1 00:00:00,051 --> 00:00:01,885 ♪ Love ♪ 2 00:00:01,919 --> 00:00:03,586 ♪ Connection ♪ 3 00:00:03,621 --> 00:00:05,722 ♪ Experience ♪ 4 00:00:05,756 --> 00:00:07,357 Yeah, Morty. 5 00:00:07,391 --> 00:00:09,659 ♪ Come together ♪ 6 00:00:09,693 --> 00:00:12,896 ♪ With love, connection, and experience ♪ 7 00:00:12,930 --> 00:00:14,964 - It's my favorite song. - Oh, yeah. 8 00:00:14,999 --> 00:00:18,401 Oh, yeah, distress beacon! 9 00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:19,736 Yeah, baby! 10 00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:21,004 You're excited about that? 11 00:00:21,038 --> 00:00:22,639 The first rule of space travel, kids, 12 00:00:22,673 --> 00:00:24,240 is always check out distress beacons. 13 00:00:24,275 --> 00:00:26,576 9 out of 10 times, it's a ship full of dead aliens 14 00:00:26,610 --> 00:00:28,244 and a bunch of free shit! 15 00:00:28,279 --> 00:00:28,854 Whoa! 16 00:00:28,879 --> 00:00:30,580 1 out of 10 times, it's a deadly trap, 17 00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:32,849 but I'm ready to roll those dice. 18 00:00:32,883 --> 00:00:36,085 ♪ ♪ 19 00:00:40,157 --> 00:00:42,559 Seems like something terrible happened here. 20 00:00:42,593 --> 00:00:43,793 Yep. Cha-ching. 21 00:00:43,827 --> 00:00:47,463 Oh, yeah, if you find a room full of eggs, don't shy away from it. 22 00:00:47,498 --> 00:00:48,932 Give one of them a shake. 23 00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:50,933 Those facehuggers are worth more than this ship. 24 00:00:50,968 --> 00:00:51,821 Uh, what's that? 25 00:00:51,846 --> 00:00:54,237 This'll make the cops write it up as a looting by the korblocks. 26 00:00:54,271 --> 00:00:57,607 - That's horrible. - I hear you, man. Cops are racist. 27 00:00:57,641 --> 00:01:00,610 Oh, hey. You're alive. Thank god. 28 00:01:00,644 --> 00:01:01,945 Can you help us? 29 00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:04,914 Our planet was taken over by some kind of... entity. 30 00:01:04,949 --> 00:01:06,716 It absorbed the minds of our people. 31 00:01:06,750 --> 00:01:08,585 We didn't notice until it was too late. 32 00:01:08,619 --> 00:01:11,187 The people it takes over, they look like your friends, 33 00:01:11,222 --> 00:01:15,491 your family, your leaders, but they're not themselves anymore. 34 00:01:15,526 --> 00:01:17,794 They're part of... it. 35 00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:19,963 Then how do you know it didn't get on the ship with you? 36 00:01:19,997 --> 00:01:22,498 Those two dingdongs seem pretty calm about the whole thing. 37 00:01:23,867 --> 00:01:25,935 Hey, no! No, wait! Stop! 38 00:01:27,638 --> 00:01:28,605 Called it. 39 00:01:31,008 --> 00:01:32,342 Hello, Rick. 40 00:01:32,376 --> 00:01:33,810 Long time no see. 41 00:01:33,844 --> 00:01:34,677 Unity? 42 00:01:34,712 --> 00:01:35,678 - Rick? - Grandpa? 43 00:01:35,713 --> 00:01:37,080 Oh, boy. Uh... 44 00:01:37,114 --> 00:01:39,082 These are my grandkids, Summer and Morty. 45 00:01:39,116 --> 00:01:40,950 Summer, Morty, this is, uh, Unity. 46 00:01:40,985 --> 00:01:44,821 We sort of used to, uh... date. 47 00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:48,057 ♪ ♪ 48 00:01:48,081 --> 00:01:54,181 Sync and corrections by XhmikosR www.addic7ed.com 49 00:02:34,677 --> 00:02:36,945 Quite an operation you got going here, Une. 50 00:02:36,979 --> 00:02:38,513 You're a whole planet now, huh? 51 00:02:38,548 --> 00:02:41,616 After we broke up, I spent some time wandering through space. 52 00:02:41,651 --> 00:02:44,085 - Then I found this world... - ...Where I was better able 53 00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:46,221 to focus on my passion for unification. 54 00:02:46,255 --> 00:02:49,324 - You mean stealing people's bodies? - Summer, rude. 55 00:02:49,358 --> 00:02:51,826 Why don't you two kids go run off and play with Unity 56 00:02:51,861 --> 00:02:53,562 while Unity and I do some catching up. 57 00:02:53,596 --> 00:02:55,197 - Ugh. - No, wait, Rick, 58 00:02:55,231 --> 00:02:57,432 aren't these people gonna barf into our mouths and absorb us? 59 00:02:57,466 --> 00:03:00,502 You're guests here on my planet. You're free to be yourselves. 60 00:03:00,536 --> 00:03:02,837 I've never been any good at disappointing Rick. 61 00:03:02,872 --> 00:03:04,239 Well, now I'm going to barf. 62 00:03:04,273 --> 00:03:06,107 Come on, Morty. 63 00:03:09,278 --> 00:03:11,813 Jerry, what are you what are you doing in here? 64 00:03:11,847 --> 00:03:14,683 I'm trying to find our weed whacker, 65 00:03:14,717 --> 00:03:16,918 'cause our weeds are wack, yo. 66 00:03:16,953 --> 00:03:19,379 But you can't go in the garage when Rick's not here. 67 00:03:19,404 --> 00:03:21,206 - I "can't"? - Well, he doesn't like it. 68 00:03:21,232 --> 00:03:24,426 What's he gonna do? Crash rent-free at his other family's house? 69 00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:25,961 What is that supposed to mean? 70 00:03:25,995 --> 00:03:29,497 Your dad gets to walk all over us because of your abandonment issues. 71 00:03:29,532 --> 00:03:31,433 He's playing you, shorty. 72 00:03:31,467 --> 00:03:33,802 Oh, stop affecting that stupid hip-hop dialect. 73 00:03:33,836 --> 00:03:36,271 Stop shifting the cross hairs to my ironic urban patois 74 00:03:36,305 --> 00:03:38,873 just because your relationship with your father 75 00:03:38,908 --> 00:03:40,508 is to' up from the flo' up. 76 00:03:42,678 --> 00:03:43,778 What the hell was that? 77 00:03:43,813 --> 00:03:45,280 I don't know. Let's just leave. 78 00:03:48,117 --> 00:03:49,117 That is a hatch. 79 00:03:49,151 --> 00:03:51,519 Your father put a hatch in my garage. 80 00:03:51,554 --> 00:03:52,988 You don't know it was him. 81 00:03:53,022 --> 00:03:54,789 Anyway, we're not supposed to be in here. 82 00:03:54,824 --> 00:03:58,193 Obviously, neither is whatever's gurgling down there. 83 00:04:01,964 --> 00:04:04,366 "World peace achieved." Nice. 84 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:07,168 Little weird to publish a paper about it for yourself, but hey. 85 00:04:07,203 --> 00:04:08,336 So, what's next? 86 00:04:08,371 --> 00:04:10,272 After I become a type-one civilization, 87 00:04:10,306 --> 00:04:13,575 this world will be invited into the galactic federation. 88 00:04:13,609 --> 00:04:14,709 Oh, goody. 89 00:04:14,744 --> 00:04:17,979 From there, I'll have access to countless planets and species. 90 00:04:18,014 --> 00:04:21,116 One by one, I will unify them, I will become the universe, 91 00:04:21,150 --> 00:04:24,386 and I will be what the single-minded once called the God. 92 00:04:24,420 --> 00:04:25,787 I like that. 93 00:04:25,821 --> 00:04:27,289 Oh, that's pretty sexy. 94 00:04:27,323 --> 00:04:29,257 Hey, listen, where can we get a drink around here? 95 00:04:29,292 --> 00:04:31,493 Recreational substances were phased out here. 96 00:04:31,527 --> 00:04:35,063 There's no need for escape from the self when your world is one. 97 00:04:35,097 --> 00:04:36,564 Unity, Unity, who am I talking to? 98 00:04:36,599 --> 00:04:38,767 I watched you assimilate a whole police station 99 00:04:38,801 --> 00:04:41,002 just to get your hands on the evidence locker. 100 00:04:41,037 --> 00:04:43,471 Rick, when we met, I was a young hive mind 101 00:04:43,506 --> 00:04:45,640 with the population of a small town. 102 00:04:45,675 --> 00:04:47,609 People change... 103 00:04:47,643 --> 00:04:48,943 Especially when I change them. 104 00:04:48,978 --> 00:04:51,946 I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I've grown. 105 00:04:51,981 --> 00:04:54,049 Hey, listen, I've grown, too. 106 00:04:54,083 --> 00:04:55,383 I have! 107 00:04:55,418 --> 00:04:57,452 See, I've I've reconnected with my family, right? 108 00:04:57,486 --> 00:04:58,987 Hm. Why's that, I wonder? 109 00:04:59,021 --> 00:05:00,722 Maybe it's part of getting old. 110 00:05:00,756 --> 00:05:04,626 Maybe I just missed being with a collective. 111 00:05:06,162 --> 00:05:07,662 Yes, Rick. Yes. 112 00:05:07,697 --> 00:05:09,297 Oh, yeah. Yes. Yes. 113 00:05:09,332 --> 00:05:11,399 Wait, wait. Stop. Hold it. 114 00:05:11,434 --> 00:05:12,500 Not like this. 115 00:05:12,535 --> 00:05:15,337 We need a hang glider and a crotchless uncle Sam costume, 116 00:05:15,371 --> 00:05:17,539 and I want the entire field of your largest stadium 117 00:05:17,573 --> 00:05:19,474 covered end to end with naked redheads, 118 00:05:19,508 --> 00:05:20,842 and I want the stands packed 119 00:05:20,876 --> 00:05:23,478 with every man that remotely resembles my father. 120 00:05:29,251 --> 00:05:31,319 Man, look at them go. So coordinated. 121 00:05:31,354 --> 00:05:33,088 What's your problem? 122 00:05:33,122 --> 00:05:35,590 They're making you into a Mount Rushmore. 123 00:05:35,624 --> 00:05:36,624 They made burgers! 124 00:05:36,659 --> 00:05:39,294 Morty, open your eyes. There is no "they". 125 00:05:39,328 --> 00:05:41,796 These poor people's bodies are being used. 126 00:05:41,831 --> 00:05:42,897 They're a planet of puppets. 127 00:05:42,932 --> 00:05:44,466 - I can hear you. - Ugh. 128 00:05:44,500 --> 00:05:46,701 Well, it seems like everybody here's cool with it. 129 00:05:46,736 --> 00:05:48,169 Except for all those redheads. 130 00:05:48,204 --> 00:05:51,239 They seem like they're in a hurry to be somewhere else. 131 00:05:51,273 --> 00:05:53,308 Balloon, Summer? Balloon, Morty? 132 00:05:53,342 --> 00:05:55,343 No, we don't want your dumb balloons, okay? 133 00:05:55,378 --> 00:05:56,945 We're bored. Take us back to Rick. 134 00:05:56,979 --> 00:05:58,446 Now's not a good time. 135 00:05:59,759 --> 00:06:01,826 Oh, yeah! 136 00:06:01,861 --> 00:06:04,696 I want yooooooou! 137 00:06:04,730 --> 00:06:05,997 Go, son, go! 138 00:06:06,031 --> 00:06:09,067 Go, son, go! Go, son, go! 139 00:06:09,101 --> 00:06:12,804 Oh, real nice. Real nice. 140 00:06:12,838 --> 00:06:14,839 How does a man do this without me noticing? 141 00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:17,208 Oh, you know my dad once he puts his mind to something. 142 00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:18,910 You're spinning this to his credit? 143 00:06:20,679 --> 00:06:22,080 I'm going down there. 144 00:06:22,114 --> 00:06:24,015 - Jerry-- - Beth, this is my house, 145 00:06:24,049 --> 00:06:26,184 which makes this my garage, my secret hatch, 146 00:06:26,218 --> 00:06:29,153 my hidden subterranean lair, and my faceless gargler. 147 00:06:29,188 --> 00:06:31,022 Now, are you gonna keep hating this playa 148 00:06:31,056 --> 00:06:32,690 or are you gonna jack my steez? 149 00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:34,726 Okay, you're just making stuff up now. 150 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:36,761 Ugh. Oh, my god. 151 00:06:36,796 --> 00:06:38,062 Oh, my god. 152 00:06:38,097 --> 00:06:39,798 Ugh! 153 00:06:39,832 --> 00:06:42,000 Oh, Rick. That was so bad. 154 00:06:42,034 --> 00:06:43,835 What's this "was" stuff? 155 00:06:43,869 --> 00:06:45,470 I just need to hydrate, 156 00:06:45,504 --> 00:06:47,372 then we're doing that again. 157 00:06:47,406 --> 00:06:49,674 - Oh, damn. - Listen, if this is an invasion, 158 00:06:49,708 --> 00:06:51,075 I got to sit this one out, 159 00:06:51,110 --> 00:06:53,077 but I'll be back to have sex with the survivors. 160 00:06:53,112 --> 00:06:55,647 It's a neighboring hive-mind species, beta seven. 161 00:06:55,681 --> 00:06:57,715 Our planets maintain a practical alliance 162 00:06:57,750 --> 00:07:01,753 for exchange of vital resources, so be nice. 163 00:07:01,787 --> 00:07:05,156 Unity, is it a bad time? 164 00:07:05,191 --> 00:07:09,194 Are all present life forms assimilated? 165 00:07:09,228 --> 00:07:13,331 Beta seven, this is my single-minded friend from Earth, Rick. 166 00:07:13,365 --> 00:07:15,834 Rick Sanchez. 167 00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:17,035 Unity has spoken of you. 168 00:07:17,069 --> 00:07:18,837 All bad, I hope. Ha ha! 169 00:07:18,871 --> 00:07:20,238 Bleeeeeeeeeh! 170 00:07:20,272 --> 00:07:21,506 Oh, Jesus Christ. 171 00:07:21,540 --> 00:07:24,209 Beta seven, if my allies are a problem for you, 172 00:07:24,243 --> 00:07:26,110 perhaps our alliance is, as well. 173 00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:27,712 Our alliance is beneficial. 174 00:07:27,746 --> 00:07:31,616 When beta seven expresses concern, it's only because-- 175 00:07:31,650 --> 00:07:34,185 Oh, snap! Powdered neutronium? 176 00:07:34,220 --> 00:07:35,520 Amphetetron? 177 00:07:35,554 --> 00:07:37,021 You know I can make with this stuff? 178 00:07:37,056 --> 00:07:39,257 Oh, Rick, I-- I shouldn't. 179 00:07:39,291 --> 00:07:41,192 Come on. It's not every day that I'm town. 180 00:07:41,227 --> 00:07:43,094 It's for old time's sake. 181 00:07:43,128 --> 00:07:45,530 Uh... Okay, what the hell. 182 00:07:45,564 --> 00:07:48,333 We can purify the resin and make fractal dust. 183 00:07:48,367 --> 00:07:50,835 Oh, I was thinking velocitinis, but-- 184 00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:53,938 Aw, old man Rick can't party with a whole planet? 185 00:07:55,708 --> 00:07:59,143 I can do whatever you do and more, baby. 186 00:08:00,613 --> 00:08:03,114 You know, I think beta seven over there 187 00:08:03,148 --> 00:08:05,650 is hoping your alliance can be more than practical. 188 00:08:05,684 --> 00:08:07,185 Stop. 189 00:08:11,023 --> 00:08:15,293 Well, this explains the $6,000 electric bill. 190 00:08:16,762 --> 00:08:17,929 Whoa! 191 00:08:20,099 --> 00:08:23,301 Well, nice. Real nice. 192 00:08:23,335 --> 00:08:24,903 Alien prisoners under the house. 193 00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:26,704 Real nice. 194 00:08:26,739 --> 00:08:29,374 Nice. Reeeeeeeeeeeeeal-- 195 00:08:29,408 --> 00:08:30,708 God damn it, stop. 196 00:08:30,743 --> 00:08:33,478 Wake up, people! You have to fight it! 197 00:08:33,512 --> 00:08:36,381 You're under the spell of an evil monster! 198 00:08:36,415 --> 00:08:39,317 - I can hear you. - Yeah, so you keep saying. 199 00:08:40,719 --> 00:08:42,287 - Summer! - Wake up! 200 00:08:42,321 --> 00:08:44,622 You have to have some individuality left in there! 201 00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:46,558 Why do you hate me, Summer? 202 00:08:46,592 --> 00:08:47,992 I'm not talking you. 203 00:08:48,027 --> 00:08:50,662 I'm talking to... Steven Phillips. 204 00:08:50,696 --> 00:08:53,097 Steven, set yourself free. 205 00:08:53,132 --> 00:08:55,567 Summer, before I took over this planet, 206 00:08:55,601 --> 00:08:58,002 this man was a registered sex offender. 207 00:08:58,037 --> 00:09:00,705 Yeah? Well, so what? At least he was himself. 208 00:09:00,739 --> 00:09:03,908 This woman was a drug addict on the verge of suicide. 209 00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:05,677 Now she's a marine biologist. 210 00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:07,745 Listen, Unity, I don't think my sister's trying to say 211 00:09:07,780 --> 00:09:09,213 that life would be perfect without you. 212 00:09:09,248 --> 00:09:12,250 I think she's just saying that life would be, you know, life. 213 00:09:12,284 --> 00:09:15,119 I have transformed life here into a paradise. 214 00:09:15,154 --> 00:09:17,121 Prostitutes are now scientists. 215 00:09:17,156 --> 00:09:19,357 The homeless are now "phisosophers". 216 00:09:19,391 --> 00:09:21,159 Oh. Oh. "Ph-phisosophers"? Nice. 217 00:09:21,193 --> 00:09:23,294 - Philopol... phiphophopher... - Oh, my god. 218 00:09:23,329 --> 00:09:25,463 Where did you learn to talk, you grandpa-stealing slut? 219 00:09:25,497 --> 00:09:27,765 I'm feeling... 220 00:09:29,468 --> 00:09:30,835 Ugh. 221 00:09:30,869 --> 00:09:32,804 Oh, man, let me help all of you guys up. 222 00:09:32,838 --> 00:09:34,806 I'm fine. 223 00:09:38,510 --> 00:09:40,845 Do you know what I love about you, Rick? 224 00:09:40,879 --> 00:09:42,847 You're the only single mind I've met 225 00:09:42,881 --> 00:09:44,716 that really sees the big picture. 226 00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:45,950 You got that right. 227 00:09:45,985 --> 00:09:47,518 But, baby, listen 228 00:09:47,553 --> 00:09:50,021 y-you're talking about taking over planets and galaxies. 229 00:09:50,055 --> 00:09:53,024 You got to just remember to let go sometimes, you know? 230 00:09:53,058 --> 00:09:54,125 I can let go. Hey, look. 231 00:09:54,159 --> 00:09:55,760 You see that town across the river? 232 00:09:55,794 --> 00:09:57,562 Watch this. 233 00:09:57,596 --> 00:09:59,497 - Whoa! - Ha ha! Whoo! 234 00:09:59,531 --> 00:10:00,932 Whoa! That's not what I meant! 235 00:10:00,966 --> 00:10:03,501 It's okay. It's okay. 236 00:10:03,535 --> 00:10:06,471 I evacuated. I evacuated the town. Look. 237 00:10:06,505 --> 00:10:09,440 Hey! We're right here. We're fine. 238 00:10:13,445 --> 00:10:16,614 Oh, that was awesome. 239 00:10:16,649 --> 00:10:19,250 My my grandkids weren't in that town, right? 240 00:10:19,284 --> 00:10:21,185 A-are my grandkids alive? 241 00:10:21,220 --> 00:10:23,388 M-my drink is empty. 242 00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:31,763 ♪ ♪ 243 00:10:39,838 --> 00:10:42,774 - Unity, what's happening? - Who's Unity? 244 00:10:42,808 --> 00:10:45,576 You kids have nice feet. Mind if I take a picture? 245 00:10:45,611 --> 00:10:48,279 Gross. No. 246 00:10:48,313 --> 00:10:50,448 I think you're getting what you wanted, Summer. 247 00:10:50,482 --> 00:10:52,517 Something's happening to Unity. 248 00:10:52,551 --> 00:10:55,453 Do all of you remember who you are? 249 00:10:55,487 --> 00:10:57,655 Yeah, uh, my name is Ron Benson. 250 00:10:57,690 --> 00:11:00,858 I'm an electrical engineer, father of two, 251 00:11:00,893 --> 00:11:04,595 and, as you can see from my flat, concentric nipple rings, 252 00:11:04,630 --> 00:11:07,231 I'm a member of this planet's top race! 253 00:11:07,266 --> 00:11:08,866 Okay, that's good. 254 00:11:08,901 --> 00:11:11,502 Uh, don't focus too much on the last part, but-- 255 00:11:11,537 --> 00:11:13,905 I'm Daryl Jefferson. I'm a landscaper. 256 00:11:13,939 --> 00:11:15,306 And I'll be damned if 257 00:11:15,340 --> 00:11:17,709 that ripple-nipple bitch's race is superior! 258 00:11:17,743 --> 00:11:20,178 The cone-nipple people will rule this world! 259 00:11:20,212 --> 00:11:22,714 You shut your mouth, you dirty knife-nipple bastards. 260 00:11:22,748 --> 00:11:25,883 What'd you say to me, you target-chest piece of [bleep]? 261 00:11:25,918 --> 00:11:28,152 Race war! 262 00:11:34,259 --> 00:11:35,727 Ugh! 263 00:11:38,497 --> 00:11:39,530 Why are you fighting?! 264 00:11:39,565 --> 00:11:41,299 Can't you see you're all the same? 265 00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:43,367 Oh, Summer. 266 00:11:43,402 --> 00:11:45,403 First race war, huh? 267 00:11:49,146 --> 00:11:51,814 Way to go, Summer. You started a race war. 268 00:11:51,849 --> 00:11:54,350 I didn't start it! They're the racists. 269 00:11:54,384 --> 00:11:57,920 I merely empowered them to follow their apparently misguided dreams. 270 00:11:57,955 --> 00:11:59,322 Okay, thanks for clarifying. 271 00:11:59,356 --> 00:12:01,324 I'll have a super-accurate headstone now. 272 00:12:01,358 --> 00:12:02,759 Hey, wait what race are you guys? 273 00:12:02,793 --> 00:12:03,960 We're neither. S-see? 274 00:12:03,994 --> 00:12:05,428 Yeah, take my word for it. 275 00:12:05,462 --> 00:12:07,230 We just have regular nipples. 276 00:12:07,264 --> 00:12:09,866 Hey, these two freaks have no race! 277 00:12:09,900 --> 00:12:11,100 ♪ ♪ 278 00:12:15,906 --> 00:12:17,373 Oh, there's no place like home. 279 00:12:17,407 --> 00:12:19,175 There's no place like home. Remember, Summer? 280 00:12:19,209 --> 00:12:21,277 - From Dorothy and the tiny people movie? - Yes, yes. 281 00:12:21,311 --> 00:12:24,180 - All the tiny people. - Dorothy, take us away. 282 00:12:24,214 --> 00:12:27,416 ♪ ♪ 283 00:12:31,054 --> 00:12:33,055 Hello, Summer. Hello, Morty. 284 00:12:33,090 --> 00:12:35,558 - It's okay. You're safe now. - Unity? 285 00:12:35,592 --> 00:12:37,994 - Yes. - Oh, Unity, I am so sorry. 286 00:12:38,028 --> 00:12:41,831 I didn't know freedom meant people doing stuff that sucks. 287 00:12:41,865 --> 00:12:43,099 I was thinking more of 288 00:12:43,133 --> 00:12:45,067 a choose your own cellphone-carrier thing. 289 00:12:45,102 --> 00:12:46,602 Oh, Summer, you did nothing wrong. 290 00:12:46,637 --> 00:12:48,304 I'm having fun with your grandpa. 291 00:12:48,338 --> 00:12:49,572 Lost a little control. 292 00:12:49,606 --> 00:12:51,874 Probably shouldn't be piloting a hovercopter, 293 00:12:51,909 --> 00:12:54,777 nor should I be running 200,000 pediatric hospitals 294 00:12:54,812 --> 00:12:56,212 and 12 million deep fryers, 295 00:12:56,246 --> 00:12:59,081 but hey, it's not like this planet can take its business elsewhere. 296 00:12:59,116 --> 00:13:02,518 Um, should we maybe stop somewhere and get you a coffee? 297 00:13:02,553 --> 00:13:04,620 Maybe splash a little water on your face, or... 298 00:13:04,655 --> 00:13:08,357 No, no, if I wanted to be sober, I wouldn't have gotten drunk. 299 00:13:08,392 --> 00:13:11,327 Whoo-hoo-hoo! 300 00:13:13,430 --> 00:13:14,964 Oh, man. I cannot wait-- 301 00:13:14,998 --> 00:13:18,201 I cannot wait to hear Rick explain his way around this. 302 00:13:18,235 --> 00:13:19,468 He is gone. 303 00:13:19,503 --> 00:13:20,770 Jerry, stop, please, okay? 304 00:13:20,804 --> 00:13:22,471 We weren't even supposed to be down here. 305 00:13:22,506 --> 00:13:23,873 If we confront him about this-- 306 00:13:23,907 --> 00:13:25,241 Oh, my god! I love this. 307 00:13:25,275 --> 00:13:27,743 I love that this is how far you will go for him. 308 00:13:27,778 --> 00:13:30,146 You want to go upstairs and cut carrots 309 00:13:30,180 --> 00:13:34,050 and watch a Lifetime original above a [bleep] alien dungeon! 310 00:13:34,084 --> 00:13:37,253 Your relationship with your father is psychotic. 311 00:13:37,287 --> 00:13:38,721 Oh, listen to you relish the idea 312 00:13:38,755 --> 00:13:40,756 that my genius father is a bad person. 313 00:13:40,791 --> 00:13:42,358 Step out of your ego for a second 314 00:13:42,392 --> 00:13:44,393 and look at this thing; it's a monster. 315 00:13:44,428 --> 00:13:47,163 He might have it chained up so that it doesn't eat the planet! 316 00:13:47,197 --> 00:13:49,465 Right, because your father's such an altruist? 317 00:13:49,499 --> 00:13:52,935 I once saw him briefly forget the word for "humans". 318 00:13:52,970 --> 00:13:55,338 He's probably harvesting this creature's organs. 319 00:13:55,372 --> 00:13:57,440 He's probably racing to cure its space AIDS. 320 00:13:57,474 --> 00:13:59,234 - He's going to eat it! - He's protecting it! 321 00:13:59,843 --> 00:14:01,444 - Shut up! - Shut up! 322 00:14:02,679 --> 00:14:04,981 Whoa! 323 00:14:05,015 --> 00:14:06,649 Unity, this place is a mess. 324 00:14:06,683 --> 00:14:07,783 Oh, it's cool. 325 00:14:07,818 --> 00:14:10,186 The part of me that's the cleaning lady is coming on Friday. 326 00:14:10,220 --> 00:14:12,021 Oh, my god. I have a meeting 327 00:14:12,055 --> 00:14:13,956 at the Galactic Federation in an hour. 328 00:14:13,991 --> 00:14:16,492 Oh, I'll never make it. Ah, I'll push it to next week. 329 00:14:16,526 --> 00:14:18,494 Unity, could you get Rick out here, please? 330 00:14:18,528 --> 00:14:20,129 He's unavailable. He's... 331 00:14:20,163 --> 00:14:22,098 Having sex with you. We get it. Gross. 332 00:14:22,132 --> 00:14:23,232 Get him out here now. 333 00:14:23,267 --> 00:14:24,400 I don't think he wants to be-- 334 00:14:24,434 --> 00:14:26,535 - Grandpa Rick! - Rick! Rick! 335 00:14:26,570 --> 00:14:28,304 I'm gonna tell mom and dad about the gagoo 336 00:14:28,338 --> 00:14:29,805 you have locked up under the garage! 337 00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:32,341 What the hell is your problem? 338 00:14:32,376 --> 00:14:34,510 Grandpa, we need to go home, now. 339 00:14:34,544 --> 00:14:36,345 Fine. Sheesh. 340 00:14:39,082 --> 00:14:40,349 See you. 341 00:14:40,384 --> 00:14:42,051 Uh, Rick, I think we should allgo. 342 00:14:42,085 --> 00:14:44,387 Tend to your garden, kids. I'm kind of doing a thing here. 343 00:14:44,421 --> 00:14:46,622 Whoo! 344 00:14:46,657 --> 00:14:48,591 Grandpa Rick, we're not leaving without you. 345 00:14:48,625 --> 00:14:50,559 Oh, my god, you guys. I get it. 346 00:14:50,594 --> 00:14:52,728 You're afraid the big, bad hive mind 347 00:14:52,763 --> 00:14:54,764 is gonna steal your grandpa away. 348 00:14:54,798 --> 00:14:55,412 Actually, no. 349 00:14:55,437 --> 00:14:58,234 I think Unity's great and you're a horrible influence on it. 350 00:14:58,268 --> 00:14:59,902 - What? - This isn't healthy, Rick. 351 00:14:59,937 --> 00:15:02,571 You know, you're really up to no good 352 00:15:02,606 --> 00:15:04,707 around here a-at this place, you know? 353 00:15:04,741 --> 00:15:07,677 You and Unity are like... like leggings and mid-calf boots. 354 00:15:07,711 --> 00:15:09,078 You think you're great together, 355 00:15:09,112 --> 00:15:11,714 but you're just bringing out the worst in each other. 356 00:15:11,748 --> 00:15:14,283 Oh, gee. Boy, Summer. Well put. 357 00:15:14,318 --> 00:15:16,252 Uh, why don't we see what Unity thinks? 358 00:15:16,286 --> 00:15:17,553 Unity? 359 00:15:17,587 --> 00:15:19,355 I'm just taking a little break from stuff. 360 00:15:19,389 --> 00:15:21,324 You know? I need to relax. 361 00:15:21,358 --> 00:15:23,526 Oh, hey, w-what's this on the news, guys? 362 00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:24,860 Let me turn it up. 363 00:15:24,895 --> 00:15:27,830 In the news today, this looks a lot worse than it is. 364 00:15:27,864 --> 00:15:29,498 We're really just having a good time. 365 00:15:29,533 --> 00:15:30,866 - Karen? - Thanks, Todd. 366 00:15:30,901 --> 00:15:34,503 Up next, are you a concerned grandchild or just a buzzkill? 367 00:15:34,538 --> 00:15:36,405 We'll tell you how you can know for sure. 368 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:38,441 I think you two are a little outnumbered. 369 00:15:38,475 --> 00:15:40,576 Okay, well, what if you did it for me? 370 00:15:40,610 --> 00:15:44,680 What if you came with us as a favor to us because you love us? 371 00:15:44,715 --> 00:15:46,349 What? Dumb. Bye. 372 00:15:46,383 --> 00:15:47,750 But Rick, Summer's just--- 373 00:15:47,784 --> 00:15:49,552 Summer's just a hyper-emotional, needy little-- 374 00:15:49,586 --> 00:15:51,120 What's the word I'm looking for here? 375 00:15:51,154 --> 00:15:52,555 Uh... Human. 376 00:15:52,589 --> 00:15:53,656 It runs in the family. 377 00:15:53,690 --> 00:15:56,225 I can tolerate it, but I can't give a crap about it. 378 00:15:56,259 --> 00:15:57,660 Take a hike. 379 00:15:57,694 --> 00:16:00,930 Take care of yourself, Unity. 380 00:16:03,700 --> 00:16:06,168 I'm not looking for judgment, just a yes or no... 381 00:16:06,203 --> 00:16:08,104 can you assimilate a giraffe? 382 00:16:08,138 --> 00:16:09,703 - You're the worst! - No, you're the worst! 383 00:16:09,728 --> 00:16:12,241 You don't support this family! All you care about is yourself! 384 00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:14,243 - Is about supporting you emotionally... - You've got two children... 385 00:16:14,277 --> 00:16:16,445 - ...but you're unsupportable. - ...Being dragged across the cosmos... 386 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:18,647 - ...because it's never enough, Jerry! - ...By your dangerously ill father! 387 00:16:18,682 --> 00:16:21,017 And you force me to watch it happen because you'd rather lose them and lose me... 388 00:16:21,051 --> 00:16:23,486 And you don't even know what it's like to be afraid of losing anything ...Than lose him! 389 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:26,088 - Because you cling and you cling - Because you're the child, Beth! 390 00:16:26,123 --> 00:16:29,291 You, not me! You! 391 00:16:29,326 --> 00:16:30,760 - Aah! - Aah! 392 00:16:30,794 --> 00:16:32,328 - Oh, my god. - Aah! 393 00:16:37,667 --> 00:16:39,902 Um, first of all, hello. 394 00:16:39,936 --> 00:16:42,138 Uh, my name is Blim Blam the Korblok. 395 00:16:42,172 --> 00:16:43,806 Second of all, cards on the table, 396 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,674 I'm a murderer that eats babies, 397 00:16:45,709 --> 00:16:48,144 and I came to this planet to eat babies. 398 00:16:48,178 --> 00:16:52,214 However, I am also carrying a highly infectious disease 399 00:16:52,249 --> 00:16:56,585 that I suppose you could call "space AIDS" as you put it. 400 00:16:56,620 --> 00:16:59,889 And Rick did chain me up so that he could attempt to cure it. 401 00:16:59,923 --> 00:17:01,891 At the same time, 402 00:17:01,925 --> 00:17:03,926 Rick's motivation to cure my disease 403 00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:06,028 was not to save my life or anyone else's, 404 00:17:06,063 --> 00:17:09,298 but to patent and sell the cure for billions of blemflarcks. 405 00:17:09,332 --> 00:17:12,868 But you know the reason why I ripped my chains out of the wall? 406 00:17:12,903 --> 00:17:15,738 And do you know why I'm never coming back to this planet? 407 00:17:15,772 --> 00:17:19,742 Because the two of you are the [bleep] worst! 408 00:17:19,776 --> 00:17:22,311 You both hate yourselves and each other. 409 00:17:22,345 --> 00:17:26,315 And the idea that it has anything to do with Rick is laughable. 410 00:17:26,349 --> 00:17:28,584 I'd laugh, but I'm biologically incapable. 411 00:17:28,618 --> 00:17:30,219 That's how alien I am. 412 00:17:30,253 --> 00:17:32,855 And even I'm sitting here listening to the two of you 413 00:17:32,889 --> 00:17:35,758 and being like, "What the [beep]"? 414 00:17:35,792 --> 00:17:37,927 So good luck with your shitty marriage, 415 00:17:37,961 --> 00:17:41,297 and tell Rick I'm sorry he has to deal with either of you. 416 00:17:41,331 --> 00:17:43,732 Blim Blam out. 417 00:17:48,371 --> 00:17:50,039 You know what? I'm taking this. 418 00:17:54,554 --> 00:17:57,256 How do you-- What is this? 419 00:17:59,559 --> 00:18:02,361 Uh, is there a slow setting? 420 00:18:02,396 --> 00:18:05,598 Best door ever. 421 00:18:12,773 --> 00:18:15,942 Okay, okay. Now make them cry, but happy crying. 422 00:18:15,976 --> 00:18:18,110 Now make them all make fun of the blonde one. 423 00:18:18,145 --> 00:18:19,645 Now make them all do it on the table. 424 00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:22,081 I can't believe you created a whole show for me. 425 00:18:22,115 --> 00:18:23,549 Now cancel it. 426 00:18:23,583 --> 00:18:24,817 Okay, now put it back on. 427 00:18:25,986 --> 00:18:27,253 All right, I'm bored. 428 00:18:27,287 --> 00:18:30,289 Rick, is there a way for you to call Summer and Morty? 429 00:18:30,324 --> 00:18:32,925 - I feel bad that they-- - Pbht. Screw those guys. 430 00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:35,227 Ugh. I'll be right back. 431 00:18:35,262 --> 00:18:37,296 Don't waste your brain on those weirdos, Unity. 432 00:18:37,331 --> 00:18:39,865 They're no different from any of the aimless chumps that you occupy. 433 00:18:39,899 --> 00:18:42,601 They just put you at the center of their lives because you're powerful. 434 00:18:42,636 --> 00:18:44,170 And then because they put you there, 435 00:18:44,204 --> 00:18:45,571 they want you to be less powerful. 436 00:18:45,605 --> 00:18:46,806 Never gonna happen though, right? 437 00:18:46,840 --> 00:18:47,974 Never. 438 00:18:48,008 --> 00:18:50,076 Never. Back in a flash. 439 00:18:55,082 --> 00:18:56,949 Best weekend ever, Rick. 440 00:18:56,984 --> 00:19:00,419 I agree, Rick. Let's see how long we can go. 441 00:19:00,454 --> 00:19:03,489 Hey, Une. You got any more-- 442 00:19:05,792 --> 00:19:08,027 Rick, forgive me for doing this in notes. 443 00:19:08,061 --> 00:19:10,296 I'm not strong enough to do it in persons. 444 00:19:10,330 --> 00:19:13,632 I realize now that I'm attracted to you 445 00:19:13,667 --> 00:19:16,135 for the same reason I can't be with you. 446 00:19:16,169 --> 00:19:17,603 You can't change. 447 00:19:17,637 --> 00:19:19,939 And I have no problem with that, 448 00:19:19,973 --> 00:19:22,808 but it clearly means I have a problem with myself. 449 00:19:22,843 --> 00:19:25,011 I'm sure there's no perfect version of me. 450 00:19:25,045 --> 00:19:28,180 I'm sure I'll just unify species after species 451 00:19:28,215 --> 00:19:29,882 and never really be complete. 452 00:19:29,916 --> 00:19:32,718 But I know how it goes with us. 453 00:19:32,753 --> 00:19:35,121 I lose who I am and become part of you. 454 00:19:35,155 --> 00:19:36,722 Because in a strange way, 455 00:19:36,757 --> 00:19:39,258 you're better at what I do without even trying. 456 00:19:39,292 --> 00:19:44,730 Yours, and nobody else's, Unity. 457 00:19:44,765 --> 00:19:47,666 P.S., I don't know where those coal miners were 458 00:19:47,701 --> 00:19:48,734 before they were assimilated. 459 00:19:48,769 --> 00:19:50,469 You might want to get checked. 460 00:19:53,774 --> 00:19:55,908 Hey. 461 00:19:55,942 --> 00:19:57,309 Dad. 462 00:19:58,378 --> 00:20:01,847 I, um Jerry and I 463 00:20:01,882 --> 00:20:04,450 were looking for our weed whacker 464 00:20:04,484 --> 00:20:07,219 and found your subterranean lair 465 00:20:07,254 --> 00:20:11,590 and your alien prisoner, and he got away. 466 00:20:11,625 --> 00:20:13,092 And I know I sound like mom, 467 00:20:13,126 --> 00:20:14,927 but I can't sacrifice this whole family's safety 468 00:20:14,961 --> 00:20:16,862 just because I'm afraid you'll leave again, 469 00:20:16,897 --> 00:20:18,731 so no more alien prisoners 470 00:20:18,765 --> 00:20:23,235 and no more subterranean excavation without consulting us. 471 00:20:23,270 --> 00:20:25,171 - Okay. - Okay? 472 00:20:25,205 --> 00:20:28,274 "Okay" like you're gonna quietly teleport somewhere 473 00:20:28,308 --> 00:20:30,709 - and never come back? - No. It's your house. 474 00:20:30,744 --> 00:20:34,046 Grandpa Rick, what happened with Unity? 475 00:20:34,081 --> 00:20:36,582 Who? Oh, Unity. Yeah, well... 476 00:20:36,616 --> 00:20:38,417 I mean, honestly, we're talking about an entity 477 00:20:38,452 --> 00:20:39,885 that thrives on enslavement, you know? 478 00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:42,154 It's not cool. Fun's fun, but who needs it? 479 00:20:42,189 --> 00:20:43,456 I'll be in the garage. 480 00:20:56,903 --> 00:20:58,804 ♪ Lay it, lay it down ♪ 481 00:20:58,839 --> 00:21:00,706 ♪ Let me see your hand ♪ 482 00:21:00,740 --> 00:21:03,909 ♪ Show me what you got ♪ 483 00:21:03,944 --> 00:21:05,711 ♪ You're always talking ♪ 484 00:21:05,745 --> 00:21:07,379 ♪ But you're not playing ♪ 485 00:21:07,414 --> 00:21:10,716 ♪ It doesn't match your face ♪ 486 00:21:10,750 --> 00:21:14,587 ♪ Get them away, away from this place ♪ 487 00:21:14,621 --> 00:21:17,957 ♪ Can you take me now? ♪ 488 00:21:17,991 --> 00:21:19,825 ♪ I, I want it ♪ 489 00:21:19,860 --> 00:21:21,260 ♪ I want it real ♪ 490 00:21:21,294 --> 00:21:24,363 ♪ Are you afraid of me now? ♪ 491 00:21:24,397 --> 00:21:26,265 ♪ 492 00:21:26,299 --> 00:21:29,235 ♪ Are you afraid of me now? ♪ 493 00:21:29,269 --> 00:21:31,003 ♪ Do you feel it? ♪ 494 00:21:31,037 --> 00:21:32,438 ♪ Do you feel it? ♪ 495 00:21:32,472 --> 00:21:36,308 ♪ Do you feel that I can see your soul? ♪ 496 00:21:36,343 --> 00:21:38,010 ♪ Do you feel it? ♪ 497 00:21:38,044 --> 00:21:39,678 ♪ Do you feel it? ♪ 498 00:21:39,713 --> 00:21:42,248 ♪ Do you feel the pain in your heart? ♪ 499 00:21:42,282 --> 00:21:43,983 ♪ I, I want it ♪ 500 00:21:44,017 --> 00:21:45,451 ♪ I want it real ♪ 501 00:21:45,485 --> 00:21:48,354 ♪ Run away with me now ♪ 502 00:21:49,289 --> 00:21:50,656 ♪ I, I want it ♪ 503 00:21:50,690 --> 00:21:52,892 ♪ I want it real ♪ 504 00:21:52,926 --> 00:21:54,927 ♪ Run away with me now ♪ 505 00:21:54,961 --> 00:21:57,463 ♪ Ah, ah ♪ 506 00:21:58,765 --> 00:22:01,967 ♪ ♪ 507 00:22:10,310 --> 00:22:12,178 ♪ Don't leave me ♪ 508 00:22:13,313 --> 00:22:16,649 ♪ Never leave me out ♪ 509 00:22:16,683 --> 00:22:19,185 ♪ Don't leave me ♪ 510 00:22:20,053 --> 00:22:25,124 ♪ Never leave me out ♪ 511 00:22:29,729 --> 00:22:32,364 Unity! Unity! 512 00:22:32,399 --> 00:22:34,600 Unity! 513 00:22:34,634 --> 00:22:35,498 How can I assist you? 514 00:22:35,523 --> 00:22:37,636 I want to talk to Unity, beta seven. 515 00:22:37,671 --> 00:22:38,837 I know it's in there. 516 00:22:38,872 --> 00:22:40,539 You're classified as a hostile entity, 517 00:22:40,574 --> 00:22:42,274 and Unity doesn't want to talk to you. 518 00:22:42,309 --> 00:22:43,642 I know your game, beta seven. 519 00:22:43,677 --> 00:22:45,110 I've met a billion of you, 520 00:22:45,145 --> 00:22:46,979 you little on-deck, in-the-wings shoulder to cry on! 521 00:22:47,013 --> 00:22:50,049 You are classified as a hostile entity. 522 00:22:50,083 --> 00:22:51,650 Oh, you're just loving this, mother-- 523 00:22:51,685 --> 00:22:53,525 This isn't gonna shake out like you think, pal. 524 00:22:53,553 --> 00:22:54,920 Unity's not into other hive minds. 525 00:22:54,955 --> 00:22:56,589 It's gonna suck you in and use you up, 526 00:22:56,623 --> 00:22:57,856 and a month from now, 527 00:22:57,891 --> 00:22:59,992 I'm gonna be making out with all of you in a bunch of red wigs! 528 00:23:00,026 --> 00:23:02,361 Unity! Unity! 529 00:23:02,395 --> 00:23:04,730 Unity, I know you can hear me. Get out here. 530 00:23:04,764 --> 00:23:05,998 Weapons systems engaged. 531 00:23:06,032 --> 00:23:07,700 Oh, in your dreams you have weapon systems. 532 00:23:07,734 --> 00:23:10,402 Ugh, Rick, you said we were going to a movie. 533 00:23:10,437 --> 00:23:11,337 We are, Morty. 534 00:23:11,371 --> 00:23:12,972 All right, beta shit seven, 535 00:23:13,006 --> 00:23:15,140 you just got saved by the bell, bitch! 536 00:23:16,610 --> 00:23:18,110 Did you get any of that? 537 00:23:18,144 --> 00:23:20,112 It's-a good show-a. 538 00:23:20,136 --> 00:23:23,136 Sync and corrections by XhmikosR www.addic7ed.com 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net