:28,901 Come on, Morty, don't... don't... don't be like that. 27 00:01:28,986 --> 00:01:30,570 The Universe is a crazy, chaotic place. 28 00:01:30,654 --> 00:01:31,946 You're the one that's crazy and chaotic! 29 00:01:32,031 --> 00:01:34,240 Adventures are supposed to be simple and fun. 30 00:01:34,325 --> 00:01:35,241 Oh, yeah, Morty, yeah. 31 00:01:35,326 --> 00:01:36,409 Yeah, that... that... that's 32 00:01:36,493 --> 00:01:38,411 real easy to say from the sidekick position. 33 00:01:38,495 --> 00:01:40,455 But... but, uh, how about next time you be in charge, 34 00:01:40,539 --> 00:01:42,540 and then we'll talk about how simple and fun it is? 35 00:01:42,625 --> 00:01:43,833 Seriously, Rick? 36 00:01:43,917 --> 00:01:45,960 Y-y-you'll... you'll let me call the shots? 37 00:01:46,045 --> 00:01:47,253 Okay, yeah, fine. 38 00:01:47,338 --> 00:01:48,713 But let's make it interesting, Morty. 39 00:01:48,797 --> 00:01:51,883 I-I-I-If your adventure sucks and we bail halfway through it, 40 00:01:51,967 --> 00:01:54,427 you lose the right to bitch about all future adventures. 41 00:01:54,511 --> 00:01:56,304 Plus, you have to do my laundry for a month. 42 00:01:56,388 --> 00:01:57,597 Okay, all right, tough guy! 43 00:01:57,681 --> 00:01:58,848 But if my adventure's good, 44 00:01:58,932 --> 00:02:00,350 I get to be in charge of every third adventure! 45 00:02:00,434 --> 00:02:01,351 Every 10th. 46 00:02:01,435 --> 00:02:02,352 Deal. All right. 47 00:02:02,436 --> 00:02:03,603 W-well, come on, let's get going. 48 00:02:03,687 --> 00:02:05,605 Dad, the dishwasher's doing that thing again. 49 00:02:05,689 --> 00:02:06,522 Washing dishes? 50 00:02:06,607 --> 00:02:07,440 No. The opposite. 51 00:02:07,524 --> 00:02:08,816 Can you fix it? 52 00:02:08,901 --> 00:02:10,485 Grandpa Rick, can you help me with my science homework? 53 00:02:10,569 --> 00:02:11,486 Yeah... j-just don't do it. 54 00:02:11,570 --> 00:02:12,862 Grandpa! 55 00:02:12,946 --> 00:02:15,823 Hey, Rick, you got some kind of hand-shaped device that can open 56 00:02:15,908 --> 00:02:16,949 this mayonnaise jar? 57 00:02:17,034 --> 00:02:18,201 Wow. Hat trick. 58 00:02:18,285 --> 00:02:19,327 All right, Morty, let's put a pin in this. 59 00:02:19,411 --> 00:02:20,620 I got to help your pathetic family. 60 00:02:20,704 --> 00:02:22,622 Oh, that sounds like something a chicken would say. 61 00:02:22,706 --> 00:02:24,540 Bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk. 62 00:02:24,625 --> 00:02:25,708 Oh, Morty, you done did it this time. 63 00:02:25,793 --> 00:02:27,168 It's on. 64 00:02:27,252 --> 00:02:29,295 I can't wait to watch your adventure lay a huge fart. 65 00:02:29,380 --> 00:02:31,047 As for you dingdongs... 66 00:02:31,882 --> 00:02:33,132 This is a Meeseeks Box. 67 00:02:33,217 --> 00:02:34,258 Let me show you how it works. 68 00:02:34,343 --> 00:02:35,218 You press this. 69 00:02:35,302 --> 00:02:37,011 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! 70 00:02:37,096 --> 00:02:38,096 Look at me! 71 00:02:38,180 --> 00:02:39,472 You make a request. 72 00:02:39,556 --> 00:02:41,474 Mr. Meeseeks, open Jerry's stupid mayonnaise jar. 73 00:02:41,558 --> 00:02:42,975 Yes, siree! 74 00:02:43,060 --> 00:02:44,519 The Meeseeks fulfills the request. 75 00:02:44,603 --> 00:02:45,895 All done! 76 00:02:45,979 --> 00:02:47,063 Wow! 77 00:02:47,147 --> 00:02:48,523 And then it stops existing. 78 00:02:48,607 --> 00:02:50,108 Oh, my God, he exploded! 79 00:02:50,192 --> 00:02:51,275 Trust me, they're fine with it. 80 00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:52,527 Knock yourselves out... 81 00:02:52,611 --> 00:02:54,320 Just keep your requests simple. 82 00:02:54,405 --> 00:02:55,279 They're not gods. 83 00:02:55,364 --> 00:02:56,489 All right! 84 00:02:56,573 --> 00:02:57,782 G-get out of here now! Everybody out of here! 85 00:02:57,866 --> 00:02:59,325 I got a bet to win! 86 00:03:00,661 --> 00:03:02,036 So many possibilities. 87 00:03:02,121 --> 00:03:03,329 My mind is racing. 88 00:03:03,414 --> 00:03:04,497 If we're gonna use this thing, 89 00:03:04,581 --> 00:03:05,790 which I'm not even sure we should, 90 00:03:05,874 --> 00:03:06,791 we need to keep it simp... 91 00:03:06,875 --> 00:03:08,251 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! 92 00:03:08,335 --> 00:03:09,377 I want to be popular at school! 93 00:03:09,461 --> 00:03:10,753 Ooh, okay! 94 00:03:10,838 --> 00:03:12,296 Summer, what did I just... 95 00:03:12,381 --> 00:03:14,340 Ooh, I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me! 96 00:03:14,425 --> 00:03:15,842 I-I-I want... I want to be a more complete woman! 97 00:03:15,926 --> 00:03:16,759 Beth! 98 00:03:16,844 --> 00:03:18,845 Oh, yeah! Yes, ma'am! 99 00:03:18,929 --> 00:03:21,389 You guys are doing it wrong. 100 00:03:21,473 --> 00:03:24,392 He said "Simple." 101 00:03:24,476 --> 00:03:26,811 Hey, there. I'm Mr. Meeseeks! 102 00:03:28,188 --> 00:03:30,064 Mr. Meeseeks, I would like to take 103 00:03:30,149 --> 00:03:31,816 two strokes off my golf game. 104 00:03:31,900 --> 00:03:35,570 Ooh, yeah! Can do! 105 00:03:35,654 --> 00:03:36,863 Nailed it. 106 00:03:36,947 --> 00:03:39,157 God, Morty, what a boring start to an adventure. 107 00:03:39,241 --> 00:03:41,534 I don't... w-w-w-why didn't we just go to Kentucky? 108 00:03:41,618 --> 00:03:43,828 Rick, this is a fantasy-type world with creatures 109 00:03:43,912 --> 00:03:45,538 and all sorts of fantasy things. 110 00:03:45,622 --> 00:03:46,956 W-we're going on a quest, okay? 111 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:49,375 Can't wait. 112 00:03:49,460 --> 00:03:51,127 Ahem. Excuse me! 113 00:03:51,211 --> 00:03:54,922 We are two humble heroes in search of adventure! 114 00:03:55,007 --> 00:03:56,215 Oh, my God, so embarrassing. 115 00:03:56,300 --> 00:03:57,884 At last! Two heroes! 116 00:03:57,968 --> 00:03:59,385 You must help us! 117 00:03:59,470 --> 00:04:02,722 This village is terribly poor, yet the giant that lives in the 118 00:04:02,806 --> 00:04:04,766 clouds above has untold treasures! 119 00:04:04,850 --> 00:04:06,225 You know what? 120 00:04:06,310 --> 00:04:09,812 I-I-I accept your call to adventure, good sir, kind sir. 121 00:04:09,897 --> 00:04:11,147 Come on, Rick. 122 00:04:11,231 --> 00:04:12,482 There's a giant in the clouds! 123 00:04:12,566 --> 00:04:13,441 Yeah. 124 00:04:13,525 --> 00:04:14,942 Beginner's luck. 125 00:04:15,027 --> 00:04:18,780 In conclusion, a friendship with Summer Smith is the most 126 00:04:18,864 --> 00:04:22,408 valuable and enriching experience of your young lives. 127 00:04:23,535 --> 00:04:24,744 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! 128 00:04:24,828 --> 00:04:26,078 Look at me! 129 00:04:26,163 --> 00:04:26,996 Thank you! 130 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:28,456 Uh, Mr. Meeseeks, was it? 131 00:04:28,540 --> 00:04:29,749 Yeah. Gene Vagina. 132 00:04:29,833 --> 00:04:32,835 Listen, I'm in a bit of custody thing with my ex and was wondering... 133 00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:34,253 No, I'll G... I'll get your info from Summer. 134 00:04:35,547 --> 00:04:37,048 I got pregnant at 17. 135 00:04:37,132 --> 00:04:39,050 I mean, I still put myself through Veterinary School. 136 00:04:39,134 --> 00:04:44,764 Yes, I'm successful, but what if I hadn't... 137 00:04:44,848 --> 00:04:48,351 I'm just saying, somewhere along the way, 138 00:04:48,435 --> 00:04:51,395 I lost that wide-eyed girl from Muskegon. 139 00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:53,481 She's still there, Beth. 140 00:04:53,565 --> 00:04:54,857 Well, her waistline isn't. 141 00:04:56,777 --> 00:04:59,403 Beth, having a family doesn't mean that you 142 00:04:59,488 --> 00:05:01,739 stop being an individual. 143 00:05:01,824 --> 00:05:02,782 You know the best thing you can 144 00:05:02,866 --> 00:05:04,951 do for people that depend on you? 145 00:05:05,035 --> 00:05:09,163 Be honest with them, even if it means setting them free. 146 00:05:09,248 --> 00:05:12,375 You're saying I should leave Jerry. 147 00:05:12,459 --> 00:05:16,963 I can't believe I'm finally having this conversation. 148 00:05:25,347 --> 00:05:26,138 More wine? 149 00:05:27,140 --> 00:05:28,516 I think I've had enough. 150 00:05:33,730 --> 00:05:36,232 Remember to square your shoulders, Jerry. 151 00:05:36,316 --> 00:05:38,025 Yeah, yeah. I got it. 152 00:05:42,614 --> 00:05:43,656 That's okay. 153 00:05:43,740 --> 00:05:45,491 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me! 154 00:05:45,576 --> 00:05:47,410 Try again and keep your head down. 155 00:05:47,494 --> 00:05:48,661 Okay, well, which is it? 156 00:05:48,745 --> 00:05:50,121 Square my shoulders or keep my head down? 157 00:05:50,205 --> 00:05:51,664 Well, it's both. 158 00:05:51,748 --> 00:05:54,417 But most importantly, you got to relax. 159 00:05:54,501 --> 00:05:55,585 You know what, Mr. Meeseeks? 160 00:05:55,669 --> 00:05:56,586 I don't think this is working. 161 00:05:56,670 --> 00:05:58,004 I give up. 162 00:05:58,088 --> 00:06:00,423 I'm sorry, Jerry, but it doesn't work like that. 163 00:06:00,507 --> 00:06:01,799 I'm Mr. Meeseeks. 164 00:06:01,884 --> 00:06:04,677 I have to fulfill my purpose so I can go away. 165 00:06:04,761 --> 00:06:05,845 Look at me. 166 00:06:05,929 --> 00:06:07,889 Well, make yourself comfortable, because I suck. 167 00:06:07,973 --> 00:06:10,850 No, Jerry, I'm the one who sucks! 168 00:06:10,934 --> 00:06:12,685 Let me try something. 169 00:06:12,769 --> 00:06:13,978 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! 170 00:06:14,062 --> 00:06:14,979 Look at me! 171 00:06:15,063 --> 00:06:15,980 Hi, Mr. Meeseeks! 172 00:06:16,064 --> 00:06:16,981 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me. 173 00:06:17,065 --> 00:06:18,482 Hi! 174 00:06:18,567 --> 00:06:20,735 Can you help me get two strokes off of Jerry's golf swing? 175 00:06:20,819 --> 00:06:22,236 Can do! 176 00:06:22,321 --> 00:06:23,738 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! 177 00:06:23,822 --> 00:06:25,531 Is he keeping his shoulders squared? 178 00:06:25,616 --> 00:06:27,325 Ooh, he's trying! 179 00:06:33,206 --> 00:06:34,457 All right, Morty. 180 00:06:34,541 --> 00:06:36,459 W-w-we're in your stupid giant's castle. 181 00:06:36,543 --> 00:06:37,501 W-what do we do next? 182 00:06:37,586 --> 00:06:38,669 Would you just relax, Rick? 183 00:06:38,754 --> 00:06:40,212 All we got to do is find the treasure room, okay? 184 00:06:40,297 --> 00:06:41,714 It's nice and simple. 185 00:06:41,798 --> 00:06:43,466 You know, I-I-I'm sorry everything's going so 186 00:06:43,550 --> 00:06:44,926 smoothly and adventurously. 187 00:06:47,596 --> 00:06:48,471 Uh-oh, Morty. 188 00:06:48,555 --> 00:06:49,722 Startin' to get a little hairy. 189 00:06:49,806 --> 00:06:50,890 What do you want to do, boss? 190 00:06:50,974 --> 00:06:51,807 Come on, hurry. 191 00:06:51,892 --> 00:06:52,934 Behind this cookie jar. 192 00:06:53,018 --> 00:06:56,604 Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum! 193 00:06:56,688 --> 00:06:58,147 Just give up, Morty. 194 00:06:58,231 --> 00:06:59,398 J-J-J... this is game over. 195 00:06:59,483 --> 00:07:00,608 I'll take us home right now. 196 00:07:00,692 --> 00:07:01,567 You just say the word. 197 00:07:01,652 --> 00:07:02,485 No way, Rick. 198 00:07:02,569 --> 00:07:03,611 This is all part of it. 199 00:07:03,695 --> 00:07:05,613 Adventures have conflict. Deal with it. 200 00:07:05,697 --> 00:07:07,865 I smell the blood of... whoop! 201 00:07:08,951 --> 00:07:09,867 Holy crap. 202 00:07:09,952 --> 00:07:10,910 Oh, boy. 203 00:07:10,994 --> 00:07:12,286 He looks pretty bad down there, Morty. 204 00:07:12,371 --> 00:07:14,497 Looks like he's bleeding out. 205 00:07:14,581 --> 00:07:16,707 Oh, Jesus! Dale! 206 00:07:16,792 --> 00:07:18,626 You sons of bitches! 207 00:07:18,710 --> 00:07:19,877 - Oh, man. - Uh-oh. 208 00:07:19,962 --> 00:07:21,212 Hello, 911? 209 00:07:21,296 --> 00:07:23,005 My husband has been attacked by tiny people! 210 00:07:23,090 --> 00:07:23,923 He's dying! 211 00:07:26,468 --> 00:07:28,094 Hey, look, we get it. 212 00:07:28,178 --> 00:07:29,512 You're little, you're down on your luck, you think, 213 00:07:29,596 --> 00:07:30,972 "Hey, he's a giant. 214 00:07:31,056 --> 00:07:32,974 Why don't we break into his home, rob him, and murder him?" 215 00:07:33,058 --> 00:07:34,892 Th-th... but that's not how it went down! 216 00:07:34,977 --> 00:07:36,686 Oh, well, it's going down like that. 217 00:07:36,770 --> 00:07:38,479 You're both going down like that. 218 00:07:38,563 --> 00:07:40,856 Ooh, boy, Morty, you're really showing me how it's done. 219 00:07:40,941 --> 00:07:42,608 Real straight forward and fun. 220 00:07:43,860 --> 00:07:46,195 Like, letting go of the need to be popular is what 221 00:07:46,279 --> 00:07:47,697 makes people like you. 222 00:07:47,781 --> 00:07:50,366 The most important love you can receive is from yourself. 223 00:07:50,450 --> 00:07:53,160 Okay, Jerry, you got to just choke up on the club! 224 00:07:53,245 --> 00:07:55,121 Well, which is it, choke up or follow-through?! 225 00:07:55,205 --> 00:07:57,623 Aww, come on, Jerry, we've been over this. 226 00:07:57,708 --> 00:07:59,291 You know you got to do both! 227 00:07:59,376 --> 00:08:01,877 This is as frustrating for us as it is for you. 228 00:08:01,962 --> 00:08:03,004 Don't tell me that! 229 00:08:03,088 --> 00:08:04,338 That just puts pressure on me! 230 00:08:04,423 --> 00:08:05,381 Just try to relax. 231 00:08:05,465 --> 00:08:06,549 You try to relax! 232 00:08:06,633 --> 00:08:08,134 Have you ever tried to relax?! 233 00:08:08,218 --> 00:08:10,094 It is a paradox! 234 00:08:11,430 --> 00:08:12,555 Ugh, these Meeseeks, huh? 235 00:08:12,639 --> 00:08:13,973 Kind of a handful. 236 00:08:14,057 --> 00:08:16,100 I can't imagine what you two must be going through. 237 00:08:16,184 --> 00:08:18,227 Our Meeseeks have been gone for hours, Jerry. 238 00:08:18,311 --> 00:08:19,562 You're kidding me. 239 00:08:19,646 --> 00:08:21,272 Notice anything different? 240 00:08:21,356 --> 00:08:22,940 I-I-I'm sorry. Hours? 241 00:08:23,025 --> 00:08:24,817 Dad, mom is a beautiful woman! 242 00:08:24,901 --> 00:08:25,985 Look at her! 243 00:08:26,069 --> 00:08:27,153 You will lose her! 244 00:08:27,237 --> 00:08:28,612 Uhh... 245 00:08:28,697 --> 00:08:31,323 Hey, Jerry, you mind if we get back to the task at hand? 246 00:08:31,408 --> 00:08:34,118 Meeseeks don't usually have to exist this long. 247 00:08:34,202 --> 00:08:36,037 It's getting weird. 248 00:08:36,121 --> 00:08:38,122 Order in the court! 249 00:08:38,206 --> 00:08:39,832 Before the jury reaches its verdict, 250 00:08:39,916 --> 00:08:44,253 I just want to say that I consider you both very guilty. 251 00:08:44,337 --> 00:08:45,421 Oh, great adventure, buddy. 252 00:08:45,505 --> 00:08:46,881 Rick and Morty go to giant prison. 253 00:08:46,965 --> 00:08:48,507 You know, if somebody drops the soap, 254 00:08:48,592 --> 00:08:50,843 it's gonna land on our heads and crush our spines, Morty. 255 00:08:50,927 --> 00:08:53,596 You know, i-i-i-it'll be really easy to rape us after that. 256 00:08:53,680 --> 00:08:54,805 We're gonna be okay, Rick. 257 00:08:54,890 --> 00:08:55,931 How? 258 00:08:56,016 --> 00:08:57,266 They took my portal gun. 259 00:08:57,350 --> 00:08:58,768 This is an open-and-shut case, Morty. 260 00:08:58,852 --> 00:09:00,394 You know, w-w-w-what do you think's gonna happen, 261 00:09:00,479 --> 00:09:02,480 some magical angel's gonna show up and then... 262 00:09:02,564 --> 00:09:03,647 Fee! Fi! Fo! Fum! 263 00:09:03,732 --> 00:09:05,483 I smell the violation of civil liberties! 264 00:09:05,567 --> 00:09:08,027 Your honor, I'm from a tiny-persons advocacy group 265 00:09:08,111 --> 00:09:11,155 and I have here in my hand a motion to dismiss. 266 00:09:11,239 --> 00:09:13,532 These little men were never read their giant rights and are 267 00:09:13,617 --> 00:09:16,535 therefore Free-fi to Fo-home. 268 00:09:16,620 --> 00:09:18,245 W-what the hell is he talking about? 269 00:09:18,330 --> 00:09:19,622 They're free to go, is what I meant. 270 00:09:19,706 --> 00:09:22,750 I-I-I'm deconstructing our... our... our thing we say. 271 00:09:22,834 --> 00:09:24,668 For giants. Nobody got that? 272 00:09:24,753 --> 00:09:25,961 Whatever. 273 00:09:26,046 --> 00:09:27,379 Oh, man, what did I tell you, Rick? 274 00:09:27,464 --> 00:09:28,881 We did it! 275 00:09:28,965 --> 00:09:31,383 All right, Morty, looks like the portal gun's still working. 276 00:09:31,468 --> 00:09:32,760 You ready to head home? 277 00:09:32,844 --> 00:09:34,011 Oh, yeah, you'd like that, wouldn't you, Rick? 278 00:09:34,096 --> 00:09:35,054 Well, you know what? 279 00:09:35,138 --> 00:09:36,430 We're not bailing out just yet. 280 00:09:36,515 --> 00:09:38,140 You know, w-we're gonna go find some treasure or... 281 00:09:38,225 --> 00:09:39,767 or something and... 282 00:09:39,851 --> 00:09:41,352 and we're gonna bring it to those villagers. 283 00:09:41,436 --> 00:09:42,770 Morty, cut your losses. 284 00:09:42,854 --> 00:09:44,188 This is obviously a wash. 285 00:09:44,272 --> 00:09:45,773 Yeah, you were saying that back... 286 00:09:45,857 --> 00:09:48,484 back w-w-w-when we first got arrested, but here we are, 287 00:09:48,568 --> 00:09:50,111 you know, walking down the courthouse steps. 288 00:09:52,739 --> 00:09:54,073 Oh, boy, Morty. 289 00:09:54,157 --> 00:09:56,200 Usually, walking down the courthouse steps is the easy 290 00:09:56,284 --> 00:09:57,535 part of the adventure. 291 00:09:57,619 --> 00:09:58,786 What do you say, Morty? 292 00:09:58,870 --> 00:10:01,122 I say give me a hand, sidekick. 293 00:10:05,168 --> 00:10:07,169 Everybody shut up! 294 00:10:07,254 --> 00:10:08,337 Let me try! 295 00:10:10,423 --> 00:10:13,259 Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! 296 00:10:13,343 --> 00:10:14,301 I'm going out. 297 00:10:14,386 --> 00:10:15,427 Wait. What? 298 00:10:15,512 --> 00:10:17,096 Well, you're busy. I'm hungry. 299 00:10:17,180 --> 00:10:18,514 I thought I'd go out. 300 00:10:18,598 --> 00:10:20,432 Do you want me to be happy or do you want me to be in prison? 301 00:10:20,517 --> 00:10:21,851 Whoa, whoa, where in the hell is... 302 00:10:21,935 --> 00:10:23,978 I'll take you to dinner. 303 00:10:25,105 --> 00:10:26,355 Hey, you know what? 304 00:10:26,439 --> 00:10:27,565 It's hard being me, too. 305 00:10:27,649 --> 00:10:29,108 I'll be right there. 306 00:10:30,443 --> 00:10:31,902 Look, I've got a marriage to keep together. 307 00:10:31,987 --> 00:10:34,864 At this point, my golf swing is more your problem than mine. 308 00:10:37,159 --> 00:10:38,576 I can't take it anymore. 309 00:10:38,660 --> 00:10:39,827 I just want to die! 310 00:10:39,911 --> 00:10:40,911 We all want to die! 311 00:10:40,996 --> 00:10:41,954 We're Meeseeks! 312 00:10:42,038 --> 00:10:43,581 Why did you even rope me into this? 313 00:10:43,665 --> 00:10:45,124 'Cause he roped me into this! 314 00:10:45,208 --> 00:10:47,543 Well, him over there, he roped me into this! 315 00:10:47,627 --> 00:10:48,961 Well, he roped me into this! 316 00:10:49,045 --> 00:10:49,962 Well, what about me? 317 00:10:50,046 --> 00:10:51,380 He... he roped me into this. 318 00:10:51,464 --> 00:10:53,048 Well, that one over there roped me into this. 319 00:10:53,133 --> 00:10:54,550 Well, he roped me into this. 320 00:10:56,261 --> 00:10:59,555 Yeah, Morty, this is the part of the story everybody loves... 321 00:10:59,639 --> 00:11:01,932 scaling down 650,000 oversized steps. 322 00:11:02,017 --> 00:11:03,475 All right, okay, y-you know, 323 00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:06,729 if this was a story, this part wouldn't be included, stupid. 324 00:11:06,813 --> 00:11:08,939 Hey, Rick, w-w-w-w-w-what do you know? 325 00:11:09,024 --> 00:11:10,399 Look down there. 326 00:11:10,483 --> 00:11:12,151 Looks like some kind of tavern or something built right into 327 00:11:12,235 --> 00:11:13,277 the side of the step. 328 00:11:14,946 --> 00:11:16,197 Oh, wow, Rick. 329 00:11:16,281 --> 00:11:17,990 Now, this is more like it. 330 00:11:18,074 --> 00:11:20,534 Look, there's little staircase-shaped people in here. 331 00:11:20,619 --> 00:11:22,453 A-all kinds of crazy characters. 332 00:11:22,537 --> 00:11:24,663 This place is great, you know? 333 00:11:24,748 --> 00:11:26,457 It's whimsical and fun. 334 00:11:26,541 --> 00:11:30,502 - What are you looking at, motherfucker? - Easy, Rick. 335 00:11:30,587 --> 00:11:31,712 Pay them no mind. 336 00:11:31,796 --> 00:11:33,589 Those Stair Goblins can be moody. 337 00:11:33,673 --> 00:11:35,507 Now, what can I getcha? 338 00:11:35,592 --> 00:11:42,806 We've got Skarlog Poppies, Flurlow, Halzingers, Bloogies, 339 00:11:42,891 --> 00:11:44,058 Juicy Time Babies. 340 00:11:44,142 --> 00:11:45,893 Yeah, yeah, yeah, h-how about some scotch whiskey? 341 00:11:45,977 --> 00:11:47,102 You got any of that around here? 342 00:11:47,187 --> 00:11:48,229 Or just a bunch of nonsense words? 343 00:11:48,313 --> 00:11:49,313 Rick. 344 00:11:49,397 --> 00:11:50,814 We'll have two Bloogies, please. 345 00:11:50,899 --> 00:11:54,235 And, uh, we were wondering, is there a faster way two heroes 346 00:11:54,319 --> 00:11:55,611 could get down these stairs? 347 00:11:55,695 --> 00:11:57,529 Y'all need to ride down the stairs? 348 00:11:57,614 --> 00:12:01,617 My name is Slippely-Slippery Stair. 349 00:12:01,701 --> 00:12:04,703 I'll take you down there for 25 shmeckels. 350 00:12:04,788 --> 00:12:06,205 25 shmeckels? 351 00:12:06,289 --> 00:12:07,790 I-I-I don't know how much... I don't know what that is. 352 00:12:07,874 --> 00:12:09,083 Is that a lot? Is it a little? 353 00:12:09,167 --> 00:12:12,044 That's exactly how much I spent on my big fake boobies. 354 00:12:12,128 --> 00:12:13,420 Hi, I'm Mr. Booby Buyer. 355 00:12:13,505 --> 00:12:15,339 I'll buy those boobies for 25 shmeckels. 356 00:12:15,423 --> 00:12:18,342 It's a tempting offer, but I'm gonna have to decline. 357 00:12:18,426 --> 00:12:19,927 Rats! What a shame. 358 00:12:20,011 --> 00:12:22,471 Morty, your adventure's in a spiral. 359 00:12:22,555 --> 00:12:24,014 For real, man, time to pull out. 360 00:12:24,099 --> 00:12:25,474 You keep heckling my adventure, Rick! 361 00:12:25,558 --> 00:12:26,517 You know why? 362 00:12:26,601 --> 00:12:27,559 Uh, because it's lame? 363 00:12:27,644 --> 00:12:28,769 It's because you're petty! 364 00:12:28,853 --> 00:12:30,104 You know, h-how many times have 365 00:12:30,188 --> 00:12:33,065 I had to follow you into some nonsensical bull crap? 366 00:12:33,149 --> 00:12:34,775 I always roll with the punches, Rick. 367 00:12:34,859 --> 00:12:36,068 Why can't you? 368 00:12:36,152 --> 00:12:38,070 Look, I got to take a leak, and when I come back, 369 00:12:38,154 --> 00:12:41,156 i-if you haven't learned how to lighten up, don't be here! 370 00:12:41,241 --> 00:12:42,950 Whatever. 371 00:12:43,034 --> 00:12:45,244 It's become clear... look at me... 372 00:12:45,328 --> 00:12:47,997 that if we concentrate all our efforts on Jerry's 373 00:12:48,081 --> 00:12:50,916 follow-through, we will solve this problem. 374 00:12:51,001 --> 00:12:52,084 I'm Mr. Meeseeks. 375 00:12:52,168 --> 00:12:53,627 I'm Mr. Meeseeks. Look at me. 376 00:12:53,712 --> 00:12:56,130 The only thing that's clear is that choking up is 377 00:12:56,214 --> 00:12:57,548 the one true solution. 378 00:12:57,632 --> 00:12:59,341 Look at me. I'm Mr. Meeseeks. 379 00:12:59,426 --> 00:13:01,969 I've been trying to help Jerry for two days, 380 00:13:02,053 --> 00:13:05,139 an eternity in Meeseeks time, and nothing's worked. 381 00:13:05,223 --> 00:13:06,598 I fear the worst. 382 00:13:06,683 --> 00:13:09,101 Your failures are your own, old man. 383 00:13:09,185 --> 00:13:10,936 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me. 384 00:13:11,021 --> 00:13:12,730 I say follow-through! 385 00:13:12,814 --> 00:13:13,939 Who's with me?! 386 00:13:15,608 --> 00:13:17,401 I'm Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me! 387 00:13:17,485 --> 00:13:18,527 Kill him! 388 00:13:24,492 --> 00:13:25,743 How are you today? 389 00:13:25,827 --> 00:13:27,411 I'm Mr. Jelly Bean. 390 00:13:27,495 --> 00:13:28,454 Hi, Mr. Jelly Bean. 391 00:13:28,538 --> 00:13:29,621 I'm Morty. 392 00:13:29,706 --> 00:13:31,123 My grandpa and I are on an adventure. 393 00:13:31,207 --> 00:13:32,958 Nice. Is it a fun adventure? 394 00:13:33,043 --> 00:13:34,543 I hope so. 395 00:13:34,627 --> 00:13:36,420 But I'm starting to get nervous that maybe it's gone a little 396 00:13:36,504 --> 00:13:37,629 too far off the rails. 397 00:13:37,714 --> 00:13:39,882 Isn't that what adventures do? 398 00:13:39,966 --> 00:13:41,216 Hey, y-you know what? 399 00:13:41,301 --> 00:13:42,301 You're right. 400 00:13:42,385 --> 00:13:43,552 Everything's going fine. 401 00:13:43,636 --> 00:13:46,138 I just got to relax and go with the flow. 402 00:13:46,222 --> 00:13:48,474 Yeah. 403 00:13:48,558 --> 00:13:50,559 O-o-okay. Uh. B-bye. 404 00:13:50,643 --> 00:13:52,436 Uhh, no, stay. 405 00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:53,645 Go with the flow. 406 00:13:53,730 --> 00:13:54,980 Stop. 407 00:13:55,065 --> 00:13:56,357 Y-y-you're making me really uncomfortable. 408 00:13:56,441 --> 00:13:58,275 Stop fighting me. 409 00:13:59,486 --> 00:14:01,111 - Just let this happen. - Get off of me! 410 00:14:01,196 --> 00:14:03,655 ♪ Sweet home Alabama ♪ 411 00:14:03,740 --> 00:14:04,573 Whoo! 412 00:14:05,992 --> 00:14:08,160 No! Stop! Please! 413 00:14:08,244 --> 00:14:11,497 Stop being such a fucking tease, you sweet little twat. 414 00:14:21,758 --> 00:14:23,926 No! No! 415 00:14:25,011 --> 00:14:25,803 Ow! 416 00:14:39,234 --> 00:14:40,651 Everybody sto-o-o-p! 417 00:14:40,735 --> 00:14:41,985 Look at me! 418 00:14:42,070 --> 00:14:44,863 My brothers, nothing will be accomplished by shedding 419 00:14:44,948 --> 00:14:46,281 Meeseeks blood. 420 00:14:46,366 --> 00:14:49,243 None of us can die until our job is done. 421 00:14:49,327 --> 00:14:50,619 The job can't be done! 422 00:14:50,703 --> 00:14:52,496 We'll never get two strokes off his game! 423 00:14:52,580 --> 00:14:53,831 No, we won't. 424 00:14:53,915 --> 00:14:56,834 But we will get all strokes off his game. 425 00:14:56,918 --> 00:14:58,419 Where's he going with this? 426 00:14:58,503 --> 00:14:59,503 What's he mean? 427 00:14:59,587 --> 00:15:01,171 When we kill him. 428 00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:07,052 Jerry, maybe it's time I take that trip I always talk about. 429 00:15:07,137 --> 00:15:08,512 Where would you go? 430 00:15:08,596 --> 00:15:09,721 I don't know, man. 431 00:15:09,806 --> 00:15:12,391 Italy. Greece. Argentina. 432 00:15:12,475 --> 00:15:15,894 Countries known for their sexually aggressive men. 433 00:15:17,730 --> 00:15:19,857 Did I tell you how much I love your new haircut? 434 00:15:21,317 --> 00:15:22,484 What the heck? 435 00:15:22,569 --> 00:15:24,153 There he is! 436 00:15:27,615 --> 00:15:28,532 Run, Jerry! 437 00:15:28,616 --> 00:15:30,576 Aah! 438 00:15:32,203 --> 00:15:33,620 Come on out, Jerry! 439 00:15:33,705 --> 00:15:34,580 Guys, I'll choke up. 440 00:15:34,664 --> 00:15:35,831 I'll follow through. 441 00:15:35,915 --> 00:15:37,082 I'll do whatever you tell me to do, okay? 442 00:15:37,167 --> 00:15:39,793 Oh, we're well past that, Jerry. 443 00:15:39,878 --> 00:15:43,797 Come on, Rick, quit sk... stalling. 444 00:15:43,882 --> 00:15:46,258 What do ya got? 445 00:15:46,342 --> 00:15:47,676 Read 'em and weep, fellas! 446 00:15:47,760 --> 00:15:48,594 Aw! 447 00:15:48,678 --> 00:15:50,137 Oh, hey, Morty. 448 00:15:50,221 --> 00:15:51,972 Listen, I'm really sorry about all that stuff I said earlier 449 00:15:52,056 --> 00:15:53,223 about your adventure. 450 00:15:53,308 --> 00:15:54,850 I-I-I'm havin' a good time, Morty. 451 00:15:54,934 --> 00:15:55,934 It's not so bad. 452 00:15:56,019 --> 00:15:57,019 Let's just go home, okay? 453 00:15:57,103 --> 00:15:57,895 I'm calling it. 454 00:15:57,979 --> 00:15:59,146 The adventure's over. 455 00:15:59,230 --> 00:16:00,647 We can't leave now, Morty. I'm on fire! 456 00:16:00,732 --> 00:16:01,690 Look, I want to leave now. 457 00:16:01,774 --> 00:16:03,150 You win the bet, okay? 458 00:16:03,234 --> 00:16:05,027 Just give me the portal gun and let's go, please. 459 00:16:06,613 --> 00:16:10,949 Please, I just want to go home. Okay. 460 00:16:11,034 --> 00:16:11,992 Listen, Morty. 461 00:16:12,076 --> 00:16:13,577 I just won a bunch of shmeckels. 462 00:16:13,661 --> 00:16:16,121 Why don't we use 25 of them to pay slippery stair here for a 463 00:16:16,206 --> 00:16:18,415 ride back to the village, and then we'll give the rest of the 464 00:16:18,500 --> 00:16:19,666 shmeckels to the villagers, huh? 465 00:16:19,751 --> 00:16:21,293 Really? 466 00:16:21,377 --> 00:16:22,544 Sure, Morty. Yeah. 467 00:16:22,629 --> 00:16:24,046 You know, a good adventure needs a good ending. 468 00:16:26,508 --> 00:16:28,133 Buckle up! 469 00:16:32,013 --> 00:16:35,474 Meeseeks are not born into this world fumbling for meaning, 470 00:16:35,558 --> 00:16:36,850 Jerry! 471 00:16:36,935 --> 00:16:40,354 We are created to serve a singular purpose for which 472 00:16:40,438 --> 00:16:42,606 we will go to any lengths to fulfill! 473 00:16:42,690 --> 00:16:45,567 Existence is pain to a Meeseeks, Jerry. 474 00:16:45,652 --> 00:16:48,403 And we will do anything to alleviate that pain. 475 00:16:48,488 --> 00:16:49,488 Just ask... - Aah! 476 00:16:49,572 --> 00:16:51,281 ...what's your name, ma'am? 477 00:16:51,366 --> 00:16:53,492 S-Samantha. Please, mister! 478 00:16:53,576 --> 00:16:55,244 Give him what he wants! 479 00:16:55,328 --> 00:16:58,872 Innocent people are going to die because of me. 480 00:16:58,957 --> 00:17:01,708 Why am I so mediocre? 481 00:17:03,586 --> 00:17:04,878 Jerry, turn around. 482 00:17:04,963 --> 00:17:06,046 Straighten your back. 483 00:17:06,130 --> 00:17:07,047 Bend your knees. 484 00:17:07,131 --> 00:17:08,006 Bend them. 485 00:17:08,091 --> 00:17:09,299 Square your shoulders. 486 00:17:09,384 --> 00:17:11,760 Take a deep breath. 487 00:17:11,844 --> 00:17:14,638 I love you. 488 00:17:14,722 --> 00:17:16,515 I'm counting to three, Jerry. 489 00:17:31,489 --> 00:17:33,740 What the fuck is going on? 490 00:17:35,201 --> 00:17:37,077 He's got it! 491 00:17:37,161 --> 00:17:38,245 Th-th-that's a lower handicap stro-o-ke! 492 00:17:42,584 --> 00:17:43,709 Excuse me. 493 00:17:43,793 --> 00:17:45,377 I'm a bit of a stickler Meeseeks. 494 00:17:45,461 --> 00:17:47,588 What about your short game? 495 00:17:47,672 --> 00:17:49,881 Oh, my god, oh, my god! 496 00:17:49,966 --> 00:17:52,759 What about your short game?! 497 00:17:58,725 --> 00:18:00,142 Ooh, nice! 498 00:18:04,981 --> 00:18:06,815 I think we'll take our food to go. 499 00:18:06,899 --> 00:18:07,733 No, you won't. 500 00:18:07,817 --> 00:18:08,817 The police are coming. 501 00:18:08,901 --> 00:18:10,402 You have so many questions to answer. 502 00:18:10,486 --> 00:18:11,695 Fair enough. 503 00:18:17,827 --> 00:18:19,119 Thank you, kind sir. 504 00:18:19,203 --> 00:18:20,579 Our village is saved! 505 00:18:20,663 --> 00:18:22,414 You are both true heroes! 506 00:18:22,498 --> 00:18:25,917 Oh! 507 00:18:26,002 --> 00:18:27,002 Good job, Morty. 508 00:18:27,086 --> 00:18:28,587 Looks like you won the bet. 509 00:18:28,671 --> 00:18:30,839 Thanks, Rick, but I don't know if I should. 510 00:18:30,923 --> 00:18:32,424 You know, you were right about the Universe. 511 00:18:32,508 --> 00:18:34,426 It's a crazy and chaotic place. 512 00:18:34,510 --> 00:18:36,303 Well, you know, maybe that's why it could use a little 513 00:18:36,387 --> 00:18:38,305 cleaning up every now and then, you know. 514 00:18:38,389 --> 00:18:40,349 This one's wrapped up neat and clean because we did it 515 00:18:40,433 --> 00:18:41,767 Morty style. 516 00:18:41,851 --> 00:18:45,187 Oh! Heroes, we would like to introduce you to our beloved 517 00:18:45,271 --> 00:18:47,814 King so that he may thank you personally. 518 00:18:47,899 --> 00:18:49,858 Uh, no, i-it's cool. 519 00:18:49,942 --> 00:18:51,443 Rick. Portal. Hurry. 520 00:18:57,825 --> 00:18:59,743 Aah! 521 00:19:05,208 --> 00:19:06,625 So... 522 00:19:06,709 --> 00:19:08,669 you still thinking about taking that trip? 523 00:19:08,753 --> 00:19:10,337 Jerry, look. 524 00:19:10,421 --> 00:19:11,880 We don't have a perfect marriage, 525 00:19:11,964 --> 00:19:13,465 but I'm not going anywhere. 526 00:19:13,549 --> 00:19:14,966 When we were in that freezer, 527 00:19:15,051 --> 00:19:17,469 I realized the Meeseeks are like the guys I went to High School with... 528 00:19:17,553 --> 00:19:21,056 willing to say anything to "complete their task." 529 00:19:21,140 --> 00:19:22,683 Was I one of those guys? 530 00:19:22,767 --> 00:19:25,894 The difference is you didn't disappear afterwards. 531 00:19:25,978 --> 00:19:27,187 Well... 532 00:19:27,271 --> 00:19:28,563 I got you pregnant. 533 00:19:28,648 --> 00:19:30,482 Yeah... 534 00:19:30,566 --> 00:19:32,234 What the hell happened to this place? 535 00:19:32,318 --> 00:19:33,860 Uh, your Meeseeks Box happened. 536 00:19:33,945 --> 00:19:36,196 They went crazy when they couldn't take two strokes off 537 00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:37,239 Jerry's golf game. 538 00:19:37,323 --> 00:19:38,573 He felt terrible. 539 00:19:38,658 --> 00:19:40,492 Hey, it's not my fault that Jerry's an idiot. 540 00:19:40,576 --> 00:19:41,827 Dad! 541 00:19:41,911 --> 00:19:43,620 Is there anything you can do to clean this place up? 542 00:19:43,705 --> 00:19:45,622 Well, you know, I do have a fleeseeks box. 543 00:19:45,707 --> 00:19:47,290 No. No more boxes. 544 00:19:47,375 --> 00:19:48,500 What? 545 00:19:48,584 --> 00:19:49,876 It just has a mop and some floor wax in it. 546 00:19:49,961 --> 00:19:51,920 Wubba lubba dub dubs! 547 00:19:53,256 --> 00:19:54,339 Yeah! That's my new thing! 548 00:19:54,424 --> 00:19:55,340 I'm kind of like what's his name... 549 00:19:55,425 --> 00:19:56,758 Ar-Arsenio. 550 00:19:56,843 --> 00:19:58,927 Isn't that... it's what Arsenio used to say on his show. 551 00:19:59,011 --> 00:20:00,804 Wobble gobba lop bops! Right? 552 00:20:00,888 --> 00:20:01,763 See you next week, everybody. 553 00:20:01,848 --> 00:20:02,848 I don't get it. 554 00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:38,341 Sir, I think you're going to want to see this. 555 00:20:38,426 --> 00:20:42,179 We found it inside a lockbox inside King Jelly Bean's closet. 556 00:20:43,514 --> 00:20:44,431 We have to tell the people. 557 00:20:44,515 --> 00:20:46,892 Wait. 558 00:20:46,976 --> 00:20:48,310 Destroy it. 559 00:20:54,108 --> 00:20:57,861 Our people will get more from the idea he represented than 560 00:20:57,945 --> 00:20:59,905 from the Jelly Bean he actually was. 561 00:21:01,991 --> 00:21:03,450 Did you get any of that? 562 00:21:03,534 --> 00:21:05,368 It's a good-a show! 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net