1 00:00:03,135 --> 00:00:06,872 Steve, I just got a weird e-mail. Did you buy us airline tickets? 2 00:00:06,874 --> 00:00:08,808 Aw, shoot. It was supposed to be a surprise. 3 00:00:08,810 --> 00:00:11,878 I wanted to thank you for letting me live here all this time, 4 00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:13,713 so I'm treating the family to a vacation! 5 00:00:13,715 --> 00:00:15,014 Steve, you're so sweet. 6 00:00:15,016 --> 00:00:16,949 - Thanks, uncle Steve! - Best uncle ever! 7 00:00:16,951 --> 00:00:18,217 Look out, world. 8 00:00:18,219 --> 00:00:19,919 The Smith family is going to Paris! 9 00:00:19,921 --> 00:00:21,387 Yeah! Awesome! 10 00:00:21,389 --> 00:00:24,589 Rick, I don't like glowing rocks in the kitchen trash! 11 00:00:24,591 --> 00:00:28,060 Well, I don't like your unemployed genes in my grandchildren, Jerry, 12 00:00:28,062 --> 00:00:30,129 but life is made of little concessions. 13 00:00:30,131 --> 00:00:31,264 I-- You know what? 14 00:00:31,266 --> 00:00:32,965 You're gonna land on your feet, Jer. 15 00:00:32,967 --> 00:00:34,901 Some company out there's gonna thank their lucky stars 16 00:00:34,903 --> 00:00:36,569 they hired my little brother. 17 00:00:36,571 --> 00:00:39,105 - Who the [bleep] are you? - My goofy brother, Steve. 18 00:00:39,107 --> 00:00:41,574 He's been living here almost a year now. 19 00:00:41,576 --> 00:00:42,809 Are you losing your mind? 20 00:00:42,811 --> 00:00:46,145 Hey, someone's been spending too much time around glowing rocks. 21 00:00:46,147 --> 00:00:47,713 Am I right? 22 00:00:48,917 --> 00:00:50,750 - Oh, my god! - Call an ambulance! 23 00:00:50,752 --> 00:00:53,085 - Oh, god! Steve! - What the hell, Rick?! 24 00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:54,587 Will everybody just relax for a second? 25 00:00:54,589 --> 00:00:56,088 There's no such thing as an "uncle Steve". 26 00:00:56,090 --> 00:00:58,591 That is an alien parasite. 27 00:00:59,661 --> 00:01:02,261 - But I've known him my whole life. - No, you haven't, Jerry. 28 00:01:02,263 --> 00:01:05,398 These telepathic little bastards, they embed themselves in memories, 29 00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:08,935 and then they use those to multiply and spread out, take over planets. 30 00:01:08,937 --> 00:01:10,303 It's-- It's disgusting. 31 00:01:10,305 --> 00:01:12,698 - Steve wasn't real? - He's a real piece of shit. 32 00:01:12,723 --> 00:01:13,520 This is a big one. 33 00:01:13,545 --> 00:01:15,179 Somebody probably tracked it in last week 34 00:01:15,204 --> 00:01:17,176 on the bottom of their shoe on a piece of alien fruit. 35 00:01:17,178 --> 00:01:19,045 - Someone? - Get off the high road, Summer. 36 00:01:19,047 --> 00:01:22,014 We all got pink eye because you won't stop texting on the toilet. 37 00:01:22,016 --> 00:01:24,116 But uncle Steve taught me how to ride a bike! 38 00:01:24,118 --> 00:01:25,785 No, "Steve" put that memory in your brain 39 00:01:25,787 --> 00:01:28,421 so he could live in your house, eat your food, and multiply. 40 00:01:28,423 --> 00:01:30,256 We could be infested with these things. 41 00:01:30,258 --> 00:01:32,124 So we got to keep an eye out 42 00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:34,260 for any zany, wacky characters that pop up. 43 00:01:34,262 --> 00:01:35,361 Ooh, whee! 44 00:01:35,363 --> 00:01:37,096 Whatever you want, Rick! We're here to help! 45 00:01:37,098 --> 00:01:41,367 Thanks, Mr. Poopybutthole. I always could count on you. 46 00:01:41,369 --> 00:01:45,271 ♪ 47 00:02:06,708 --> 00:02:12,708 Sync & corrections by XhmikosR www.addic7ed.com 48 00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:15,401 ♪ 49 00:02:15,403 --> 00:02:18,070 All right. There's six of us, and that's it. 50 00:02:18,072 --> 00:02:21,007 Me, Morty, Jerry, Beth, Mr. Poopybutthole, and Summer. 51 00:02:21,009 --> 00:02:23,342 Maybe you got the first one in time, Rick! 52 00:02:23,344 --> 00:02:25,811 Can't afford to chance it. 53 00:02:30,517 --> 00:02:33,252 Dad, why does our house have blast shields? 54 00:02:33,254 --> 00:02:34,854 Trust me, Beth, you don't want to know 55 00:02:34,856 --> 00:02:36,188 how many answers that question has. 56 00:02:36,190 --> 00:02:38,090 Ooh, gosh, it feels claustrophobic! 57 00:02:38,092 --> 00:02:41,561 Reminds me of that time we all got stuck in the elevator together. 58 00:02:41,563 --> 00:02:45,731 Y-- remember that? After "The Hulk" musical? 59 00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:51,871 Jerry, buttons don't work better if you hit them harder, 60 00:02:51,873 --> 00:02:53,606 and foam fists don't make you strong. 61 00:02:53,608 --> 00:02:55,675 I know. Friends make you strong. 62 00:02:55,677 --> 00:02:57,843 I watched the same musical you did. 63 00:02:57,845 --> 00:02:59,779 Why couldn't I bring my portal gun? 64 00:02:59,781 --> 00:03:02,748 Why did all the drinks have to be extra large? 65 00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:04,283 Oh, the hulk. I just got that. 66 00:03:04,285 --> 00:03:07,053 Just pee your pants. I did it the minute we got stuck. 67 00:03:07,055 --> 00:03:08,921 Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, shame me. 68 00:03:08,923 --> 00:03:11,624 At least when I'm disgusting, it's on purpose. 69 00:03:11,626 --> 00:03:13,392 Oh, y'all, we're gonna be fine. 70 00:03:13,394 --> 00:03:16,796 I've always been here for you guys, and I always will be. 71 00:03:16,798 --> 00:03:20,132 Somebody call for repairs? 72 00:03:20,134 --> 00:03:21,601 Yay! Cousin Nicky! 73 00:03:21,603 --> 00:03:22,902 It's me, cousin Nicky. 74 00:03:22,904 --> 00:03:24,870 I'm walkin' here! I mean, I'm not. 75 00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:29,542 I'm crouched in the elevator shaft, but hey, I'm walkin' here! 76 00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:32,311 It's true. 77 00:03:32,313 --> 00:03:34,780 We really do get into some crazy situations as a family, 78 00:03:34,782 --> 00:03:37,049 mostly when we're cooped up like this. 79 00:03:37,051 --> 00:03:39,118 Hey, maybe Mr. Poopypants is right. 80 00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:40,419 Let's get some fresh air. 81 00:03:40,421 --> 00:03:41,954 Come on, cousin Nicky. You heard Rick. 82 00:03:41,956 --> 00:03:43,422 We have to stay quarantined 83 00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:45,458 until we know that there's no more of these things. 84 00:03:45,460 --> 00:03:46,559 I hear you, Morty. 85 00:03:46,561 --> 00:03:48,294 Back in Brooklyn, we got a sayin'-- 86 00:03:48,296 --> 00:03:50,496 "We're walkin' here!" 87 00:03:50,498 --> 00:03:51,831 Nicky, get-- 88 00:03:51,833 --> 00:03:53,065 Oh! 89 00:03:53,067 --> 00:03:54,834 What the...? 90 00:03:54,836 --> 00:03:56,602 Cousin Nicky was a parasite?! 91 00:03:56,604 --> 00:03:58,571 Six, Morty! There's supposed to be six of us! 92 00:03:58,573 --> 00:04:00,940 If there's seven, then that means somebody's not real. 93 00:04:00,942 --> 00:04:02,341 But how did you know it was Nicky? 94 00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:04,143 I guessed. That's why I aimed for his shoulder. 95 00:04:04,145 --> 00:04:06,078 So we can't trust any of our memories now? 96 00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:08,481 Nicky was the reason we found that old Nazi submarine. 97 00:04:08,483 --> 00:04:09,682 Did that not even happen? 98 00:04:09,684 --> 00:04:11,617 Well, of course it happened. 99 00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:14,987 Now that I possess the mighty staff of rah-gubaba, 100 00:04:14,989 --> 00:04:18,024 the world will tremble before the Fourth Reich! 101 00:04:18,026 --> 00:04:21,627 This is the last time I ask you for help on my history final, Rick. 102 00:04:21,629 --> 00:04:24,330 Hey, we got a word for Nazis back in Brooklyn, pal. 103 00:04:24,332 --> 00:04:26,298 I'm comfortable being called a Nazi. 104 00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:29,335 You think there's some other word that will hurt my feelings? 105 00:04:29,337 --> 00:04:31,971 Yeah. Think before you talk shit. 106 00:04:31,973 --> 00:04:35,007 Rah-gubaba, help me kill America! 107 00:04:35,009 --> 00:04:37,143 Mr. Beauregard! 108 00:04:37,145 --> 00:04:41,814 After due consideration, I have elected not to retire. 109 00:04:41,816 --> 00:04:43,449 Yeah! Oh, thank god! 110 00:04:43,451 --> 00:04:46,952 Now, I believe someone has a final exam to attend. 111 00:04:46,954 --> 00:04:49,455 Set a course for Morty's high school. 112 00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:52,124 Perhaps I'm biased, but if that story never happened, 113 00:04:52,126 --> 00:04:54,293 then I wouldn't still be the family butler. 114 00:04:54,295 --> 00:04:55,861 Dare to dream. 115 00:04:55,863 --> 00:04:57,463 Wait. 116 00:04:57,465 --> 00:04:59,365 And if Mr. Beauregard wasn't our butler, 117 00:04:59,367 --> 00:05:03,002 it's safe to say the family'd be in a hell of a lot of trouble. 118 00:05:03,004 --> 00:05:05,004 No! Don't flashback! 119 00:05:05,006 --> 00:05:06,706 You're just gonna make more swelling. 120 00:05:06,708 --> 00:05:08,074 - Just relax. - Don't worry, Jerry. 121 00:05:08,076 --> 00:05:09,108 We called the fire department. 122 00:05:09,110 --> 00:05:11,077 You know they won't come here anymore. 123 00:05:13,815 --> 00:05:15,014 Marmalade is served! 124 00:05:15,016 --> 00:05:16,682 Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! 125 00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:18,150 Oh, whee! 126 00:05:18,152 --> 00:05:20,986 I guess I take back what I said about British cuisine. 127 00:05:22,190 --> 00:05:24,523 Take that, Summer! 128 00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:25,991 We're trying to sleep. 129 00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,860 I don't want to go to the dance alone. 130 00:05:27,862 --> 00:05:31,264 Then perhaps you shouldn't. 131 00:05:31,366 --> 00:05:33,466 Aww. Mr. Beauregard. 132 00:05:33,568 --> 00:05:36,936 - Shall we, master Morty? - We shall. 133 00:05:36,938 --> 00:05:39,004 Oh, wait, don't leave without letting 134 00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:40,706 photography Raptor take a picture. 135 00:05:44,178 --> 00:05:46,345 Everybody stop remembering! 136 00:05:46,347 --> 00:05:48,047 These parasites are like bed bugs, 137 00:05:48,049 --> 00:05:50,216 and every flashback is another mattress. Look! 138 00:05:50,218 --> 00:05:52,785 There's only supposed to be six people in this house. 139 00:05:52,787 --> 00:05:54,253 But there's always been 10. 140 00:05:54,255 --> 00:05:55,421 No! 141 00:05:55,423 --> 00:05:56,889 Uh, the fact that I wrote this number down 142 00:05:56,891 --> 00:05:58,057 means that there's four parasites. 143 00:05:58,059 --> 00:05:59,358 You sure about that, Rick? 144 00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:01,026 Begging your pardon, master Rick, 145 00:06:01,028 --> 00:06:03,062 but I seem to recall a great deal of confusion 146 00:06:03,064 --> 00:06:04,263 surrounding that number. 147 00:06:04,265 --> 00:06:05,531 All right, there's six of us. 148 00:06:05,533 --> 00:06:06,932 And that's it. 149 00:06:06,934 --> 00:06:09,435 Me, Morty, Jerry, Beth, Mr. Poopybutthole, 150 00:06:09,437 --> 00:06:11,937 Frankenstein, Sleepy Gary, photography Raptor, 151 00:06:11,939 --> 00:06:13,372 Mr. Beauregard, and Summer. 152 00:06:13,374 --> 00:06:15,241 Uh, dad, that's like 10 people. 153 00:06:15,243 --> 00:06:17,209 6, 10, what's the difference? 154 00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:19,745 I just love the number 6 for no reason! 155 00:06:19,747 --> 00:06:21,046 Where's my pencil at? 156 00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:24,216 - Here, Rick! Use me! - Oh, thanks, Pencilvester! 157 00:06:24,218 --> 00:06:26,318 Yeah, I guess that is what happened, 158 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:28,254 but I don't get why I would do that. 159 00:06:28,256 --> 00:06:30,055 Everybody makes mistakes, Rick. 160 00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:31,991 Why do you think I have one of these? 161 00:06:34,095 --> 00:06:35,628 That's it. Photos. 162 00:06:35,630 --> 00:06:36,896 Hard evidence. 163 00:06:36,898 --> 00:06:39,665 You're not in any of my photos, Mr. Poopybutthole. 164 00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:41,667 Well, what do you know about this? 165 00:06:41,669 --> 00:06:44,170 You're not in any of mine. 166 00:06:44,172 --> 00:06:48,107 All I have are pictures of me and my friends from school. 167 00:06:48,309 --> 00:06:50,943 What? What teenage girl has pictures of her family? 168 00:06:50,945 --> 00:06:52,611 It's not like we're mormon or dying. 169 00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:55,781 I will admit it's suspicious that Summer's only friend 170 00:06:55,783 --> 00:06:58,818 is a magic ballerina lamb that we've never seen. 171 00:06:58,820 --> 00:07:00,452 Summer! 172 00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:01,954 Tinkles! 173 00:07:01,956 --> 00:07:04,123 It's past my bedtime. 174 00:07:04,125 --> 00:07:06,192 Not in never past bedtime land! 175 00:07:06,194 --> 00:07:08,127 Here we go! 176 00:07:08,129 --> 00:07:11,197 ♪ Summer and Tinkles friends with each other ♪ 177 00:07:11,199 --> 00:07:14,300 ♪ Living in never past bedtime land ♪ 178 00:07:14,302 --> 00:07:17,803 ♪ No kitchen sinkles no little brother ♪ 179 00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:20,806 ♪ Going to raves and waving our hands ♪ 180 00:07:20,808 --> 00:07:22,641 ♪ Summer and tinkle, friends to the end ♪ 181 00:07:22,643 --> 00:07:24,476 ♪ Group text the whole crew, my mother... friends! ♪ 182 00:07:24,478 --> 00:07:26,378 ♪ Ketchup to the salt, salt to the fry ♪ 183 00:07:26,380 --> 00:07:27,880 ♪ "T" to the "inkle" with a capital "I" ♪ 184 00:07:27,882 --> 00:07:31,084 Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! 185 00:07:31,786 --> 00:07:33,886 - Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! - Summer, we're trying to sleep. 186 00:07:33,888 --> 00:07:35,654 It was Tinkles! 187 00:07:35,656 --> 00:07:36,689 Tinkles? 188 00:07:36,691 --> 00:07:38,324 That is su-- Suspicious. 189 00:07:38,326 --> 00:07:40,292 We're always hearing about this Tinkles character, 190 00:07:40,294 --> 00:07:41,994 - but we never get to-- - Hi, everybody. 191 00:07:41,996 --> 00:07:44,163 I'm Tinkles, and these are my friends. 192 00:07:45,333 --> 00:07:46,999 See, everyone? Tinkles is real. 193 00:07:47,001 --> 00:07:48,334 That means so am I. 194 00:07:48,336 --> 00:07:50,502 - Sorry, Summer. - Man, I'm sorry, Summer. 195 00:07:50,504 --> 00:07:53,239 I was on the wrong side of the pitchfork on this one. 196 00:07:53,241 --> 00:07:56,008 Okay, look, we shouldn't need evidence or logic 197 00:07:56,010 --> 00:07:58,143 to know who's family and who isn't. 198 00:07:58,145 --> 00:07:59,678 I know who the Smiths are. 199 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:01,914 I've known Beth since high school. 200 00:08:01,916 --> 00:08:06,018 And her husband, Sleepy Gary, is hands down my absolute best friend. 201 00:08:06,020 --> 00:08:07,253 Thanks, Jerry. 202 00:08:07,255 --> 00:08:10,522 Beyond that, no offense to any of you, but all bets are off. 203 00:08:10,524 --> 00:08:12,858 Look, I'm not used to being this unsure for this long. 204 00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:14,727 I'm just gonna aim for shoulders starting with the weird girl. 205 00:08:14,729 --> 00:08:15,928 Aah! 206 00:08:15,930 --> 00:08:17,997 - Grandpa Rick! - Hold still, "Summer". 207 00:08:17,999 --> 00:08:20,232 Rick, that is my daughter. 208 00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:22,701 Oh, yeah? Well, what if you just think that, Sleepy Gary? 209 00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:25,204 I've known you for 15 years. Don't make me hurt you. 210 00:08:25,206 --> 00:08:27,506 Rick, these are our family and friends, 211 00:08:27,508 --> 00:08:29,375 the people we barbecue with. 212 00:08:29,377 --> 00:08:31,377 Have you forgotten the barbecue? 213 00:08:31,379 --> 00:08:32,678 Wait, why would you want me to-- 214 00:08:32,680 --> 00:08:34,113 You're one of them, aren't you? 215 00:08:34,115 --> 00:08:37,116 Rick. You love those barbecues, Rick. 216 00:08:37,118 --> 00:08:38,684 You love them. Hai! 217 00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:39,718 Remember it, Rick? 218 00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:42,288 Shut up, Hamurai! Shut up, Amish Cyborg! 219 00:08:42,290 --> 00:08:44,056 What is this? '90s Conan? 220 00:08:44,058 --> 00:08:46,025 Remember the barbecue. 221 00:08:46,027 --> 00:08:47,359 Remember the barbecue. 222 00:08:47,361 --> 00:08:48,894 Remember the barbecue. 223 00:08:48,896 --> 00:08:51,263 You know what, Pencilvester? 224 00:08:51,265 --> 00:08:53,399 It took me my whole life to realize it, 225 00:08:53,401 --> 00:08:54,867 but I love barbecuing. 226 00:08:54,869 --> 00:08:56,702 - You're good at it, Rick. - Watch me, baby. 227 00:08:56,704 --> 00:08:58,737 I'm like Tom Cruise from, um, "Cuisine" 228 00:08:58,739 --> 00:09:01,540 or w-whatever that movie's called where he makes drinks. 229 00:09:01,542 --> 00:09:02,775 Yeah, check me out. 230 00:09:02,777 --> 00:09:04,743 I'm like Tom Cruise from "Cuisine". 231 00:09:04,745 --> 00:09:05,744 Yeah. 232 00:09:05,746 --> 00:09:07,446 Is that what it's called? "Cuisine"? 233 00:09:07,448 --> 00:09:08,814 Wow! Hey, everybody. 234 00:09:08,816 --> 00:09:11,283 Let's give it up for the grillmaster Rick! 235 00:09:11,285 --> 00:09:12,484 Rick! Rick! Rick! 236 00:09:16,624 --> 00:09:17,957 Wait. 237 00:09:20,795 --> 00:09:22,094 Noooooo! 238 00:09:22,096 --> 00:09:23,295 Shoot. Now look. 239 00:09:23,297 --> 00:09:25,731 It's like a "Where's Waldo?" page. Can you find me? 240 00:09:25,733 --> 00:09:27,266 Check out all these zany characters. 241 00:09:27,268 --> 00:09:29,568 We'll be right back after these messages. 242 00:09:31,038 --> 00:09:32,572 I think you should put down the gun 243 00:09:32,574 --> 00:09:33,907 and we should get you to a doctor. 244 00:09:33,909 --> 00:09:35,775 What do you say we take down these blast shields? 245 00:09:35,777 --> 00:09:37,544 - Yeah. - I can't do that, Sleepy Gary. 246 00:09:37,546 --> 00:09:38,845 All right, everybody listen to me. 247 00:09:38,847 --> 00:09:40,547 I don't know if any of you guys are real, 248 00:09:40,549 --> 00:09:42,549 but this house has been infested with fake loved ones 249 00:09:42,551 --> 00:09:43,950 that spread through fake memories, 250 00:09:43,952 --> 00:09:45,952 and our planet will be destroyed if they get out. 251 00:09:47,189 --> 00:09:51,458 But, Rick, even you have to admit you do tend to overreact to stuff. 252 00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:54,261 You guys, we got to hurry. I just got back from Walmart. 253 00:09:54,263 --> 00:09:56,963 They're selling Nintendo 3DS systems for $149.99 on sale, 254 00:09:56,965 --> 00:09:59,566 plus every time you buy one, you get a $50 gift card. 255 00:09:59,568 --> 00:10:01,734 Brings the total price down to $110 after tax. 256 00:10:01,736 --> 00:10:04,104 Now, listen, we can flip those sons of bitches 257 00:10:04,106 --> 00:10:05,472 for 230 bucks apiece easy! 258 00:10:05,474 --> 00:10:07,474 They're all limited-edition "Zelda" ones. 259 00:10:07,476 --> 00:10:08,942 Hurry! Hurry! Come with me! 260 00:10:08,944 --> 00:10:11,244 We can be rich, and we also all get to keep one 261 00:10:11,246 --> 00:10:12,812 and we can play Nintendo games! 262 00:10:12,814 --> 00:10:14,981 Nintendo, give me free stuff. 263 00:10:14,983 --> 00:10:17,484 Okay, yes, I definitely remember doing that, 264 00:10:17,486 --> 00:10:19,319 but also, I would never do that. 265 00:10:19,321 --> 00:10:20,787 Don't overreact, Rick. 266 00:10:20,789 --> 00:10:23,056 - Sleepy Gary, a word? - Sure, Jerry. 267 00:10:23,058 --> 00:10:24,657 Rick, keep a level head, okay? 268 00:10:24,659 --> 00:10:27,427 'Cause I'll tell you a secret about Frankenstein-- 269 00:10:27,429 --> 00:10:31,431 He's actually Frankenstein's monster. 270 00:10:33,234 --> 00:10:36,803 Sleepy Gary, my head is filled with memories of our friendship. 271 00:10:36,805 --> 00:10:40,507 I'm convinced that you're Beth's husband and I'm your friend, 272 00:10:40,509 --> 00:10:42,842 but if those memories can't be trusted, then... 273 00:10:42,844 --> 00:10:43,943 Jerry, just say it. 274 00:10:43,945 --> 00:10:47,347 Sleepy Gary, how do we know I'm real? 275 00:10:47,349 --> 00:10:48,848 Jesus, Jerry. 276 00:10:48,850 --> 00:10:52,085 No, you're real. Hey, look at me. 277 00:10:52,087 --> 00:10:53,753 Now, I don't know which way is up out there, 278 00:10:53,755 --> 00:10:56,523 but I know us, and you're real, Jerry. 279 00:10:56,525 --> 00:10:58,491 Remember our vacation? 280 00:11:00,627 --> 00:11:03,295 They're filming that new "Star Wars" movie down the coast. 281 00:11:03,297 --> 00:11:06,766 - Should we check it out? - Sure. Why not? 282 00:11:13,674 --> 00:11:16,409 Maybe we'll see Chewbacca. 283 00:11:16,811 --> 00:11:19,579 I'd like that. 284 00:11:25,486 --> 00:11:28,090 What are we doing? 285 00:11:32,993 --> 00:11:35,728 I don't give a damn what else happens out there. 286 00:11:35,730 --> 00:11:38,631 You and I are going to survive this. 287 00:11:38,633 --> 00:11:39,999 Okay. 288 00:11:40,001 --> 00:11:43,236 Hey, we agreed. Never in the house. 289 00:11:44,738 --> 00:11:47,573 That's a cool watch there, Rick. Can I check it out? 290 00:11:47,575 --> 00:11:49,175 Uh, no thank-- 291 00:11:49,177 --> 00:11:50,376 Okay. 292 00:11:50,378 --> 00:11:52,879 Trying to figure out how to lower the blast shields, huh? 293 00:11:52,881 --> 00:11:54,614 Anybody here think it's suspicious 294 00:11:54,616 --> 00:11:57,083 that a lot of people in here can't wait to get out of here? 295 00:11:57,085 --> 00:12:00,753 Ah, you're paranoid, Rick. You've been paranoid since 'nam. 296 00:12:00,755 --> 00:12:02,088 So, what are you gonna do 297 00:12:02,090 --> 00:12:03,723 when you rotate back to the world, Frankenstein? 298 00:12:03,725 --> 00:12:06,292 Shi-i-i-i-t. I'mma bust a-- 299 00:12:06,294 --> 00:12:08,728 No! Get out of my head, parasite! 300 00:12:08,730 --> 00:12:09,929 - No! - Drop it. 301 00:12:09,931 --> 00:12:11,597 Give me the gun, Frankenstein! 302 00:12:14,468 --> 00:12:15,701 Give it back! 303 00:12:15,703 --> 00:12:17,637 Yeah! 304 00:12:17,639 --> 00:12:19,272 Frankenstein! 305 00:12:19,274 --> 00:12:21,140 Is anyone here even real? 306 00:12:21,142 --> 00:12:22,542 Am I the only real person on Earth?! 307 00:12:22,544 --> 00:12:23,810 Maybe. 308 00:12:23,812 --> 00:12:25,945 Or maybe, just maybe, we're all real. 309 00:12:25,947 --> 00:12:27,880 You know me. I'm Reverse Giraffe. 310 00:12:27,882 --> 00:12:29,649 I have a short neck and legs. 311 00:12:29,651 --> 00:12:31,717 - I went to college with Hamurai. - Hai! 312 00:12:31,719 --> 00:12:33,820 I saved Ghost in a Jar's life in Vietnam. 313 00:12:33,822 --> 00:12:35,988 - Boo rah! - And, Beth, how many times 314 00:12:35,990 --> 00:12:37,890 have I been a shoulder for you to cry on? 315 00:12:37,892 --> 00:12:39,759 Too many. 316 00:12:39,761 --> 00:12:41,661 Okay, so maybe we're just all fake. 317 00:12:41,663 --> 00:12:43,062 That don't make no sense! 318 00:12:43,064 --> 00:12:45,231 Or maybe there's only one deceiver here-- 319 00:12:45,233 --> 00:12:47,066 The person that keeps telling us 320 00:12:47,068 --> 00:12:49,502 the path to salvation is being held prisoner 321 00:12:49,504 --> 00:12:50,970 and mistrusting each other. 322 00:12:50,972 --> 00:12:52,305 Hey, don't blame me! 323 00:12:52,307 --> 00:12:53,906 I tried to shoot Summer 10 minutes ago! 324 00:12:53,908 --> 00:12:56,108 I know we all have beloved memories of Rick, 325 00:12:56,110 --> 00:12:58,077 but are we really supposed to believe 326 00:12:58,079 --> 00:13:00,980 that a mad scientist inventor with a flying car 327 00:13:00,982 --> 00:13:04,517 just showed up on our doorstep after being gone for years? 328 00:13:04,519 --> 00:13:07,039 Yeah, you know, he does have a lot of really weird, 329 00:13:07,064 --> 00:13:08,321 made-up sounding catchphrases. 330 00:13:08,423 --> 00:13:09,922 Wubba lubba dub dub! 331 00:13:09,924 --> 00:13:11,991 Ricky ticky tavi, beyotch! 332 00:13:11,993 --> 00:13:15,328 And that's the wa-a-a-a-y the news goes. 333 00:13:15,330 --> 00:13:16,562 Hit the sack, Jack. 334 00:13:16,564 --> 00:13:18,364 Uh-oh! Somersault jump. 335 00:13:18,366 --> 00:13:19,832 AIDS! 336 00:13:19,834 --> 00:13:23,536 And that's why I always say shum shum shlippedy dop! 337 00:13:23,538 --> 00:13:27,240 Grassss tastes bad-ah. 338 00:13:27,242 --> 00:13:28,941 No jumpin' in the sewer. 339 00:13:28,943 --> 00:13:29,942 Burger time! 340 00:13:29,944 --> 00:13:31,844 Rubber baby baby bunkers! 341 00:13:31,846 --> 00:13:34,013 Lick, lick, lick my balls! 342 00:13:34,015 --> 00:13:35,214 Yeah! 343 00:13:35,216 --> 00:13:36,549 Say that all the time. 344 00:13:37,852 --> 00:13:39,285 That's a fake-ass catchphrase right there. 345 00:13:39,287 --> 00:13:41,754 Yeah, don't forget his incredibly vague back story. 346 00:13:41,756 --> 00:13:43,356 Beth, I'm your father! 347 00:13:43,358 --> 00:13:44,624 Oh, are you, dad? Are you? 348 00:13:44,626 --> 00:13:46,259 Rick, if you want to prove you're real, 349 00:13:46,261 --> 00:13:48,628 just do what any of the rest of us would do and-- 350 00:13:48,630 --> 00:13:51,564 And-- and open the blast shields and let us the hell out of here! 351 00:13:51,566 --> 00:13:54,867 Why don't you make me, implausibly naive pubescent boy 352 00:13:54,869 --> 00:13:57,403 with an old Jewish comedy writer's name? 353 00:13:57,405 --> 00:13:58,771 Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! 354 00:13:58,773 --> 00:14:00,340 In your face! 355 00:14:00,342 --> 00:14:02,108 Give me the gun. 356 00:14:02,610 --> 00:14:05,745 I'm not doing this in front of Pencilvester. 357 00:14:05,747 --> 00:14:07,547 Bring him to the garage. 358 00:14:08,950 --> 00:14:11,818 You listen to me, you son of a bitch parasite scum. 359 00:14:11,820 --> 00:14:14,253 We could either do this the easy way or the hard way. 360 00:14:14,255 --> 00:14:15,721 You know, y-y-y-- Do you want to live? 361 00:14:15,723 --> 00:14:17,056 Then open the blast shield doors. 362 00:14:17,058 --> 00:14:18,991 Shut up, Morty, you brainwashed, little turd 363 00:14:18,993 --> 00:14:21,494 that might not even be real because I'm brainwashed, too. 364 00:14:21,496 --> 00:14:23,095 You know, Rick, this isn't easy for us. 365 00:14:23,097 --> 00:14:24,997 You know, w-we all remember you as a friend. 366 00:14:24,999 --> 00:14:26,632 Oh, oh, oh, really? 367 00:14:26,634 --> 00:14:28,668 Well, I remember you as a whiny, little piece of shit, Morty! 368 00:14:28,670 --> 00:14:29,936 - Oh-- oh, yeah? - Yeah! 369 00:14:29,938 --> 00:14:31,504 I've got about a thousand memories 370 00:14:31,506 --> 00:14:34,006 of your dumb, little ass and about six of them are pleasant. 371 00:14:34,008 --> 00:14:35,641 The rest is annoying garbage. 372 00:14:35,643 --> 00:14:37,844 So why don't you do us both a favor and pull the trigger? 373 00:14:37,846 --> 00:14:39,245 Do it! Do it, mother[bleep]! 374 00:14:39,247 --> 00:14:41,648 Pull the [bleep] trigger! 375 00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:44,684 Oh, wow. 376 00:14:44,686 --> 00:14:46,619 Baby wizard was a parasite? 377 00:14:46,621 --> 00:14:48,488 He set me up with my wife. 378 00:14:48,490 --> 00:14:50,423 What the hell? 379 00:14:50,425 --> 00:14:51,958 I figured it out, Rick! 380 00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:53,793 The parasites can only create pleasant memories. 381 00:14:53,795 --> 00:14:57,830 I know you're real because I have a ton of bad memories with you! 382 00:14:57,932 --> 00:15:02,669 ♪ These memories that we have ♪ 383 00:15:04,805 --> 00:15:09,843 ♪ These memories that we cherish ♪ 384 00:15:10,445 --> 00:15:18,145 ♪ I wish that we can go back to that time ♪ 385 00:15:20,355 --> 00:15:22,555 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ 386 00:15:22,557 --> 00:15:24,657 Holy crap, Morty, you're right. 387 00:15:24,659 --> 00:15:27,459 Isn't that what you were trying to make me understand by yelling at me? 388 00:15:27,461 --> 00:15:31,698 Well, yeah, duh-doy. Took you long enough. 389 00:15:33,835 --> 00:15:35,334 Now let's go, Morty. 390 00:15:35,336 --> 00:15:37,670 We got a lot of friends and family to exterminate. 391 00:15:41,041 --> 00:15:43,543 Everybody remain calm! This is gonna take some explaining. 392 00:15:43,545 --> 00:15:46,245 We need to kill everyone that we can only remember fondly. 393 00:15:46,247 --> 00:15:48,414 Who's got a bad memory about Mrs. Refrigerator? 394 00:15:48,416 --> 00:15:51,484 I-I-- everyone has bad memories of me. 395 00:15:51,486 --> 00:15:53,419 You remember that one time? 396 00:15:57,425 --> 00:16:00,293 Ooh, man, we couldn't stop screaming. 397 00:16:00,295 --> 00:16:03,863 Uh, roller coasters aren't bad, Mrs. Refrigerator. 398 00:16:03,865 --> 00:16:05,364 They're thrilling. 399 00:16:05,366 --> 00:16:09,001 And you've been a perfect companion to me my entire life. 400 00:16:09,003 --> 00:16:10,236 The jig is up! 401 00:16:10,238 --> 00:16:12,238 Get me out of here. 402 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:13,739 Get me out of here! 403 00:16:13,741 --> 00:16:15,241 Aah! 404 00:16:15,243 --> 00:16:17,009 Oh [bleep]! 405 00:16:17,011 --> 00:16:18,878 Everybody back! If you're not a parasite, 406 00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:20,913 you have nothing to fear. So what about Summer? 407 00:16:20,915 --> 00:16:23,316 Why am I always your go-to? 408 00:16:26,287 --> 00:16:28,854 - Never go in my room again. - I didn't! 409 00:16:28,856 --> 00:16:30,189 She's real. 410 00:16:30,191 --> 00:16:32,359 She's my bitch of a sister. 411 00:16:32,383 --> 00:16:33,560 Nice. 412 00:16:35,063 --> 00:16:37,096 ♪ 413 00:16:37,098 --> 00:16:38,798 Mom, are you driving me to-- 414 00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:40,600 Hmm? Yeah, yeah, yes. What time? 415 00:16:40,602 --> 00:16:41,968 Oh, my god. Are you drunk? 416 00:16:41,970 --> 00:16:43,569 What are you? 417 00:16:43,571 --> 00:16:44,937 - My wife coach? - Your what? 418 00:16:44,939 --> 00:16:46,305 Oh! God! Oh. Oh, my gosh. 419 00:16:46,307 --> 00:16:48,307 - Oh! God! Mom! - Sweetheart, are you okay? 420 00:16:48,309 --> 00:16:50,270 - I didn't mean to-- - I'm gonna have a bruise! 421 00:16:50,295 --> 00:16:52,754 - It's picture day! - It's not-- don't overreact. 422 00:16:52,979 --> 00:16:54,046 I can clean it up. 423 00:16:54,048 --> 00:16:56,048 I want the police to take me! 424 00:16:56,050 --> 00:16:57,950 Morty, give a gun to the lady 425 00:16:57,952 --> 00:17:00,119 that got pregnant with me too early 426 00:17:00,121 --> 00:17:02,421 and constantly makes it our problem. 427 00:17:02,423 --> 00:17:04,490 Thank you, sweetie. 428 00:17:04,792 --> 00:17:05,570 Beth, Beth, please! 429 00:17:05,595 --> 00:17:07,026 I thought it was too good to be true 430 00:17:07,028 --> 00:17:08,428 that we'd have compatible kidneys. 431 00:17:23,244 --> 00:17:24,343 Come on, man. 432 00:17:24,345 --> 00:17:26,078 Haven't we ever had an uncomfortable silence 433 00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:27,847 or an awkward fart on a road trip? 434 00:17:27,849 --> 00:17:29,849 Come on, Pencilvester. Give me anything. 435 00:17:29,851 --> 00:17:31,183 Rick, I'm Pencilvester. 436 00:17:31,185 --> 00:17:33,419 Listen to that name. You can't kill me. 437 00:17:33,421 --> 00:17:35,488 You're right. 438 00:17:35,590 --> 00:17:38,024 Kill Pencilvester. 439 00:17:48,202 --> 00:17:50,036 Summer, I've always loved you! 440 00:17:50,038 --> 00:17:52,238 Yep. 441 00:18:07,788 --> 00:18:10,823 - Oh, my god! - I thought you went to a concert! 442 00:18:10,825 --> 00:18:13,125 We forgot the tickets! Why in the kitchen?! 443 00:18:13,127 --> 00:18:15,161 I do it everywhere! Stop shaming me! 444 00:18:15,163 --> 00:18:16,696 You're not the victim here! 445 00:18:16,698 --> 00:18:19,832 I hate you, and I was thinking about your friend Grace! 446 00:18:19,834 --> 00:18:21,534 Aaaaaah! 447 00:18:25,338 --> 00:18:27,239 Ah. Master Rick. 448 00:18:27,241 --> 00:18:29,842 Remember when you weren't going to shoot me? 449 00:18:31,179 --> 00:18:33,579 I guess I did the Butler! Ha ha! 450 00:18:33,581 --> 00:18:35,548 Does-- Does that scan? 451 00:18:35,550 --> 00:18:36,882 Oh, I get it. 452 00:18:36,884 --> 00:18:39,351 It's a play on "The Butler did it." 453 00:18:39,353 --> 00:18:40,853 Thanks, Ghost in a Jar. 454 00:18:40,855 --> 00:18:44,091 You always were good at pointing out potentially obscure comedy. 455 00:18:48,229 --> 00:18:50,262 You got to hide me, Sleepy Gary. 456 00:18:50,264 --> 00:18:52,064 Don't worry. I have a plan. 457 00:18:52,066 --> 00:18:54,533 If we can get to my boat, there's a-- 458 00:18:55,870 --> 00:18:57,269 No. No! 459 00:18:57,271 --> 00:19:01,173 Just send me to Gary. I want to be with Gary. 460 00:19:01,175 --> 00:19:02,875 Oh, god. 461 00:19:02,877 --> 00:19:04,276 Whoa. What the hell? 462 00:19:04,278 --> 00:19:06,245 Look out for that homeless guy! 463 00:19:06,247 --> 00:19:08,347 Open the door! Open the door! 464 00:19:08,349 --> 00:19:10,883 There isn't time! Just run! 465 00:19:10,885 --> 00:19:13,119 Get out here and help me! 466 00:19:13,121 --> 00:19:15,755 They say you shouldn't do that! Just run! 467 00:19:15,857 --> 00:19:18,724 Ugh. Sorry, Jerry. You're real. 468 00:19:18,726 --> 00:19:20,960 I'm a parasite! 469 00:19:20,962 --> 00:19:23,129 Yeah, but you're real. 470 00:19:23,131 --> 00:19:27,166 Uh, uh, I need time to forget about Sleepy Gary. 471 00:19:27,368 --> 00:19:28,667 Me, too. 472 00:19:32,039 --> 00:19:33,572 From now on, let's all be careful 473 00:19:33,574 --> 00:19:36,242 to wash our hands when we get back from outer space. 474 00:19:36,244 --> 00:19:37,810 That goes for everyone. 475 00:19:37,812 --> 00:19:39,145 This is depressing. 476 00:19:39,147 --> 00:19:41,147 We killed every good person in the house. 477 00:19:41,149 --> 00:19:43,149 We're what's left? What a family. 478 00:19:43,151 --> 00:19:44,817 At least we're real, Jerry. 479 00:19:44,819 --> 00:19:46,619 We're real. Ricky ticky tavi! 480 00:19:46,621 --> 00:19:49,221 Ooh, whee! Amen to that. 481 00:19:49,223 --> 00:19:51,924 Now, this little Poopypants is hungry. 482 00:19:51,926 --> 00:19:53,926 Will somebody pass me a pork chop? 483 00:19:57,165 --> 00:19:58,164 Huh. 484 00:19:58,166 --> 00:20:00,332 Is-- is something wrong, Beth? 485 00:20:00,334 --> 00:20:01,333 Ow! 486 00:20:01,335 --> 00:20:02,434 Oh, my god! 487 00:20:02,436 --> 00:20:03,836 - No, Beth! - Oh [bleep]! 488 00:20:03,838 --> 00:20:05,504 Wait, but I-- 489 00:20:05,506 --> 00:20:06,972 - Oh, Beth! Why?! - I need an ambulance! 490 00:20:06,974 --> 00:20:08,440 There's been a shooting. My wife shot... 491 00:20:08,442 --> 00:20:11,777 Uh, my-- my wife shot a long-time family friend. 492 00:20:11,779 --> 00:20:12,404 Why? 493 00:20:12,429 --> 00:20:14,280 Oh, my god, oh, my god, oh, my god, Mr. Poopybutthole. 494 00:20:14,282 --> 00:20:15,681 - I-I thought-- - Keep breathing! 495 00:20:15,683 --> 00:20:17,483 - Oh, god. What's happening? - Look at me! 496 00:20:17,485 --> 00:20:19,251 Look at me! Don't-- don't fall asleep! 497 00:20:19,253 --> 00:20:21,287 Is-- is this what bleeding to death is? 498 00:20:21,289 --> 00:20:23,088 Oh, whee. Is this how I die? 499 00:20:23,090 --> 00:20:24,290 Oh, geez! Oh, my god! 500 00:20:24,292 --> 00:20:25,925 Why would you do this, Beth? 501 00:20:25,927 --> 00:20:27,793 It's not supposed to hurt. 502 00:20:27,795 --> 00:20:29,795 I-I thought... 503 00:20:29,797 --> 00:20:31,030 Ooh, whee. 504 00:20:31,332 --> 00:20:35,234 ♪ 505 00:21:06,967 --> 00:21:09,235 Oh, he-- he's looking a lot better. 506 00:21:09,237 --> 00:21:12,004 Listen, Beth, don't torture yourself. 507 00:21:12,006 --> 00:21:14,206 I made a similar mistake years ago, 508 00:21:14,208 --> 00:21:16,475 but, you know, on a planetary scale. 509 00:21:16,477 --> 00:21:20,079 - Is, um, is he mad at me? - He's not pressing charges. 510 00:21:20,081 --> 00:21:22,681 I mean, that's got to be the "you shot me" equivalent 511 00:21:22,683 --> 00:21:24,316 of not being mad. 512 00:21:24,318 --> 00:21:28,921 - Can he have visitors? - He'd like to be alone. 513 00:21:28,923 --> 00:21:32,024 He told me to tell you he's sorry 514 00:21:32,026 --> 00:21:34,159 you didn't have bad memories of him? 515 00:21:35,328 --> 00:21:38,530 If you love him, you should leave. 516 00:21:42,502 --> 00:21:45,938 And that's the wa-a-a-a-y the news goes. 517 00:21:47,341 --> 00:21:48,941 Did you get any of that? 518 00:21:48,943 --> 00:21:51,010 It's-a good show-a. 519 00:21:51,034 --> 00:21:53,534 Sync & corrections by XhmikosR www.addic7ed.com 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net